6th grader dies after being puched in the face by a bully

reply to post by woodsmom


We have already experienced bullying with my son who is only five. It happened this year already and the previous year. This is Pre-K. I knew that we would encounter this at some point, but at four and five years old? That is ridiculous.

He has some delays, that have improved greatly, but, he is still not on par with his peers according to the 'experts'. There is a huge problem with accepting and tolerating differences among children because of these notions of 'normal' that are perpetuated by the 'cookie cutter' society in which we live.

All kids are different, they cannot all be expected to follow the same course of development. Isn't variety the spice of life? We should be celebrating our differences instead of giving them clinical names and making the children feel that they are somehow inadequate, because, their development doesn't match up to the mold that we are made to believe is 'normal'.

Children are as unique as our fingerprints and this should be celebrated rather than stigmatized. If it were, we might see a lot less bullying than we do currently.

reply to post by Wertdagf

Would make people second guess having children and in this day and age thats a good thing.

I disagree with you on that, i blame the parents of that Bully who did this and since this poor child had died that Bully should be charged with Murder.

There are no excuses for Bullying. Bullies think they are so cool


My wishes go out to the family and i hope the brat who did this will be charged.

reply to post by Onewhoknowsjesus


let he/she who is without
sin cast the first stone

reply to post by iwilliam


My eight year old daughter was being bullied on the bus ride home from school.

I talked to the bus driver.
I talked to the school teacher.
I talked to the principal.
I talked to the superintendant.

Not a thing changed.

Soon, my daughter came home crying and had pop sickle sticks stuck in her hair.
I found out the last name of the bully.
Looked up that last name in the phone book.
Called and spoke with the dad and told him this.
"If your child bullies my daughter again,
I have your address from the phone book,
and I will be on your front yard at 530 pm
and will expect you to be there waiting for me
cause I intend to kick your ass in front of
your child and my daughter." "Got it???"

No more bullying.
end of story.

Bullying sucks because our society victimized the victims. Can't fight back cause then you're the asshole. Can't go tell anybody cause then you are a tattle tale and the status quo treats you even worse. We live in a messed up barbaric society.

There is no solution to bullying. Nobody is going o stand up for the victim. In fact we actually join in with the bully and further terrorize the victim in a mob mentality.

Sadly there is only one real solution to bullying. Make it so that if someone bullys you all bets are off. You should be allowed to literally retaliate. It's sad but with terrorists and bullies the only solution is to out bully them. Also why aren't bully's considered terrorists. Same rational.

When I was in grade school I got bullied a lot. And by the "coolest" jock in the school. Then one day I had had enough and when he was smacking me around I strait decked him and then proceeded to kick the crap out of him. Guess what. Where were all the right ons, and pats on the back after I defended myself. there were none. Instead I got. You're and asshole because you beat up the "coolest" kid in school were suspending you, but not the bully. I got suspended WTF. the teachers and admin knew I was getting smacked around literally at school. But most school teacher's especially the ones running the playgrounds are about as intelligent as the bullies. It's like if you play fair, are polite and patient with other people you are the asshole who deserves getting bullied because you're weak or something. Instead the fact is you are the only civilized person in the arena at the time and the rest are all a bunch of devolved monkeys.

And we wonder why we have a youth violence problem. Could be blow back for our own uncivilized behavior. F bullies. Sue the school. Sue the parents, Sue the teachers on the playground that knew this sort f thing was going on. Sue the kid and then put him in general population for manslaughter. See how he likes prison's version of the 52 Blocks.

Perhaps I missed it but was there a factual account of what happened when the kid was punched? I find it pretty hard to believe that a bully just punched the kid in the face for no reason. Most bullies are kids with low self-esteem who don't get violent until backed into a corner in front of their peers.

slugger9787- If you did that to me the cops would be putting you in cuffs so fast it would make your head spin. (of course my kid knows right from wrong so that would not be an issue)

reply to post by BASSPLYR


Your mood is listed as cant complain.
Yet that is all you did on your post reply.
Go get some good counseling for your
repressed feelings.
Come back with a smile on your face.

Point finger and say uncivilized
yet you were the one who was
physically fighting on the school yard.

Originally posted by backwherewestarted
Perhaps I missed it but was there a factual account of what happened when the kid was punched? I find it pretty hard to believe that a bully just punched the kid in the face for no reason. Most bullies are kids with low self-esteem who don't get violent until backed into a corner in front of their peers.

Bailey was reportedly jumped by two boys during recess and sustained multiple blows to his head and face.

Those seizures started nearly two weeks after O'Neill was jumped by two classmates during recess, according to O'Neill's family. He suffered a concussion as well as a broken nose in the fight. After the seizures began, doctors put the boy in a medically-induced coma.

NBC link

reply to post by jonnywhite


Very cool post johnny. i was bullied sometimes at school but I don't think they deserve to be forgiven. As bono from u2 once said "to hurt is to steal" and all they did was steal from people all day long. Thieves are punished and they are the worst thieves because they take some peoples self esteem and throw it in the garbage. Education is the key though, it can never be stopped until understanding the root cause is reached.

reply to post by goou111

Schools need a zero tolerance policy on real Bullying and a more relaxed stance on pretend guns.

Originally posted by Wertdagf
reply to post by CX

 

Would make people second guess having children and in this day and age thats a good thing.

Reduce population and increase responsible reproduction. Id go as far to even say parents should be held liable for their children forever.

If we had to go down that route, i'd say maybe up to 18. As an adult, you may take very different paths and choices than what your parents taught you. If you make an adult choice to do something stupid, it may have nothing to do with how your parents brought you up.

Not everyone in prison has bad parenting.

CX.

Originally posted by Wertdagf
reply to post by goou111

 

The parents should be charged aswell.

Amazingly sad bit of news.

edit on 4-3-2013 by Wertdagf because: (no reason given)

Wow, wertgerf and I actually agree on something here.
Truly, the world is going to end!
The bully needs to be made an example of, murder, manslaughter, or whatever, he needs to be prosecuted along with his negligent parents. This story then needs to be retold every year at the beginning of school. From 2nd grade to High School. Then violators will be prosecuted.

Originally posted by daryllyn
It is incredibly sad that our children cannot be safe at school.

I am thinking about homeschooling. Seriously.

Do it! Children are not safe in schools. Sometimes the teachers are worse than their fellow students.

My sons will never go to a regular school, when it's time for them to start (2 1/2 yrs. and 3 months old right now). It's not worth it. Yes, anything can happen to anyone, any place, at any time, but I for one do not want to increase those odds by sending my children where there is a possibility of them being shot, stabbed, beat up, all in the same little enclosed area! By either a student, or a teacher, for crying out loud.

Here is a ink to many examples showing how it is a better idea to homeschool them: www.remnantofgod.org...

If you institutionalize a kid that young and charge them with something it WILL stigmatize the rest of their life and most probably lead them to become a worse person in their maturity.

Obvious unintended consequence. This is one of those situations where a soft touch and stern disappointment rather than consequences rendered by the law would be wise.

When you're young its always feels worse and sticks in your mind longer and helps you learn when the authority figures in your life are utterly disappointed with you.

Unless the child is a total diagnosed violent sociopath already it would be unwise to institutionalize him at all.

Originally posted by Retikx
If you institutionalize a kid that young and charge them with something it WILL stigmatize the rest of their life and most probably lead them to become a worse person in their maturity.

Obvious unintended consequence. This is one of those situations where a soft touch and stern disappointment rather than consequences rendered by the law would be wise.

When you're young its always feels worse and sticks in your mind longer and helps you learn when the authority figures in your life are utterly disappointed with you.

Unless the child is a total diagnosed violent sociopath already it would be unwise to institutionalize him at all.

edit on 6-3-2013 by Retikx because: (no reason given)

All due respect but that is nonsence.. Thats the problem people wanna coddle these damm kids and tell them "oh were so disappointed with you for killing that 12 year old kid " you're grounded...

these kids were way old enough to know you dont jump another kid a recess

Bullying is very wrong and those who do it should be punished in some way....but..There is no evidence that bullying took place, or that the victim, for all we know, could have been the one bullying. The incident as quoted in the link only offers the family opinion that it was a bullying incident.... Its wrong to jump to conclusions based on your own personal feelings promoted by the word "Bullying",

It is so sad that a 12 year old has died, but without the information needed to confirm the boy died because of a Bully, condemnation is wrong.

Respects.

Originally posted by backwherewestarted

Most bullies are kids with low self-esteem who don't get violent until backed into a corner in front of their peers.

where did you come up with THAT line of manure? what you are describing is NOT a BULLY but a VICTIM of bullying. or have you found an interesting way to blame victims of bullying for being the bully themselves. "bullies" don't get violent because they are pushed into a corner, bullies get violent because they like to prove their superiority over others by beating the crap out of them. VICTIMS are the ones who are not looking for a fight but have no choice but to use as extreme violence as they are capable of to protect themselves, when backed into a corner.

as for those misguided people who just recommend "fighting back". IT DOES NOT WORK in many cases. i would have given ANYTHING for the bullying to stop. finally i DID fight back, you know what happened? it certainly WAS NOT being left alone. what happened was that as SOON AS I STARTED TO WIN, the bullies friends would JUMP IN to help out. all it caused was MORE PAIN and damage to me, as well as causing the NEED for me to USE WEAPONS AGAINST them. after all rather hard for one person to deal with 5 or 6 (up to over 20) attackers at once without resorting to weapon use. so much better would it have been for the teachers and principle to deal with the bullies.

So Jesus says, turn the other cheek,
do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

one thing most people have missed in this. it was NOT just ONE BULLY. but TWO bullies beating this kid. sure one of them seems to have done the damage, but BOTH deserve to be harshly punished. they were both administering the beating and as such both bear equal responsibility for what their actions have caused.

At the time, family members said two students were bullying the boy when one of them punched Bailey in the face, breaking his nose and causing a concussion.

articles.philly.com...

especially seeing it was TWO ON ONE they should have been IMMEDIATELY charged with assault and as soon as the kid died the charges should have been upgraded to murder. one reason bullying has become so bad is that bullies are not dealt with, they are given a slap on the wrist if anything, in many cases the ONLY person who gets in trouble is the victim as they "must be doing something" to cause it. how does that drive the lesson home not to bully?

I don't think anyone in the world has come up with a good way to actually stop bullying. Except for teaching your children to be good respectful people, every possible fix could backfire.

To share an example many times harassment and physical altercations are a two way street. Some kids don't get along, and they fight with each other, just like adults do. I don't think these type of situations need to be dealt with harshly at all.

Do you think it's a coincidence that school shootings would have been unimaginable in the past? Even though kids had more access to guns back then than they do now. They were allowed to bring guns to school, and schools had shooting clubs. Obviously the gun's aren't the cause of school shootings, the behavior of children is.

In the past if two kids had a problem, and got a fist fight, they might get a slap on the wrist. Now there is this "zero tolerance" BS. You can't get in a fist fight or else you get suspended or some other ridiculously extreme punishment. So instead of these kids working out their differences in a fist fight, the kids hold it in. For years they take all the abuse and hold in their feelings. Until they snap, and kill as many people as possible.

I honestly feel that's why there are school shootings, they refuse to allow boys to be boys. Me and everyone I knew when I was a kid would wrestle, box, get in fights, it was an excellent way to relieve the pressure and stress of being a kid, and to get that one guy to leave you the heck alone. But the school doesn't allow this, they make you seem like you are an evil monster if you get in a fight.

Not having a pressure valve for that stress causes it to build up until it explodes, and when it explodes kids die. Would you rather have kids getting in fights or shooting up schools?

I bring this up, because it's relevant to the subject of how to deal with bullies. Not everyone who makes fun of someone, or beats someone up is a bully. Sometimes a kid gets beaten up because he is a jackarse. Sometimes kids get harassed because they are acting like a-holes and their fellow students are sick of it.

Say john smith is getting harassed by a few fellow students, gets sick of it, and punches one in the face. Is that the best way to deal with the situation? Not really... but I bet those kids leave him alone. And the kid also got to feel good about standing up to a bully, he no longer feels like a victim who gets chit on all the time. He'd probably be less likely to explode and shoot up a school years down the line.

Say the school sees john smith punch the other kid, and then john smith gets in trouble. Now he feels that not only are his fellow students against him, but the school is against him too. He gets harassed, and then gets in trouble when he stands up to his harassers. He's unlikely to stand up for himself anymore, knowing he'll get in trouble, so he continues to get abused.

Real bullies are usually pretty good at hiding their abuse of others. Just curious, with the OP's story how do we know the poor child that passed away wasn't actually a bully to the other guy, and the other guy got sick of it?

I was always bigger and stronger than my peers when I was in school. But I was tormented by kids half my size in elementary school. When I got to middle school it got to be too much to take, and I asked my parents to be home schooled to avoid the bullies. They had no idea that I was being tormented so, because I never said anything. They asked why I didn't stand up for myself, and I said because we aren't supposed to fight or argue, basically because the school trains kids at a young age to be unprincipled pushovers.

My parents told me that if I got in trouble for defending myself they would support me 100%. Guess what? I went on a crusade of kicking wholesale ass for the rest of the school year. I was suspended several times, and my parents would take me out for ice cream and hamburgers, or go-carts, or some other fun activity when I was suspended. They knew what was going on, they refused to put up with the school's BS. I was being tormented, I stood up for myself, and I won. I was never bullied again at that school, and because of how my attitude changed I was never bullied in high school either.

This changed who I was to become as a person. If it wasn' t for that experience, it's likely I would have grown up to be a pushover who lets people take advantage him and abuse him.

It's incredibly tragic that this child lost his life, it's a freak accident and I'm sure the perpetrator feels horrible and did not intent to kill the poor kid. I mean really, who attempts to kill someone by punching them in the face? Aside from professional fighters who would even think they were capable of killing someone by sucker punching them in the face.

The kid should totally be punished, but not in a way that's going to ruin the rest of his life. We don't know who really bullies who, and there's no point in destroying two lives.