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''Godzone's supremacy'' (Some strange stuff going on here)

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posted on Apr, 26 2003 @ 08:04 AM

''Godzone's supremacy''
Printed on Tuesday, April 22, 2003 @ 18:15:10 CST

By Lance Broughton Columnist (New Zealand)

( In the international struggle for financial supremacy, Godzone (New Zealand) is largely ignored by those who rule the world. They think we're a tiny, insignificant country snoozing in the sun of South Pacific complacency.

But Godzone has flourished dramatically in recent years. On the 24th April 2003, we finally reached a massive four million inhabitants. Being a dyed in the wool Kiwi, I've done my bit by having a number of wives and many children. I always returned the wives afterwards, so kids were my main contribution.

Now that Godzone has a population advantage, we're ready to take over the world by storm. For a coalition partner, we've persuaded nearby Norfolk Island (pop. 1300) to assist. This means our combined military will be invincible. We will bomb and invade any country we find suitable and will make sure that our corporations organize the rebuilding and profit immensely from liberating their natural resources from tyranny.

Make no mistake. Godzone has the qualifications to achieve world domination. We started learning aggression in the 1970s by privatizing the Bank of New Zealand, NZ Railways, Air New Zealand, the Post Office's telephones, the Electricity Department and many other publicly owned assets.

This was the beginning of the multinational corporatization of Godzone. "It's the only way to go," screamed the business gurus. "The world's a global market and we've got to be competitive." Business schools sprang up overnight and suburban accountants found themselves dictating to the business leaders who managed to avoid jail. The accountants' numbers game was the only thing that mattered. It worked well and the thousands of people who found themselves unemployed were written off as collateral damage. The sole talking point was "profit."

Inexperience and incompetence ruled and the Bank of New Zealand went bust in the late eighties; the government had to step in. Australian interests now own the once proud flagship.


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