Does Going to Church make you a better person?

A curious question i've been wondering...

Recently I met a wonderful woman who makes my heart sing... and im sure some of you know shes Very Religious... She told me recently that "IF we were to be together in the future, I would have to attend her church... which is fine I suppose... Any relationship requires sacrifice... but I've also learned that I would have to go 2x on sunday...

*sigh*

Which... again, is fine... though I loath the idea of spending several hours of my day listening to some preacher ramble on about what he believes about the bible while half the audience falls asleep... Im sure i'll be one of them... and I suppose its a good way to catch up on sleep.

I wonder though... Do Christians believe that going to church is winning favor with God?

Do you Christians believe going to Church makes you a better Christian?

I have to wonder if they've ever read Matthew 6... IF you haven't... Well... *facepalm*

Here's what im referring to....

Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.

2 Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

3 But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth:

4 That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly.

5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.

The verse following these lovely words speaks of "vain repetitions" which win you no favor with God... which is interestingly similar to the silly hymns I recall singing over and over in my childhood...

So tell me you church goers... do you believe church makes you a better person?

reply to post by Akragon


Of course, in the mind of the goer, especially if you put some money into the pot.
Why else would you go, because a family member(s) put pressure to go, you would go to impress voters, employers, other people, or the kicker, you were born into going to church and never questioned the action? But even then you would feel better about yourself one way or another.

On the other hand, if you can honest say that none of the above reason had any part of why you would voluntarily go to a religious building, then you could honestly feel good about your action.

Your actions define what kind of person you are.
Simply showing up somewhere does not.
So short answer is no, it doesn't make you a better person.

I also have a woman who makes my heart sing but if she ever demanded I attend her church for her that would be it for me. I would be heartbroken but that kind of control and demand is not love.

reply to post by Akragon


Growing up as a Texan Southern Baptist; it was the church members that turned me away from the church and organized religion in general.

It was the arrogant, racist, hypocritical, holier than thou members of that small rural church that opened my eyes and made me start questioning authority. Even as a little kid, I saw thru their fear based mind control techniques.

I am a better person now because I left the dogmatic thinking patterns the church teaches.

Every night when I go to bed I have a conversation with God. We are in good terms. I have read the Bible (well,most of it) and decided that I do not believe that I need a Book to tell me how to treat people, be charitable, treat people as you would want to be treated, and well, just be nice to people. I was raised a Catholic, (and not a good one) and am sad to to say that the only times that I go to Mass is for a wedding or funeral. From early on, going to church and participation in church activities are good for your soul. Well, so is picking up trash in the hood, so is collection food for the local food bank, so is giving a few bucks to the guy on the off ramp. I am at peace with God, and hopefully he is O.K. with me.
Just a thought, during WW2, if he was at all concerned with worship, would he have allowed Allied and Axis bombing that destroyed HIS place's of worship. I underscore World-War

reply to post by olaru12

Well said.

Church is a club like any other club. Those that have disassociated from that look back at those still trapped and muse.

A trap of ideas.

Thank you all for your replies... though it seems that you've all been jaded by something or another in regards to "going to church"

I would like to hear from someone on our forum that is a regular at his/her church, so they could explain why they believe its necessary to attend.

I believe my girlfriend would probably be there every day if she had that option... but the interesting thing is, she actually takes notes on the sermons... I've read through a few of her "notes", and I've noticed that they barely touch on the gospels...

Now I do know that most churches do not deal much with the gospels for some reason, they tend to preach about everything within the bible except the words where their "God" is found...

This has always confused me....

reply to post by Akragon

Confusing is in not?

Better? No.
Poorer..Yes.(2nd book of the Bible and God already wants your money)

Don't need someone else to tell me about the big questions, that's why God gave me a thinking mind...the whole world is my church

reply to post by Akragon

Do Christians believe that going to church is winning favor with God?

Not only but attendance is required. It shows your commitment, your un lagging faith. They don't say that outright, its understood though. Otherwise, why go? Its one of the tenants, find a church and make it "your home". Where will you worship but in a "house of God" with other worshippers?

The temple Christ spoke of was displaced a long time ago to mean a building. He meant out hearts. He even said where there are three of you gathered in his name there will he be also. Well since a church has bunches he will be there and thats another reason to go. Not agreeing with any of this just relaying what the unspoken "rules" are.

Do you Christians believe going to Church makes you a better Christian?

"Churchians" believe that not going is a falling away. Once you are saved you are "forgiven" and going to "heaven" (everybody wants that). If you stop going or go less then that is a danger sign that you are losing your "faith". You are backsliding. You are falling into old habits (not going). Then the devil will tempt you, and then you are going to hell, forever.

You must understand that any attempt to question this faith your gf or the church has will be met with concern and attention on their part to make you become one of them. They will make you their project. They have to, otherwise they are not "fishers of men". The higher up the hierarchy the more obsessed they are with this. The more they have to prove this is what they are doing.

So be warned. Nothing you can do will change their minds in their "house". You are playing with fire by hanging around the fringes. All that will happen is you will eventually be declared a lost cause and they will give you over to the devil and tell your girlfriend to dump you. When that happens you will be rejected by all those people and God and your GF. Save yourself the grief and detach now while you still can. To you this might seem innocent enough, they on the other hand (even though covered with smiles and hugs) are serious as hell.

reply to post by Akragon


I believe in a higher power but not in the church. I don't believe we need to go to a certain building at a set time to be a true believer or be a good person of faith. I grew up going to church every Sunday and I saw through it at a young age. It's just an organized group/club.
What's sad is, the majority of the people I know that are church goers go because "I think" they think people will view them in a better light. But in truth, they are ones that have the most flaws; lying, cheating, drinking, etc etc.... To me, they hide behind the cross.
I know "something" exists in the spiritual world but I couldn't tell you what it is though. I don't think there's a book on it. Wish there was.
If someone is telling you to attend their church.... I'd beware. That isn't normal. That person may initially make you feel better but... something isn't right there. Be careful.

reply to post by Akragon


Some of us aren't able to get out, but would love to go.

No, it does not make you a better person, but if you enjoy the service and the people, then it's ok. Maybe your girlfriend is committed to something she believes in? Has it done her harm?

reply to post by intrptr

You must understand that any attempt to question this faith your gf or the church has will be met with concern and attention on their part to make you become one of them. They will make you their project. They have to, otherwise they are not "fishers of men". The higher up the hierarchy the more obsessed they are with this. The more they have to prove this is what they are doing.

Oh I understand my friend... I've already been asked to attend one of their services... I've gotten a book called "rediscovering the richness of the reformed faith"... which is basically an inspirational book about how this guy found his faith in this particular sect of Christianity...

They've talked to a minister apparently... and from what im hearing, they will do whatever it takes to convert me up to and until 3 years of marriage... after which they will give up...

Fortunately they have no idea who their dealing with...

WarminIndy
reply to post by Akragon

 

Some of us aren't able to get out, but would love to go.

No, it does not make you a better person, but if you enjoy the service and the people, then it's ok. Maybe your girlfriend is committed to something she believes in? Has it done her harm?

Well she is the most amazing girl I've ever met... but shes led a sheltered life... Uncorrupted by the world...

She loves her faith, and her church... which I have no issues with... I would gladly attend her church if it would make her happy....

but if they think they will change my beliefs... they have another thing coming

Akragon
Thank you all for your replies... though it seems that you've all been jaded by something or another in regards to "going to church"

I would like to hear from someone on our forum that is a regular at his/her church, so they could explain why they believe its necessary to attend.

I believe my girlfriend would probably be there every day if she had that option... but the interesting thing is, she actually takes notes on the sermons... I've read through a few of her "notes", and I've noticed that they barely touch on the gospels...

Now I do know that most churches do not deal much with the gospels for some reason, they tend to preach about everything within the bible except the words where their "God" is found...

This has always confused me....

There is one thing about going to Mass every Sunday or everyday. You have the knowledge that every Catholic in the world is reading and talking/preaching the same part of the Bible. It is sort of a feeling of oneness. As I have said before, I am not a very good Catholic, but I try, and when you do try, it feels good.

Akragon
reply to post by intrptr

 

You must understand that any attempt to question this faith your gf or the church has will be met with concern and attention on their part to make you become one of them. They will make you their project. They have to, otherwise they are not "fishers of men". The higher up the hierarchy the more obsessed they are with this. The more they have to prove this is what they are doing.

Oh I understand my friend... I've already been asked to attend one of their services... I've gotten a book called "rediscovering the richness of the reformed faith"... which is basically an inspirational book about how this guy found his faith in this particular sect of Christianity...

They've talked to a minister apparently... and from what im hearing, they will do whatever it takes to convert me up to and until 3 years of marriage... after which they will give up...

Fortunately they have no idea who their dealing with...

Oh, Reform Theology. Then here you go, tell them you might be already going to heaven because of TULIP.

Here is what TULIP is...

T = Total Depravity
U = Unconditional Election
L = Limited Atonement
I = Irresistible Grace
P = Perseverance of the saints

This is what it all means, man is so totally depraved he cannot come to God on his own, therefore God unconditionally elects some people before time to go to heaven, and those who are predestined were the only ones eligible for the atoning of Christ and therefore, God saves you whether you want or not, no matter the condition you are in and then keeps you as you are until you go to heaven.

That's Reform Theology.

What it boils down to is this, since they don't know who is going to heaven, only God does because God predestined some people, then you are lucky if you are predestined, otherwise the atonement at the cross isn't for you if you aren't predestined. And because God predestined some people, it didn't matter their condition that He seals them in, until they get there.

Under predestination, you don't even have to believe in the first place. But you are SOL if you aren't predestined.

And if you did believe, it was all a waste of your time if you were not predestined. So if they argue with you, just tell them how do they know you aren't predestined already?

reply to post by WarminIndy


Interesting... I'll remember that

Thank you very much my friend...

Akragon
Thank you all for your replies... though it seems that you've all been jaded by something or another in regards to "going to church"

I would like to hear from someone on our forum that is a regular at his/her church, so they could explain why they believe its necessary to attend.

I believe my girlfriend would probably be there every day if she had that option... but the interesting thing is, she actually takes notes on the sermons... I've read through a few of her "notes", and I've noticed that they barely touch on the gospels...

Now I do know that most churches do not deal much with the gospels for some reason, they tend to preach about everything within the bible except the words where their "God" is found...

This has always confused me....

A few points from my perspective.

1) I once had a pastor who said "Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to McDonalds makes you a cheeseburger". He was dead right. Church doesn't make you a Christian, it just makes you someone who goes to church. Even then, it's not about being good. Jesus said "no one is good but God alone", a point reiterated by Isaiah and Romans too.

2) Most churches in the modern era are rubbish. Mine included. I go to church because I appreciate being with other Christians, and because I enjoy the time spent listening to the sermons. I take notes of my own, and they very rarely follow the same tangent as the sermon, but that's part of the beauty of it.

3) If you find a church that isn't teaching the whole Bible, that's a serious problem. "All Scripture is God-breathed", 2 Timothy says... so all Scripture should be taught. That includes prophecy (which is about 2/3 of the bible), which most churches avoid, simply because they don't understand it.

Ultimately this is all up to you.
Going to church isn't going to help you if your heart isn't in the right place. But on the other hand, if you're open to the possibility that the God of all the Universe still speaks, then you might just learn something. Either way, though, church will neither save you nor damn you. Salvation comes through Christ alone, not through the church. The problem at the heart of man is separation from God, caused by sin. That's not solved by going to church. It was solved through Christ taking the punishment for our sin, allowing for that separation to be dealt with once and for all. That's all that matters.

That's Reform Theology.

What it boils down to is this, since they don't know who is going to heaven, only God does because God predestined some people, then you are lucky if you are predestined, otherwise the atonement at the cross isn't for you if you aren't predestined. And because God predestined some people, it didn't matter their condition that He seals them in, until they get there.

Under predestination, you don't even have to believe in the first place. But you are SOL if you aren't predestined.

And if you did believe, it was all a waste of your time if you were not predestined. So if they argue with you, just tell them how do they know you aren't predestined already?

Ugh. Reformed theology. I go to a Presbyterian church, so... they're Calvinist (Calvinism being the teachings regarding predestination that were mentioned above - signified by TULIP). It's utter rubbish, it really is. It's not even logically consistent, let alone Biblically consistent. There's some excellent info on this on YouTube...

reply to post by Akragon

Fortunately they have no idea who their dealing with…

Thanks for the chuckle.

So you're going to play along? Your going to rescue her or something?

It is you who doesn't realize whom you are dealing with. I have a friend who swore church was the best place to meet girls. He used to go on about, they're so pretty, so many and soo single. He married one and she turned on him, changed from the sweet innocent girl to this horrible controlling monster. Like a whole new person came out of her after the vows. He anguished over this for years before finally divorcing her.

Then he told me don't pick up on women from church, they are all friends and all think alike. They have hidden agendas, complex psychological problems and are raging lunatics just under that sweet surface. Thats why there are so many there, they are misfits and hang in church where they are "forgiven" and don't have to change. Nobody wants them.

Be warned dude. My mom is like this, my brothers wife is like this too. They are both church women. Run for your life.

Besides, you would be competing with their definition of a real man, Jesus. How can you hope to measure up? Unless you are a higher level demon than the ones under church roofs, don't mess with the beast.

Sorry about being direct… and not. Just relaying my experience for what its worth.

intrptr
reply to post by Akragon

 

Fortunately they have no idea who their dealing with…

Thanks for the chuckle.

So you're going to play along? Your going to rescue her or something?

It is you who doesn't realize whom you are dealing with. I have a friend who swore church was the best place to meet girls. He used to go on about, they're so pretty, so many and soo single. He married one and she turned on him, changed from the sweet innocent girl to this horrible controlling monster. Like a whole new person came out of her after the vows. He anguished over this for years before finally divorcing her.

Then he told me don't pick up on women from church, they are all friends and all think alike. They have hidden agendas, complex psychological problems and are raging lunatics just under that sweet surface. Thats why there are so many there, they are misfits and hang in church where they are "forgiven" and don't have to change. Nobody wants them.

Be warned dude. My mom is like this, my brothers wife is like this too. They are both church women. Run for your life.

Besides, you would be competing with their definition of a real man, Jesus. How can you hope to measure up? Unless you are a higher level demon than the ones under church roofs, don't mess with the beast.

Sorry about being direct… and not. Just relaying my experience for what its worth.

uhh... hmmm

That scares me a little LOL

On the plus side... I love to tickle "the beast"

I have no intention of "rescuing her" from anything, though I am hoping I will be able to show her some of the issues I have with this "entire bible is truth" baloney...

Once she sees the flaws herself perhaps she'll listen to reason... Probably not though, but it will be fun in any case...