Another couple found guilty of murder for parenting by "To Train Up a Child"

spartacus699
if you spare the rod you might spoil the child, they need to show respect to there parents. Most parents have no clue what the word "respect" even means anymore. They're the child and the child is the parent bossing them around. If you spare the rod you actually don't love you child very much.

What an absurd statement, if by "the rod" you're referring to actual corporal punishment. I was lucky enough to be raised by parents who knew the difference between discipline (intended to teach a child how to behave) and punishment (intended to penalize a child for past "bad" behavior, and possibly to make the punisher feel better). They loved me very much and they never inflicted any physical harm on me. When I misbehaved, I was usually told why what I did was wrong and how I could act more appropriately in the future, then put on "time out" to consider these messages. Sometimes privileges and/or items were taken away for a short period of time to reinforce the gravity of my misbehavior. They managed quite well to instill respect and propriety in me. I wasn't a perfect child by any means, but my "rebellions" paled in comparison to those of many of my peers.

As an adult, I can reflect upon my upbringing with immense gratitude, especially in light of the hell someone close to me went through because of abusive parenting. His mother loved the rod. Guess which one of us has a close, loving relationship with and great respect for their parents today...

With regards to the OP, I don't understand how anyone could support these "parenting methods" rather than seeing them as child abuse. I don't blame Christianity - I blame the individuals who stoop low enough to engage in or promote these abuses. I can't comprehend how a person could treat another person, let alone their own child, like that, but I guess I'm just a soft, bleeding-heart wimp, eh?

reply to post by Rhoswen


Indeed, basically the only people who would buy that book are people who already naturally gravitate to that type of parenting (if you can even call it that really). The Pearls are making millions off this book why? Because theyre are thousands if not millions of people who are buying the book and those people are already prone to torture, the book merely validates their approach. Since its such a horrendous book, only those who are already open to the idea of the degredation and torture if not attempted slow murder would buy it and probably buy it as much as a memento of the fact that they actually found a book that speaks to them (about child torture mind you). Like "oh man they actually sell something like this?? Gotta have it!"

reply to post by chr0naut


Thank you ....your comment is spot on...These tactics are the polar opposite of Christian behavior....It's sick, demented people like this who give all religion a bad name...If someone gave me a book like that and even praised it..I have enough common sense not to follow it's teachings.. are there that many weak minded people, who would follow a books teachings, no matter how vile...just because someone gave it to them...WTF ...some people just shouldn't have kids or pets.. and thats all there is to it !

OrphanApology
reply to post by kronos11

 

That's not a sign of a child being bad but a sign of a potentially gifted child.

www.sengifted.org...

Quite right!
My daughter taught her child sign language, he was just 11 months old. Its the best gift a parent could ever give a baby!
At just 11 months he could ask for food and drink, and more importantly he could ask for a cuddle!
It was extremely rare for him to cry, quite simply because he wasnt frustrated at not being able to say what he needed.
What really struck us was how he needed water when he first went onto solids, every other spoonfull he would sign for water, had he not been able to ask I suspect he'd have cried and thrown a tantrum.


PLEASE READ!
Dont buy a book that teaches punishment, buy a book that teaches sign langauge!

reply to post by kronos11


Please read my post HERE

amazing
And they wonder why there seems to be a war on Christianity. Do they really not know?

Oh for God's sake that's not Christianity.

When I saw the article I burst out in tears and I'm a grown man.

If you had any idea how hurtful your statement is you'd withdraw it.

To use this as a rod with with which to beat Christ and his followers is just too much to take! (tears)

I was "raised" on belts, blood and beatings.
When an 8 year old can take a punch from a grownup and stay on his feet, he's been beaten way too much.
I was one of several kids but I was the black sheep/scapegoat in the mix.
Step brothers and half brothers were treated with kid gloves while myself and my brother to a lesser degree were treated like animals and beaten for the most minor of offenses.

I used to get a daily beating based on what I might have done but didn't get caught at.

My siblings and I all had decent grades, no criminal records or drug use, no behavioral issues beyond minor kid stuff.
If you met me and my siblings today you would think that we all came from an ideal family.

Couldn't be further from the truth.
The violence was due to a chemically unbalanced stepmother and sycophantic father. Not because we were bad kids.

Most kids now days are treated pretty damn good and have pretty much devolved into a pack of animals from what I can see. Parents are afraid of the kids and don't discipline them at all.

There is no correlation between violence and good behavior. Violence only makes good kids miserable and bad kids worse.

Well adjusted and well behaved kids come from consistency and care with accountability. Not from beating the crap out of them, nor from letting children do whatever they want.

The problem now is that parents can't be bothered to moderate their behavior and pay attention to the kids.
They either treat the kids like crap and manipulate them or ignore them altogether and let them run amok.

reply to post by LightFinger


Those Pearl's sure aren't pearls in the gate of heaven, to be teaching the torture of children.

They're in big trouble one way or another, and will be held to account as will any parents who torture children.

Jesus had words about these people.

ChesterJohn
These people are freaks. The authors should be charged as well for advocating such endangering techniques.

This is not Christian, we don't advocate beating or starving our children as discipline.

a paddle is one thing but severe beatings NO. Starving NO.

I didn't want to spank my oldest any more for her constant disobedience, so the last Time which was 5 years ago I had her spank me for her offenses. She cried as she gave me the 3 swats she deserved and she has been very well behaved ever since.

Similarly Jesus took our punishment for sin on himself and bore it on the cross.

Oh that's a good one! Hilarious, awesome! You're funny, and a good example of Christian love, unless you spanked her a lot, that's abuse.

amazing
And they wonder why there seems to be a war on Christianity. Do they really not know?

What does this book have to do with Christianity?

reply to post by OccamsRazor04


Bible has multiple instances of holy child abuse.

For people who are firm believers that includes those parts as well.

reply to post by OccamsRazor04


I am not saying it does and I certainly hope that its claims that it is within the Christian teachings are complete BS by the authors but that is why the book is so dangerous. The authors of the book have a ministry and claim that the methods they prescribe in the book are a Christian way. The book is popular with Christian homeschoolers and for a time it was endorsed by several ministries. Since the murders those ministries have taken the book off their must read lists.

I certainly do not want this thread to turn into a left right Christian not Christian thing but the post you replied to has some merit based off of the books origins and the circles it has been popular in.

chr0naut
reply to post by Grimpachi

 

Please don't describe this book as Christian.

It is a sadistic and vile evil, purporting to be Christian in order to deceive desperate and gullible people.

A wolf in sheep's clothing.

Sorry, but this is a Christian book whether you like it or not.

It is listed on Amazon under Books > Christian Books & Bibles > Christian Living > Family.

It is a Christian book. One of the significant aspects of Christians is the preponderance of renunciation when faced with something that doesn't "look good" but which is part of their religion.

You cannot just toss out the request to "Please don't describe this book as Christian." when it is most definitely a Christian book.

As opposed to trying to distance yourself from reality maybe you should take this opportunity to start being more honest with yourself and really, truly examine just exactly what being a Christian is.

reply to post by chr0naut


well said , well said indeed, real christians would never ever do that !!!!

reply to post by JRCrowley


so because its labelled as , that means it is ?, are you horribly stupid ????

Geez, listen to the wails of "That's not a Christian book!". Asinine thing is, if this How-to-Mentally-and-Physically-Abuse manual was written by a Muslim couple, I suspect most of you renouncers would be all over it like flies on horse poo slamming Islam & calling the book Muslim through & through.

It might be a fundie book by a fundie couple, but it's still freakin' Christian material. Kind of like Muslims radicals & their books. A radical is still a Muslim of some degree or another at the end of the day, whether anyone likes it or not. And I would go so far as to say the Pearls are radicals in the sense that this is an extreme interpretation of how to parent as a Christian, so there is also that to consider.

As for banning the book, what good would that do? It would end up being lent out by people who already own it & making the rounds the old fashioned way rather than as a brand new copy each time.

It is a book by Christian fundamentalists who go so far as to recommend not following the book in front of the public so that the people following it not be reported to child services. It is on their website. Just learned that from the ATS radio show.

I heard it said that the book is great aside from the bad parts. Err..what? Look any piece of literature can have some good points but it must be judged as a hole. This book has obviously been taken literally by some and that makes it dangerous to the general public. I am not advocating destroying any literature I am just saying don’t buy it don’t follow it and if you know anyone with the book to have a talk with them on the subject.

This book is 20+ years old - it's not like they are sucking the brains out of babies at abortion clinics...

OrphanApology
reply to post by OccamsRazor04

 

Bible has multiple instances of holy child abuse.

For people who are firm believers that includes those parts as well.

I see, I had no idea. Please tell me these verses so I can show them to people.

reply to post by BABYBULL24

This book is 20+ years old

"So your saying there is no telling how many children have been abused and mistreated through the years because of the book. Probably far more than we can imagine."

it's not like they are sucking the brains out of babies at abortion clinics...

"And abortion is bad it is preferable to have instances where fundies are beating and starving their adopted daughter Hana to death."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Is that a correct interpretation of your post? Well I agree with the first part of your post not the second.