Journey Through an NDE

I was really moved to write this thread for everyone after seeing the Breedlove video that circulated on ATS this week. I was waiting for ATS Live this week because I thought it might be a topic and I wanted to call in, but I forgot it was the New Year's show, so I will just tell my story here. Enjoy!

I was seventeen years old and involved in a terrible accident involving a severe blow to my head. First, I saw black.


I was no longer connected to my body. This was not like an out of body experience where one would see ones self from above. This was my awareness, my soul, my essence completely checking out of the physical vehicle. So now if you can imagine having your eyes closed, yet no feeling in the rest of your body, while feeling completely whole all the while, that is where I was at.

It was like this for some incalculable amount of time that felt like an eternity and a split second all at once. Second, I saw white.


It was a blinding light. It came at me from a distance, as a pin point, and then grew to engulf my entire field of "vision", or better yet, field of awareness. The effect was like that of going down a rabbit hole with a light at the bottom. As the White fully encased my vision I felt a quickening sensation. One might could describe this as flying, but it didn't feel -quite- like that. It felt more like being flung without any choice full speed into infinity.

When the white had completely consumed me, the feeling of inertia ceased. I felt a peaceful stillness, suddenly all was black again. Next, I saw a Rainbow.


An enormous Rainbow, the kind you would see in a children's book. I would describe it as a road, or a bridge. It was not an arc like you would usually picture one to be. At first it was far away, surrounded by blackness. As I slowly approched, it got larger. I felt incredibly attracted to it, almost like I knew I needed to get to it. I felt in all of my being "The answer lies over the rainbow". I was distinctly urged by another entity that I could not see, hear, or name...only feel...to "Go over". I felt resistance, but I wanted to go so bad. I kept pushing, mentally, to get closer to it.

I struggled but slowly it was so close all of the colors filled my entire vision except for a sliver of black at the top. Everything slowed down to what I can only describe as bullet speed, until I reached the climax. Really. The Climax. As I reached the the blackness to "Over" everything became incredibly fast , it is hard for me to explain how much happened in this moment...when nothing really happened. It was blackness, the rainbow dropped away. Simultaneously I was filled with a soul shaking exstacy that vibrated through my entire being. It was as if every cell in my essence had experienced...for lack of a better word...an orgasm. I felt I had broken through to this other side.

I was experiencing some sort of free fall during all of this, however it is hard to pin point any direction that I was travelling in because, well, there was no direction. It is hard for me to imagine now, even after experiencing it personally, how it could be that one would FEEL so much, yet only have awareness mentally with no physical. From this alone I can assure you that after death you will feel completely as you do now, whole, even without a body. Next, the Sea.


Slowly, one...then two....then four...and on, stars lit up in my vision. They were far away, very tiny. They twinkled white at first, then as they grew in number and I felt I was getting closer, there were colors. Colors I have never seen, colors I love, colors I am familiar with. At first it was like looking at the sky, but as became one with this sea, it was more like a translucent river of stars and colors, they would breathe and undulate. They seemed to be as one. They all interacted together like an ocean, with a tide, with waves...rising and falling lazily in space.

I became aware of my place among them, I floated and relaxed. The most important thing in this place was the feeling of bliss. I can only describe it as the feeling that comes right after climax, that unique relief and relaxation where nothing in the world matters. The only thing different about this was the feeling never waned, it stayed constant. It was the feeling of falling asleep on a summer's day on a hammock in the light of a warm sun. It was the feeling of drawing your child close to you out of love. It was the feeling of seeing a loved one for the first time in a long time. It was all good feelings, and it was ever present in this place.

I felt like I would stay in this place for eternity. I felt a welcoming. I felt awareness around me, I certainly did not feel alone. I felt that same entity again say "You can stay here as long as you want". I wanted to stay. I never wanted to leave. I had been searching for this my whole life, why had I searched for this on Earth? I didn't care about any of that at the time though. All I cared about was this sea of energies. I felt the entity start to explain, "This is the source", I watched the sea glitter, then I saw the colors change.

The colors went from many to few. One section of the sea turned Purple and Pink, the other Blue and Green. These two felt seperated, yet still one. They danced together, rolling around on top of each other, it felt as if they were making love. I realized, this was love. This was a sea of nothing but love energy. This was "Heaven". "Everyone is connected to the source. We come from the source, we return to the source" I heard, in a feeling kind of way.

Then this entity dropped the final few words on me. "You cannot return to where you were if you stay". Suddenly everything that I had forgotten, friends, family, physical pleasure, future goals, flooded into my awareness. What I was seeing and where I was had not changed, but I remembered that I was someone before this, and that someone had a life.

Surprisingly, I still did not want to go. I became saddened at my dilemma, I felt the sea grow further away from me. I sunk lower into sadness, the final straw was the thought of the love I had for my boyfriend at the time. The entity seemed to sigh in amusement, "You can return later". The moment I had accepted this answer, I began to rewind through my experience. Backwards I went, over the rainbow, to the blackness, back up through the rabbit hole.

I hit another patch of blackness and an enormous figure 8 appeared before me. As I got closer to it I could see that it was a running line of this life's experience. The figure was sideways, and made up of clips, like running videos, of different phases in my life. My birth and conception was at one end, with my elderly years at the other. I had a distinct feeling this entire thing had been played out millions of times before.


I was suddenly crashing at uncontrollable speed towards these events, I felt like I had some control over where I would land, but not total control. In those moments I knew my entire life story, and I tried to pick a place in the loop to return to that I liked. Finally I got down to one screen and entered.

I awoke to being resuscitated, surrounded by relieved medical staff and my family. The first face my eyes focused on was my boyfriend's. He still remembers that moment to this day.

I opened my mouth and said

"Here? This time? Seriously?" I scoffed in disgust and closed my eyes.

I have always felt, ever since that day, that I picked the wrong time to come back to. I felt like I truly could have gone forward or backward in the line. I recovered just fine from the accident.

At no point in my experience did I come in contact with any kind of traditional religious figure. Afterward I was moved to research the collective consciousness, energy, reincarnation, and the afterlife. I held no particular religious beliefs prior to it, other than being raised devoutly Christian which I had abandoned in my early teens. I began to identify with Pantheism as the closest thing to what I experienced, and despite the lack of religious presence in my experience I still consider it a religious experience.

I may have blown this off as an incredibly odd dream, if I hadn't had another NDE a few years later that went EXACTLY as this one, only my time spent in the sea of energy was not as long because I was familiar with it and wanted to return.

What I would share with everyone, is that I do not fear death, and I do not think that you should fear it either. That is all, I hope you enjoyed the story

Beautiful... can hardly wait. Thanks for the preview. I am sure that mine will be slightly different than yours... and the same overall. We are slightly different and unique at the same time. I have seen glimpses but never a full blown preview like yours. Thanks for sharing.

Amazing story, thank you for sharing.

S+F

reply to post by ValentineWiggin

Very,good graphical describtion.
Thx for sharing!


o gotta go sleep now, its 04:33h here.
bye!

I often toy with the idea that everyone's experience might be different. I have had conversations with others who have experienced NDE's. There are a few points that they all usually agree with, the overwhelming blissful feeling, the see of lights or energy. There are other areas that are different. Some see their life "Flash" before their eyes first, then go on to the sea..the time line of events is usually off. It is fascinating

Reading these kind of stories, always makes me feel like I should just kill myself and get it over with. (calm down, calm down, I would never do that to my friends and family)

But really, isnt it kinda sad, when a person cant wait to experience death?

reply to post by ValentineWiggin


What a coincidence, I've been reading a book about what happens to the soul after death. A lot of the things you described are in the book. The book is called Survival of the Soul by Lisa Williams. She's a medium that had a show called Living Among the Dead.

I find this subject facinating. You have been given a glimpse of what we can expect upon our physical death. Your NDE experience is a comfort for those who fear death.

Thank you for this Valentine. You brought tears to my eyes.

There is some hope then.

That ocean of stars, many different colors, brought a recognition, though I see entering many worlds there. Any reality we wish. Each orb/star/spirit/soul varies in size and grade level. But we tend to conceptualize on many different levels, that is only touching the surface.

The figure 8 reminds me of Ground hog day, the movie. But as all things hang in infinity forever, its like a recording forever there. And time travel is selecting the reel of film and clip, as there is no time.

The rainbow part was wonderful. I hope I see a rainbow bridge. Many people report initially fading to dark. It reminds me of Tobuscus videos where he says, fade to black ness, to red ness, to white ness. Even my friend who shared his nde said that was the initial, but for some they don't remember the exit, its almost instantly out, the journey part, isn't there, its more instantly in the next scene and so on, though most still see this light. My son was out of his body instantly like that.

And the White Room. Well, the closest I got to this was spontaneous, in a meditation. When my friend was sending me videos on infinity and I had looked inside, with my psi, it was like the zen moment where without thinking, no conscious overlay you quickly spontaneously reach inside, and in that split partial second, slide between the programming, to my Higher Self, who greeted me like an individual who I could have sat at the table and spoke too.

Shortly after this he encouraged a meditation. This wasn't my long form, lie down, listen to hemisync and attempt astral or lucid imaging, or just go zen mind after prayer like I always do. But instead, I was sitting up at the computer closed my eyes, pictured flying through the cosmos, like he suggested, growing bigger and bigger. Well spontaneously I became this scene, it became real, almost lucid, and I was suddenly standing on top of a poster, unable to get back in, it was hard surface, poster of the universe. And I didn't want to wake up, so gently attempted to reset my thoughts to flying again.

And this time, a light being, blond angelic light being, male, pointed upwards and I existed this trap door in the universe yet again out of it.

And in this White landscape that stretched forever it seemed. I thought of it like a half way house. It had colors, but they were muted and overhwelmed by White. That may have been my version of the White room.

Mine was in a town square with a fountain, wise teachers, Christ, but off to the side. This wonderful Old Man with a humble sense of humor came up and asked me what I learnt in this life and was about to do a review, when I decided its time to wake up.

Also, this was the same Old Man that my then 18 year old son, experienced with me, beause we had been discussing Infinity as a concept, and gotten into quite an interesting think tank on it. And when I kept saying, why why, just saying because it is that way is just a cop out, there has to be a reason, we both experienced a vision of this Old Man stepping out of the sky laughing with delight over our problem, like it came to me it was delightful to find the students tackling such a thing.

In any case I'd caught my son out in a shared vision, because when he laughed, my son shot straight up. Looked completely astounded. I tested him by saying simply, He Laughed! And my son nodded.

I have to add this guy, he's so funny. He also puts alot of dark plans or sees the codes in the games.


www.youtube.com...

Journey through "A" NDE .... not "AN" , An is used before vowels or weak sounding H's

reply to post by ValentineWiggin


Thank you for sharing this very personal experience Valentine.

You're probably aware of the extensive study of this field by doctors like Greyson, Ring, Long, Sabom, Van Lommel and Parnia, to name few. The similarity of accounts is incredibly striking and I believe that those who share their experiences are doing a great service to humanity.

I have a question. You mention traveling at great speed. You also mention that death isn't something to fear. I have a terrible fear of speed and motion. I can get really sick going on the tamest of amusement park rides. Based on what you have experienced what do you think dying would be like for someone with pronounced motion sickness?

I was reading an NDE account in a book by Dr. Van Lommel last night. The person described the journey to the light as taking place in a tunnel with other beings. The person also indicated they could see a tunnel with beings traveling in the opposite direction, which in retrospect, made him/her give consideration to the concept of reincarnation.

I found this interesting because in one past life account, see Barra Boy on YouTube, the child describes his past life and then indicates that he arrived in the present life by falling through a tunnel.

Interesting stuff. Thank you again for sharing.

reply to post by ValentineWiggin


wow, what an amazing experience. thank you so much for sharing that.
so you 'saw' no one?
and i take it you didn't recognize the voice?
excellent descriptions btw. very encouraging.

Originally posted by Reaching
reply to post by ValentineWiggin

 

Based on what you have experienced what do you think dying would be like for someone with pronounced motion sickness?

I honestly cannot see how you would have a problem with motion sickness. You are unaware of your physical body, at least I was, so things that might upset a weak stomach would have no affect in my opinion.
I am terrified of the dark, and terrified of heights. Neither of these scared me in my experience, and those issues exist within the mind which I was plenty aware of. I'd say the near death experience in and of itself is a pretty calming experience overall. Great question

Originally posted by ZeroUnlmtd
Journey through "A" NDE .... not "AN" , An is used before vowels or weak sounding H's

I hesitated between A and AN, thanks for clearing that up. Star for you, apparently a much better student than I was!

Originally posted by Unity_99
That ocean of stars, many different colors, brought a recognition, though I see entering many worlds there. Any reality we wish. Each orb/star/spirit/soul varies in size and grade level. But we tend to conceptualize on many different levels, that is only touching the surface.

The figure 8 reminds me of Ground hog day, the movie. But as all things hang in infinity forever, its like a recording forever there. And time travel is selecting the reel of film and clip, as there is no time.

The rainbow part was wonderful. I hope I see a rainbow bridge. Many people report initially fading to dark. It reminds me of Tobuscus videos where he says, fade to black ness, to red ness, to white ness. Even my friend who shared his nde said that was the initial, but for some they don't remember the exit, its almost instantly out, the journey part, isn't there, its more instantly in the next scene and so on, though most still see this light. My son was out of his body instantly like that.

And the White Room. Well, the closest I got to this was spontaneous, in a meditation. When my friend was sending me videos on infinity and I had looked inside, with my psi, it was like the zen moment where without thinking, no conscious overlay you quickly spontaneously reach inside, and in that split partial second, slide between the programming, to my Higher Self, who greeted me like an individual who I could have sat at the table and spoke too.

Shortly after this he encouraged a meditation. This wasn't my long form, lie down, listen to hemisync and attempt astral or lucid imaging, or just go zen mind after prayer like I always do. But instead, I was sitting up at the computer closed my eyes, pictured flying through the cosmos, like he suggested, growing bigger and bigger. Well spontaneously I became this scene, it became real, almost lucid, and I was suddenly standing on top of a poster, unable to get back in, it was hard surface, poster of the universe. And I didn't want to wake up, so gently attempted to reset my thoughts to flying again.

And this time, a light being, blond angelic light being, male, pointed upwards and I existed this trap door in the universe yet again out of it.

And in this White landscape that stretched forever it seemed. I thought of it like a half way house. It had colors, but they were muted and overhwelmed by White. That may have been my version of the White room.

Mine was in a town square with a fountain, wise teachers, Christ, but off to the side. This wonderful Old Man with a humble sense of humor came up and asked me what I learnt in this life and was about to do a review, when I decided its time to wake up.

Also, this was the same Old Man that my then 18 year old son, experienced with me, beause we had been discussing Infinity as a concept, and gotten into quite an interesting think tank on it. And when I kept saying, why why, just saying because it is that way is just a cop out, there has to be a reason, we both experienced a vision of this Old Man stepping out of the sky laughing with delight over our problem, like it came to me it was delightful to find the students tackling such a thing.

In any case I'd caught my son out in a shared vision, because when he laughed, my son shot straight up. Looked completely astounded. I tested him by saying simply, He Laughed! And my son nodded.

I have to add this guy, he's so funny. He also puts alot of dark plans or sees the codes in the games.

www.youtube.com...

edit on 2-1-2012 by Unity_99 because: (no reason given)

Thank you for those

I love your story, I can't imagine getting all that out of meditation alone. What a wonderful relationship you and your son must have, that is absolutely inspiring!

I actually have not found anyone who shares the rainbow experience with me (That I have talked to in person). I meant to mention your thread Journey over the Rainbow www.abovetopsecret.com...
I happened upon your thread when I was searching for NDE experiences that involved rainbows, although it is not quite about that I found the content of it amazing, you did a great job there!

Originally posted by horseplay
reply to post by ValentineWiggin

 

wow, what an amazing experience. thank you so much for sharing that.
so you 'saw' no one?
and i take it you didn't recognize the voice?
excellent descriptions btw. very encouraging.

I "saw" no one. I recognized it in the way of when I felt it, I knew it to be a Higher Being of some sort. My second NDE actually, I became aware of a sort of "Council" of these higher beings, and the one who was assigned to my particular essence. I can't name it, I can barely recall the impression of the appearance I got from it. Whatever it is (I would say my assigned Higher Being) is intensely familiar with me, and I am comfortable with the presence of it extremely.

Originally posted by ValentineWiggin

Originally posted by ZeroUnlmtd
Journey through "A" NDE .... not "AN" , An is used before vowels or weak sounding H's

I hesitated between A and AN, thanks for clearing that up. Star for you, apparently a much better student than I was!

Actually, "an" NDE is correct. In this case, the N is pronounced like "en" instead of "no" or "nice", so you use "an" instead of "a".

Anyway, interesting story. I've always been on the border of believing in NDEs, but I don't buy the hallucination theory. I wonder why people experience different NDEs. I wonder what mine will be like.

Originally posted by needlenight
Reading these kind of stories, always makes me feel like I should just kill myself and get it over with. (calm down, calm down, I would never do that to my friends and family)

But really, isnt it kinda sad, when a person cant wait to experience death?

Patience, patience. You only get to arrive there if you wait it out here until "your time". No "cutting in line", K?