Understanding How We Affect Even Strangers.

I am writing this thread to share some info concerning how we affect each other, but also how you do not have to physically know someone, or even ever met them. I have no links to post, or any books to add. This is more along the lines of personal day to day.

Even if you dont remember someone doesn't mean that you didn't have an impact on their lives. As a matter of fact you dont have to meet most people and have an impact. You can impact 100 people through one person by word of mouth alone.

Example:
You go to a party and spill a drink on someone. One person will tell another, and another. You have officially become a story in the mind of strangers. Due to this embarrassment, a person that over heard what had happened, is now more careful about how they hold their drink, as not to make the mistake of someone they never met. By your story become conscience in another's mind you may have changed their future (of possibly spilling their own drink) which in turn may have changed their future event.

Now that is only a small example. Here is another and this involves us here on ATS. The same as the above story we share with not only those who post, or chat, but as others discuss this with those outside this group, you then become a part of another's life, without even knowing it. You can either affect people in a positive or negative way. But our form of communication causes us to have a connection that sometimes we dont always see.

If we began to live knowing that each of us is a teacher, no matter the message, we may be more careful of our actions. We are some what connected in a sense that is hard to comprehend. You can even think that something yo said was very small and unimportant, and move past the event. But in actuality you have made an impact on the future decisions of another based on something that may have meant nothing to you.

I try in my life to see ahead of what I do and even when I am purposely being rude, I am aware of the above. I know that my actions, words, emotions, communication, compassion, and love, is fully around me. I cannot take responsibility of how others might react to my actions, but I can be aware that its there.

Peace, NRE

reply to post by NoRegretsEver


well said...

i subscribe to the "ripple-effect" theory!!

in our sea of society, some people can just barely DOG PADDLE,,
some can swim with ease..

me..?? i try not to cause waves...

I didn't mean for this to seem complicated, I do know that some of you got this. Its just a form of opening the mind outside the box.

Peace, NRE.

reply to post by NoRegretsEver

Even if you dont remember someone doesn't mean that you didn't have an impact on their lives. As a matter of fact you dont have to meet most people and have an impact. You can impact 100 people through one person by word of mouth alone.

This is why my favorite English word is Tacit. We should all be aware that our words and actions have more meaning and impact on life than we seem to comprehend. A simple slip of the tongue can introduce a two year old to the "wonderful" world of curse words. Humans are natural copiers, a singer sings an exceptional song and the next day the shoes they wore when they sang it are the latest fad. You meet an "expert" on a subject that wears glasses, now when YOU want to appear smart you don a pair yourself. Nothing is new on this Earth, Everything has been done before and we all effect and copy each other.

If we began to live knowing that each of us is a teacher, no matter the message, we may be more careful of our actions.

Wow, someone who understands the power of just - existing!! Very well said - and I'm glad I saw your post in new topics.

We are ALL teachers, whether we know it or not - there are ears everywhere, and one never knows when one's words might make a difference to someone in future decisions.

Anyone know the "starfish story"? A person is standing on a vast beach that is covered in stranded starfish, picking them up one at a time and throwing them into the surf - a stranger comes by and says: "What are you doing? There are to many of them to make any difference".
The person picks up just one more, and flings it into the surf. Then turns to the stranger and says:

"IT MADE A DIFFERENCE TO THAT ONE"

hear hear!

Thank you for your contribution. I am fully aware that some situations and scenarios would require more or less thinking outside the box, and may actually cause some that dont think about it a reason to ignore it. I have faith in people and what they say, what they present, and what the possibly consequences are.

Peace, NRE.

no other replies??

reply to post by ProphecyPhD


Yeah I know This has been a thread that I thought that many would agree with, but to my dismay it has actually turned into a thread in the shuffle.

Peace, NRE.

That's a good way of thinking.
Kudos to you :]

I thought this was a great thread, and wanted to give it a bump, as it is not a thread that you can really put into a search and get some other threads. This for those that may have missed it.

Peace, NRE.

I agree with the OP's post...but in some ways it can be a disconcerting message because it implies a moral imperative that goes beyond what most people are capable of. Most people are more worried about making it through the day than they are concerned with their roles as teachers of anything at all. To add this responsibility can only be overwhelming for some. It seems that to truly achieve and work on the level the OP is suggesting would be possible only for someone who had been able to satisfy many other, more basic needs first. Just a thought. Anyway, interesting topic.

just wanted to toss these four words into the mix, "i can be wrong". remember that, and you're good to go.

I hope that I had an effect on strangers in my time here on Earth.

Which is why, when I am in public, I go out of my way to help people.
Opening doors, picking up dropped items, yelling at cars driving to fast, etc...
All these things should be done by everyone.

I even yell at those people who leave grocery buggies in the middle of the lot..
That really grinds my gears.

Needless to say, there are numerous things that a person can do to affect someones life.
Good and bad.

Which is why I try to stay positive even while arguing with a person.
All I want is to put a positive spin on people's lives.
Lead by example.


Good thread.
110% agreed.

reply to post by NoRegretsEver
Hiya NRE

I flagged and subscribed to this on the day to remind me to post a great article along similar lines. It's about the Golden Gate Bridge as a place for jumpers. The message is deep stuff...

I read about a man in his 30s who left a note in his apartment that said he would not jump from the Golden Gate Bridge if, on the way to the bridge, he met one person who smiled at him. He jumped.

Just a Smile and a Hello on the Golden Gate Bridge.

Our actions can have such wide repercussions that we never know the half of. If anyone had smiled at this person, he'd still be here. At the same time, his death inspired this article and many people who have read it. It's left such an impression on me that it reaffirmed my belief in personal responsibility to others.

Just last year, there was an old woman of 83 (or 88, not sure) who looked lost. I pulled over and asked if she was OK? Turned out she'd been to her husband's grave and got lost on the way back home. She lived 7/8 miles from there and near to my home so I offered her a lift. It was a lot of fun; we ended up singing 'Show Me the Way to Go Home' as we drove. She told me a couple of stories about where I grew up. As she got out the car, she explained how her daughter had died at age 14 and she'd found her in bed on a school day. Her husband's grave was next to the daughter's and she'd been changing the flowers.

Before I left, she thanked me and said her daughter had sent me to keep her safe. It gave me the goosebumps big time and I've still got a sprig of dried flowers she left in the car.

What struck me (of many things) was her belief in God and her family watching over her. As she walked away, her Faith and beliefs had been confirmed by this one act of kindness. My belief in protecting and/or helping people was made stronger too, so the incident had a positive effect on both of us.

The 'butterfly effect' has so many perspectives and also it takes us back to that one guy who nobody smiled at.