My genuine fear of flying and my plea for help to you ATS.

Hello ATS,

how are you doing today? This is really hard for me but i'll give it a try.

I have a problem... Well it's not really a problem, it's annoying me because I feel alive when I travel and I can't get anywhere without flying.

My girlfriend and I are going to Croatia in one week from now, her parents are driving us there by car.
We have to get back by plane, bus or train. They are staying a month and we have to go back after two delicious weeks of sunshine and beach(and the Bosnian pyramids I really want to visit the place and see it with my own eyes) because we have to work and go to school again.

I have flown more then 12 times, I went to places in Europe and China.

I want to fly around the world and discover everything. A couple of years ago we had to go home(Home=Holland btw), we were in Dubrovnik(Croatia). There was a big fire going on everywhere around us on our way to the airport.

It looked like WW3 was going off all around us, flames that were 100 meters high. Complete mountains that were on fire. There was only one road to the airport, and we had to wait for the clear signal that was given by the fire department every 10 to 15 minutes. We arrived at the airport and it was dark as night even though it was not that late in the day, the air was filled with these small burning particles and the wind was blowing like a freak.

Inside the terminal we started drinking and I started noticing everything like in a movie, the sounds of the wind, the faces on the people around me. I was getting a strange sensation in my body that something was about to go wrong. We boarded the airplane and the wind was so strong that the plane shifted sideways wile standing still on the runway ready for take off. It was very scary, plane took off and after one minute or so we felt a big bump and the plane fell out off the sky. People screaming and the sound of the engine turning off and on like crazy. The lights were flickering and stuff that was on the floor came flying in front of my face. It was just like in the movies only I was there in it.

This continued for some time when it leveled again only to fall again...



I remember my famous last words and they were stupid as hell, "I KNEW IT!!".

The plane leveled again and the captain said some stuff about turbulence but that was no turbulence.. Until this day we do not know what happened.

And I am afraid of getting in a plane now, I have these crazy thoughts that it will happen just because I am in the plane. I have these dreams about planes falling apart in the sky. I see me dying in every way possible during a flight. Wings falling off is the worst I must say..

Now we have to get back and the only option is by bus or by train. But the distance is so huge, by train it take you a whole day just to get back and by bus is 12 hours of hell.

I really want to fly again.. I really do and I have the feeling my girlfriend is disappointed in me because I don't want to fly anymore... She is really pushing it sometimes.. That her mom thinks I am no good just because I fear flying and all that crazy stuff. Not that I really care what her mom thinks but it hurts me to see her get hurt with my fear of flying. I want to, I am not afraid when I look at planes I am not afraid of any thing else.. I think it's more a fear of dying,,

I really need help..

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

- President Franklin D. Roosevelt

Well he did not experience what I did in that plane, but he is right.

Now I know all the statistics how safe it is and all that stuff, I have read a lot about it but nothing seems to help.

I really want to conquer my fears.

"I owned the world as I flew over it..."

- Charles A. Lindbergh

Does anyone have some tips for me to help my fear of flying and/or dying(or loosing control).


I don't want to be stuck in this little part of the world for the rest of my life..

Thank you.

hi op

wen i was a kid my foster parents took us on holiday mainly to spain
i loved the plane journey and the excitement of taking of

then many years later i was at work and the twin towers came on the news on the radio
since then ive been afraid to fly
dont be pushed into something that feels wrong
stick to your guns so to speak

Valium.....

Well there is less chance of getting into an accident while flying than driving but the stat they usually don't tell you is that the fatality rate is considerably higher for those accidents.

If you have a doctor and explain your problem I'm sure he'll give you something very potent to knock you out otherwise I would suggest drinking to the point of blacking out before you board.

Other than that you can try long term medicine and therapy but if you only have a mental problem with flying I would just address that issue when it comes up.

reply to post by sevensheeps


If you allow your fear to control you, you have effectively put a nail in one foot and all you will be doing is going in circles.

If you can afford it, maybe you can take flying lessons. That may help.

Originally posted by kro32
Well there is less chance of getting into an accident while flying than driving but the stat they usually don't tell you is that the fatality rate is considerably higher for those accidents.

Way to reassure someone dude!!

I do not like flying, but just try to treat it as a coach trip. Also, whilst in the air ask if you can visit the Cockpit, I don't know what the policies are now regarding this, but it helped me in my earlier experiences of flying.

I hope you get to travel.

Originally posted by kro32
Well there is less chance of getting into an accident while flying than driving but the stat they usually don't tell you is that the fatality rate is considerably higher for those accidents.

If you have a doctor and explain your problem I'm sure he'll give you something very potent to knock you out otherwise I would suggest drinking to the point of blacking out before you board.

Other than that you can try long term medicine and therapy but if you only have a mental problem with flying I would just address that issue when it comes up.

Just to clarify it was no turbulence, fell sideways and downwards... So statistically I am a lucky man.

I'll try the doctor, but here in Holland (at least my doctor) they don't give you 'drugs' that fast.

But it is something I actually didn't even think off.

Like I said, I know the statistics..

I also wanted to do do a course at a Dutch institute called VALK.

But it will cost me 1000 euros.. And I izz a poor student.

About the drinking I heard it will make it even worse, but the doctor tip is something I will try tomorrow.

Thank you for that, are there any pilot's on ATS? Does anyone know a good Ebook about it or video?

reply to post by TDawgRex


The flying lessons are a good idea to, I was considering something like that until I saw how expensive they are. But definitely something I want to do.


You know I don't want fear to control me.

I am really thinking about taking a plane back it's just the stupid fear is holding me back and almost forcing me to take a 22 hour train ride.. Even though the scenery is going to be beautiful, it rides next to the ocean and trough the mountains. But it's just to long, it takes the plane little under two hours..

reply to post by davesmart


I am not afraid of terrorists.

You should not be, I am afraid of bad spare parts. Low budget airliners that have to cut cost in maintenance in oder to survive.

A little paranoid shall we say..

reply to post by loves a conspiricy


On a two hour flight? Does it really help? How much do I need to take? I am about 85 kilo's and I am in a good condition in spirit and body.

What you experienced was turbulence -- planes can handle turbulence. The engine changing speeds is the pilot. or the computer adjusting power. Sometimes it is disconcerting -- planes have redundant systems. They can fly on one engine there are procedures for every problem imaginable. Sometimes and only very rarely - they crash. You really do have a better chance of dieing on the way to the airport than in a plane crash.

I have flown commercial since the 60s 1000s of business flights. 1 time we returned to the airport because of an out of bounds reading on an engine instrument. 1 time had a flat on landing both times the planes were able to return to the gate. In the 80s I owned a C150 a 1500lb airplane - I circumnavigated the US with that plane -- never a mishap.

I think the reason most people are frightened of flying is that they are uncomfortable with the movements or the sounds. Airplanes are big thing they make big sounds. They move about - sometimes violently -- they are however designed to make those movements. The engines change speeds for many many reasons. The plane changes attitudes for many different reasons. Computers watch everything, and actually do a good share of the flying and navigation.

Perhaps you should attend a ground school. All of the theory of flight none of the actual flying.

The AOPA has some programs. You might even learn to fly -- The earth can be absolutely beautiful from the air.

www.aopa.org...

Some airlines also have offered programs for fear of flying (might not now with the tight revenue)

You might want to go to an airport and take an introductory lesson. You would get sit in the pilots and actually control a plane -- it isnt that difficult.

I have always found the daemons you know are far less scary then the ones you imagine.

Good luck - Don't worry

reply to post by Cobaltic1978


How do you clear your mind then? I really hope so to..

reply to post by spyder550



But you still call it turbulence when you are upside-down and falling sideways?

I know flying is safe..I just it made such a huge impact on me..

I love airplanes, I have been in love with them since I was a kid.

Thank you for your post I will look at the link provided.

And I will look at this ground schooling. Never heard of it, but it really sounds like it can help me!


much love for the love


And thank you

Originally posted by sevensheeps
reply to post by loves a conspiricy

 

On a two hour flight? Does it really help? How much do I need to take? I am about 85 kilo's and I am in a good condition in spirit and body.

My mother is terrified of flying....she takes 10mg Valium in the lounge, by the time she gets on the plane she couldnt care less if it fell out of the sky in a huge fireball lol.

I can understand totally where you're coming from. After doing a sky-dive (jumping from a plane at 10,000 feet) 10 years ago I developed an irrational fear of flying. My fear got so bad that I actually made a will for the first time in my life prior to a holiday which included 5 different flights.

I don't really know how but I managed to get over it - one thing I did do was regularly check incoming/outgoing flights at the airports here in the UK - if you can get into your head the sheer number of planes in the air all over the world at any one time this may help you understand how safe it is... I know it helped me....

As someone has suggested, valium will help or maybe a few shots of something strong Also, practicing breathing exercises will help you keep calm.

Also, check out Amazon for self-help books on the subject, there are lots available - check the recommendations of other readers...

I really hope you manage to get over this, good luck!

reply to post by loves a conspiricy


My English humor friend

You think that is sufficient for me, I mean the amount your mother takes? I have no idea cause I have never taken any valium.

Heya,

Well Im a pilot that was just passing through this website, saw this page and decided to join just to answer your question!

Turbulence is just pockets of air. The very cause of it was what you described on your drive into the airport. Fire. Or more to the point. Heat.
If the fire was as big as you claimed it was, then it would have produced a hell of a lot of heat. Which causes rapidly rising air and a lot of turbulence. There would have been air going in all different directions causing both horizontal and vertical windshear which would have knocked the plane around a lot.

The engine noise would be from as mentioned before, the pilots or the autopilot adjusting the power to suit as the airspeed would have been going crazy.

Turbulence is like hitting holes in the road. The drops and knocks may be violent but you will not fall from the sky. You may fall for a few hundred feet in worst case scenarios, but it won't drop out of the sky.

Aviation is very safe. People try to say that you have more chance of dying in a aircraft accident than a road accident, that maybe true as cars are not doing 300kph when they have their accident. BUT, you are more likely to be IN an accident in a car than an aircraft.

reply to post by paradisepurple


You developed a fear of flying after a skydive??

I would think that it would be a insta cure but I guess I am wrong.

What kind of breathing exercises are you talking about?

Peace

reply to post by lilflyboy


Well I think you could be right, I mean air is like water right? (for a plane) And the ocean is not smooth either.

But yeah we flew over the fires and then over the ocean. it was from Dubrovnik airport and the whole area looked like the apocalypse.

So thank you for singing up just to answer my question, very kind of you!

But as a pilot I would like to ask you, how aware are pilots of their aircraft. I mean do they check them out before flight? Are they maintained before every take off?

Peace

Before every flight a pilot conducts a walk around of their aircraft. The engineers turn up and check out the flight logs and conduct any maintence required for flight.
Before start the usually run through as many of the systems as they can, then on the taxi out after start up they check the rest.

Trust me, I enjoy living as much as you do, and I'm not going to take something up into the air thats going to put MY life and career in danger. Let alone everyone elses. Perhaps its a selfish way to look at it, but its also safe!