Has anyone here gone through something traumatic in their past, and find themselves struggling to win a battle with their 'inner demon'???
The demon is an emotional content that prevents us from letting go. It compels our ego to look at it. Focus on it, and by doing so, strengthen it. The
fly to me is the literal physical manifestation of this emotional process. I can not think of it as anything other then a "fly", swarming around my
head, distracting my 'consciousness' from the liberation of self awareness.
Anyways. I remember reading Jung once where he said in his experience, people dont 'defeat' their problems by opposing them head on, but rather, by
growing beyond them. The problem begins to dissipate not because of any mental 'trick', but because their consciousness has expanded beyond the
complex's range of influence....
Im not anywhere up there, although i can definitely see myself as having made great strides over the last few years. Ive had many so called
'cathartic' experiences; where the pain of a particular situation, and the bounds it forced me to cling to, amazingly had the effect of making me
mentally stronger. I know this is what people have always said, and it makes total sense when analyzed rationally, yet its one thing to hear it said
and understand it, and another to experience it, and see it happening before your conscious mind. In this way it is completely mystical, meaningful
But at the same time, theres the fear, and the paranoia of not being able to 'live' beyond the hell that the complex arrests you to. It plays tricks
with you; it throws thoughts and ideas into your mind, and if it gets you atleast once, it can have you thinking all sorts of strange and frightful
thoughts. Can i deal with not "struggling" with it? I have become identified with it. It has possessed me. I feel a pressure to listen.....
All in the end is rooted on proper knowledge. Proper knowledge brings us to truth, and as the saying goes "the truth will set you free" . Truth
presents to the ego a new reality; the true reality. It sets before us how things actually are, and beckons us to believe. If we believe and have
faith in it, were set free. Were affixed to the G-d of reality, to the infinite creator who exercises complete freedom of will with his creation. Man
can be free, free of conflicting emotions, and free of the exhausting fight with the lower self. He can concentrate on the divine, on the higher
'vision' of truth, and embrace it. After awhile of habituation to this awareness he will 'vibrate', so to say, at a more pure level.
All hinges on belief. Belief, is a wonderous thing. And what greater belief is there then the belief in a living universe? One which knows man, loves
man, and directs man to fullfill his divine purpose. To 'rectify' the creation, as the Kabbalists and Gnostics say.
There is a tremendously mystical awareness of man being 'supported' by the infinite one. The G-d described by the biblical prophets. Not the type
"understood" by fundamentalist christians or promoted in society - an essentially literalist/anti-philosophical attitude - , but rather the inner,
kabbalistic/mystical meaning of the Bible, which conveys the Hebraic philosophical conception of G-d.
This G-d is panentheistic. He is both "In" and "beyond" the world. He is not defined in his being by this worlds phenomena, although the latter help
us know something about Him. This G-d not only reveals himself through "nature", of the physical order, but also personally. G-d created mans reality
as much as he created nature. He imprinted the "ego" in his being, and allowed him the mystery of a personal relationship with His creator. Afterall,
isnt G-d the creator of Reality? And did he not create us as a social creature? With families, monogamous marriages full of personal "ups" and
"downs".. Shouldnt our relationship with reality be based on that? Is that not the deepest idea there is? Can reality truly be unified in any other
way? This world, with its personal relationships, regarded by so many 'mystics' as "incidental" to this world of 'illusion'.
The Hebrews thought differently (no wonder the theosophists Helena Blavatsky and Alice Bailey always spoke disparigingly of the Hebrews/Jews)
According to the Hebraic doctrine, the unique feature of human existence is mans highly refined ability to connect with other human beings, and by
doing so, learn of our source, and understand that how we relate with each other, particularly the man/woman relationship, is an analogy for how
Mankind is meant to relate to G-d. This is what the beautiful Song of Songs is about. The universe/G-d, united with man. G-d will then become
'incarnate' so to speak, in this world, completely united with in every way. With this wonderous level of perception, man would be above nature. His
thoughts - which govern his being - would be able to direct the body. He would be free of constraining emotions. His thoughts, and emotions - his soul
- would be united with the center of all. He would be able to make a mockery of physical laws. He could 'teleport' to wherever his thought envisioned.
The physical would be an exact reflection of his inner being.
This world and the higher world are two aspects of one reality. They are completely at one. The only way to REVEAL that truth is for man to exercize
his freedom of will and agree to believe it. Ignorance creates the separation. Ignorance makes us believe that this world, with its laws of
consistency, are immutably so. The fact that belief is a factor sounds liek a joke. Reality is disjointed because of this doubt. Doubt is the killer
of the soul. Amalek - the 'firstborn of the nations' as the Jewish Talmud says, cryptically refers to the essence of mans situation. Amalek has the
same gematria as the Hebrew word 'Safuk', doubt. The entire narrative in the bible of the Israelites exodus from Egypt, and their being accosted by
"amalek", in the desert, on their way to the holy land, all this refers to the process of self realization.
First one recognizes the 'limits' that this world - Egypt (Miztrayim, Egypt, is the same letters as Mitzarim - limits) - presents. Once aware of this,
he decides to change it. He commits himself to seeing the world in its true state - the holy land - a place of complete repose and inner tranquility.
On his way there he encounters many different things. But the first thing that confronts him is Amalek - the enemy of the Israelites/Jews -
בִּרְפִידִם, at Refidim, which means "shades", referring to the place in the mind where the consciousness meets doubt.
וַיֹּאמֶר מֹשֶׁה אֶל-יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בְּחַר-לָנוּ אֲנָשִׁים, וְצֵא הִלָּחֵם
בַּעֲמָלֵק; מָחָר, אָנֹכִי נִצָּב עַל-רֹאשׁ הַגִּבְעָה, וּמַטֵּה הָאֱלֹהִים,
And Moses - the soul of the soul - says to Joshua, "go out" - become aware of the presence of doubt - "select some men" - muster some energy - "and
fight Amalek" - the doubt.
"Tomorrow i will stand at the top of the hill" - my next act of will will be to be 'above' the presence of doubt - "with the rod of G-d in my hand",
with the strength of the knowledge of G-d at my disposal
וְהָיָה, כַּאֲשֶׁר יָרִים מֹשֶׁה יָדוֹ--וְגָבַר יִשְׂרָאֵל; וְכַאֲשֶׁר יָנִיחַ
יָדוֹ, וְגָבַר עֲמָלֵק.
"When Moses held up his hand, Israel prevailed" - When Moses - the soul - lifted up its gaze towards G-d, he prevails."When he relaxed, Amalek
prevailed". When the soul relaxes, or loses focus on the ultimate, when its mind isnt towards G-d, doubt prevails.
edit on 13-7-2011 by dontreally because: (no reason given)