You know your getting old

You finally find something you've been looking for, for ages but can't remember why you wanted it.

You can't finish a conversation, because you don't remember what you were talking about.

Your spare tire is larger than your car's.

You are declined as an organ donor - you're told they're not sure if your organs are functional.

You reach the toilet but you forgot what you wanted to do.

You had to get rid of your dog he kept trying to drag you to the yard to bury you.

You try to donate to a sperm bank but they insist they require live specimens.

A passing funeral procession pauses to see if you need a lift.

Children often innocently ask you, "What did people do before electricity?" And you can't remember.

You discover the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down.

Everyone is happy to give you a ride because they don't want you behind the wheel.

reply to post by ANNED


What?! WHAT?! Speak louder, young boy! I can't hear nor read so good! *mumble mumble*

Bah, thats whats wrong with todays youth! Always facebonking, always.. What?! What did I want here?


*in fact, I am nearly that age myself.. Forgetting things? Check! Ranting about the young? Well, if they didn't behave: Check! And so on and on... Frightening, I tell you!

good stuff - uhh wut was ... uhh...l8r

OP is faking. Old people dont know how to use the interweb. Obviously being Trolled by a middle school student. Schools out for summer vacation.....We should on the look out.

You know you are old when you think there is little point in buying green bananas.
You know you are old when you attend a funeral and think there is hardly any point in going back home after.

You know your getting old when the word 'DEPENDS' has a whole new meaning.

You know your getting old when you break the wind and think someone else did it.

You know your getting old when you can remember when airliners still had pistons and props.

Good gravy, I surly do miss the sound of a 3350 coming to life and its sweet roar as it heads down the runway.

You see all toys as cheaply produced plastic that is way overpriced.

You do not follow fads and you were your own style of clothes.

You become cheaper and frugal.

When

About half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief".

An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee!

At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you're not eating cereal.

Conversations with people your own age often turn into "dueling ailments."

Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.

Getting a little action means you don't need to take a laxative.

Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.

You burn the midnight oil till 9PM.

Hmmmmmmmmmm scary

Cody

The Doctor wants blood, urine, and stool tests. So you leave your undershorts.

And the Doctor looks like a High School freshman!

And he/she is watching tv instead of writing things in your paper chart.

reply to post by StrangeTimez

Old people dont know how to use the interweb

Who do you think invented it? Do you realise that there are a large number of people on ATS who are over 65, myself included, many of whom have used the "interweb" (aka Internet) since it first started. My Mother, rest her soul, was still using a computer and accessing the web at 91.

Your remark is just completely and utterly ageist, and I am going to return an ageist remark and say I am guessing that you are probably too young to actually know very much about the world and what makes it tick. Bear in mind that most tribal communities had a Council of Elders - and many still do. Why do you think that is/was? Oh yes, because older people have experience.

PS and old people do not understand tongue in cheek so often perhaps!

reply to post by ANNED


I am so glad that based on those criteria I am obviously still young S/F

Of course one is probably only old when others think so because aside for slowing down physically a bit I don't otherwise feel any different than I did when I was 50 or even 40.

I know i will date myself
but i remember when the internet was called ARPANET

When you remember life BEFORE the internet, cable and satellite television, cell phones, VCR's, CD's, walkmans, video game consoles and Star Wars

reply to post by ANNED


You know your getting old when...?...what was the question?

reply to post by ANNED


Oh yeah. You know your getting old:

When you think MP4 is a rank in the Military Police.
When you think a kid is stupid because he can't spell LOLLY POP and stops at LOL.
When you think RAM is a goat.
When you think of Charles Dickens whenever someone says CD.
When you think STD is an abbreviation for Standard.

/reading glasses on

- When you hurt in places you never even knew existed
- You get a burst of energy and need to lay down until it passes
- You're get up and go, just got up and went
- You no longer trust "passing wind" as being just that



"First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down." ~ George Burns





/reading glasses off