Here hyah here hyah, step right up my able minded friends.
Are you tired of hearing ominous 2012 myths over and over? Do your friends think you're in on some enormous conspiracy trying to hide the truth from
them for disbelieving the claims?
I have a wonderful new invention for you, and it will be yours for only 3 easy payments of 49.95.
Decodes common doomsday jargin for what it really means.
*Doomsday lunatic 1 " Omg, only 18 more days until 12,21,12"
With the use of the handy dandy 2012 bull# decoder ring you can find out what they really mean.
Translation: " I have no life, and I'm too much of a coward for suicide. I live in my mother's basement and wish for the end of the world to kill
us all."
Doomsday lunatic 2 " I had a vision about something earth changing happening on like 12.21.12. I'm like so in tune with the universe."
Translation " I'm starved for attention, likely because my parents didn't love me enough. I'm an avid drug abuser."
If you act now, I'll double your order. That's right folks, if you order today you'll get two 2012 bull# decoder rings for 3 easy payments of 49.95.
Just think of the uses. Decoding bull# on ATS, great for birthdays, christmas is just around the corner, and an excellent conversion piece at parties.
Over to you captain midnight...
Ha ha, thanks captain midnight... Mmmm Ovaltine..
That's right, if you order your rocket powered 2012 bull# decoder ring now. I'll throw in a bottle of ovaltine, but not just any ovaltine. I'll throw
in a genuine space grade astronaut ovaltine serving, circa 1960. Anything that old has got to be good for you. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
ACT NOW!!!!
Just call 555-555-5555, have your name, serial number, theoretical credit card, social security number, address, birthday, how tall you are, whether
you're susceptible to any diseases and place your order with one of our many out of country operators.
Remember folks, Illumicorp loves you. Have a nice day.
edit on 3-12-2012 by Hijinx because: (no reason given)
edit on
3-12-2012 by Hijinx because: (no reason given)
Speaking just as a member here, I figure you're right.
I hope no-one actually thinks you're serious. That would be scary!
Anyone who does think you're serious needs the all-new "I'm just kidding" decoder ring, also available from the same trustworthy
organization that all those other totally genuine and definitely working decoder rings come from.