Losing a part of the self?

The other day I was having a conversation with someone who I recently found out I have a lot in common with, and as the year is almost over we were discussing personal growth and things of that nature. So during the conversation we discovered we both experienced something neither of us understood and scoffed at until we realized how odd it seems.

People who have known us for a long time (close friends, relatives, etc) both think we have lost something. However, none of them can pinpoint exactly what we lost. They usually say something along the lines of, "You lost that thing that made you john doe." So it seems as if they desperately want whatever it is to come back even though they don't know what exactly it is or when it went away, they just know that its gone. We both used the same explanation to ourselves which is "oh well, people grow up, people change, get over it." But the more we talked it out the more it started to seem a bit well odd. At this point most of them have given up and accepted the change but some people are convinced we need to find what we lost.

So naturally I am turning to ATS for a fresh perspective.

Originally posted by acmpnsfal

... we need to find what we lost.

What was it that you had?

reply to post by In nothing we trust


virginity?

obligatory second line.

reply to post by In nothing we trust

No clue. Something nobody can really put into words. The closest I got to an answer was "change the world energy"

Originally posted by MeSoCorny
reply to post by In nothing we trust

 

virginity?

obligatory second line.

Innocence?

reply to post by MeSoCorny

That was gone before this happened.
Good answer though.

Originally posted by acmpnsfal
reply to post by In nothing we trust

 

The closest I got to an answer was "change the world energy"

Were you a Hippie?

There's something very Austin Powers about this thread.

reply to post by In nothing we trust

I was not a hippie back then....I was more a anarchist punk angsty teen against anything remotely organized. I would say im more of a hippie now though. And thats partly why none of this makes any sense to me. I mean obviously I do not think the world is a happy place at all, but im not a hateful person either I found a happy balance between the two basically. But somehow I lost something along the way that nobody can really put into words.

Originally posted by acmpnsfal

I lost something along the way that nobody can really put into words.

Is it square?

Is it brown?

Is it hot?

Is it a thought?

reply to post by In nothing we trust

I have no clue I dont feel im missing anything, yet everyone else does. Not saying consensus means its true, but it does make me wonder. meh. Obviously its something non-tangible. So I do not think any of those things describe it. I think I will ask those questions next time it comes up though.

reply to post by acmpnsfal


Shot from the Dark here:

You mentioned you went from an "anarchist punk angsty teen" to now more of a "hippie". Was there a shift in perspective you've recently developed? An understanding or comprehension that may have changed the way you interact with others? Do you feel you've "matured" or "grown up" in some way? Might you have shifted political or economic constructs of thought (i.e. become less "anarchist" and more "freedom seeking")? Have you developed an acceptance or shifted mindsets in the way you perceive society / politics / social norms / cultural norms?

The people that have mentioned this to you, are they a group of people that you used to hang out with and now don't see as much?

Have you gotten into any new relationships (friendships or girl/boy-friend)? Perhaps a new or dropping of old habitual usage?

Answer as you're comfortable to...
Humbly,

W.

I am familiar with the term 'soul piece'.
I was advised that I may have been deprived of a 'soul piece', by voluntarily (but not knowingly) surrendering it to an assailant in order to ensure my physical survival (a past traumatic experience in this life).

I am attempting to learn more by reading -
'Mending the Past and healing the Future with Soul Retrieval' by Alberto Villoldo (a shaman)

Shamans practice rituals to perform such a service.
Allegedly, it is preferable to physically die with a soul complete. If you don't, there will be a delay in the further evolution of your conciousness after physical death, whilst other 'light bodies' help you to regain it.

I am not yet convinced of the validity of the concept.

If anyone here has read more about it, I would welcome their opinion.

reply to post by acmpnsfal


Maybe it is not you that has lost something

lets take love and beauty as an example

“Beauty is within the eye of the beholder”

If your friends cannot no longer see the beauty and love in you or this world .
then yes something is very sadly lost....

best they go look in the mirror of them self and go put back and nurture...within themselves
that which seems to be lacking in others... and stop pointing and blaming others

"Be the change you wish to see "

reply to post by acmpnsfal

My guess is that it has something to do with ego.
Ego pride is never a good thing and is very difficult to get rid of. Over time, through understanding, we can see the fallacy in ego and it slowly begins to lose its grip over us.

you lost your angry rebellious spirit

Now why does it have to be a bad thing with you glass half empty guys? I lost much of my ego and anger after understanding that those that wrong me will burn in hell anyway! There how do you like that.


Really though there are cases where folks see something that was part of you that they knew was a good thing in you. Like the sort of thing people all see in another that attacts folks to that person, a good soul. Then that person is seen later and whiel they have not gone bad.... that spark is gone. Just the regular drag of life can do that to a person over time.

Originally posted by wolfgang1812
reply to post by acmpnsfal

 

Shot from the Dark here:

You mentioned you went from an "anarchist punk angsty teen" to now more of a "hippie". Was there a shift in perspective you've recently developed? An understanding or comprehension that may have changed the way you interact with others? Do you feel you've "matured" or "grown up" in some way? Might you have shifted political or economic constructs of thought (i.e. become less "anarchist" and more "freedom seeking")? Have you developed an acceptance or shifted mindsets in the way you perceive society / politics / social norms / cultural norms?

The people that have mentioned this to you, are they a group of people that you used to hang out with and now don't see as much?

Have you gotten into any new relationships (friendships or girl/boy-friend)? Perhaps a new or dropping of old habitual usage?

Answer as you're comfortable to...
Humbly,

W.

All of the above really, minus the habitual usage (unless cigarettes count). The people who said these things are all over the spectrum which is why I though it was funny. Parent, cousins, aunts, grandparents, friends (mostly old friends but we maintained the same amount of conact), an old mentor...lol. Its really all over the place, or it was when it first came up, its pretty much subsided at this point because people give up after while.

As far as a shift in perspective, all over the place as well. Basically all levels of my thought process of changed on everything. Society, religion, relationships. poltics,, etc. I know I have grown and matured. If not what would be the point of life? Freedom seeking, I was/still am sort of.

reply to post by margaretr

This sounds interesting, I think I will look into whether it does or does not apply to this.

I feel lowest when I feel disconnected. Not disconnected from others around me or stuff in the world but disconnected from those parts of me that I feel make me an individual in a spiritual sense, not just an organism that remembered what it has learned in it's lifetime thus far. Things you can't explain or have no tangible evidence for... just a sense of meaningful individuality that is rooted to the simple idea that you even exist in the first place... that there must be something grand to that notion... but life wears on you, makes you "just another" It somehow escapes me sometimes because when I look around me, nothing I can perceive with my material senses will show proof of it. It is all in my crazy dead little organism head. No stories, no real memories... just numbers that lead to the sum of all things- absolutely nothing.

sorry... I had to actually go there to describe it.
Maybe it's part of your own spirit... maybe the spirit wanders off sometimes... or maybe it's a spirit that is close to you, that has so far effected who you are, who you have been. Maybe sometimes these things are near, maybe sometimes they feel more distant and it actually distances you from a part of yourself. Maybe it's from actual occurrences in your life, the feeling of separation from something... or maybe it's in energies we can't see waxing and waning...sometimes drawing things to us that seem connected to us and sometime the energy pushes things away giving of more of a feeling of disconnection or subtraction from what we are used to.