Dear Daughter

Where did our relationship go?
Did you discard it like an old stuffed toy,
too torn and disheveled to save.

Did you grow too old to need me anymore?
Do you no longer have any feelings attached to it?
Does it take too much effort?

Is there any hope of repair?
Perhaps a needle and thread,
a patch or two to mend the tear.

Our words are so cautiously chosen,
superficial and mechanical,
fearful of the slightest emotion.

We stare at each other across our lives,
afraid to approach each other,
fearful of the abyss.

My words seem to fall to the floor.
I have become the wallflower in your world,
wanting to dance but afraid to ask.

I have become your worst teacher,
the principal to be avoided,
the feared rule keeper.

Where have I failed?
You hold no stock in my opinions.
I have become a fool in your eyes.

I cry like Jesus.
I want to gather you under my wings
like a mother hen gathers her chicks.

What have I done?
What can I make right?
I ask for forgiveness.

I desire no obligatory response from you,
no action born out of guilt,
but love freely given.

Love desired,
love initiated by love,
love for love’s sake.

Dear daughter, I have become a stranger,
one with no place in your life’s manager.
I am turned away from your inn.

I stand in the dark,
looking at you from outside,
with no way in.