The Rise Of The Sugar Mama

The Rise Of The Sugar Mama

www.npr.org

...a study by the Pew Research Center finds that there's been a role reversal when it comes to men, women and the economics of marriage.
...
Stephanie Coontz, author of Marriage: A History. Coontz says that in a 1967 poll, two-thirds of women said they'd consider marrying a man they did not love if he had good earnings potential.

"Now, women have a completely different point of view," Coontz says. "They say overwhelmingly — 87 percent — that it's more important to have a man who can communicate well, who can be intimate and who will share the housework than to have someone who

(visit the link for the full news article)

Now how this will play out in the stats/rate of divorces, it's hard to gauge;

With the number of women becoming financially independent, there comes many more opportunities to leave a bad marriage (divorce rates rise), but then these women are also more likely to marry a man based on his inner qualities versus his ability to fill a bank account (divorce rates decrease).

Whatever the effects/outcome will be,
it can only be for the better for this new study reveals that we are evolving...
which leads us to the realization that basically women are men, and visa versa.

www.npr.org
(visit the link for the full news article)

[edit on 19-1-2010 by The Blind Eye]

Wow, I always wondered what it would be like to be kept.

Not that I'll ever find out. My wife has a terrible sense of humor about these sorts of things.

Originally posted by leftystrat
... My wife has a terrible sense of humor about these sorts of things.

Hmmm... curious, why would she take this so seriously?
Perhpas, she's afraid that you would run off with a more financially endowed women? lol

Which prompts me to inquire, should who makes more really matter? And why should men making more than women be used as an excuse for males making all important domestic decisions or visa-versa, since we are on the topic of more and more women becoming the bread winners? ... and back to your post in kin, to be 'kept' does that mean you are obliged to agree/conform to your captor's every wish?

[edit on 23-1-2010 by The Blind Eye]

Originally posted by The Blind Eye
Which prompts me to inquire, should who makes more really matter? And why should men making more than women be used as an excuse for males making all important domestic decisions or visa-versa, since we are on the topic of more and more women becoming the bread winners?

I was outearned initially. Didn't bother me.
Wish I still was but life intervened.

Originally posted by leftystrat
I was outearned initially. Didn't bother me.
Wish I still was but life intervened.

lol... i hear you and feel your pain.

See ladies some of us, if not most/all of us are more then willing to have you take the reigns or at least go 'dutch'... in short, it's no picnic out there

There must be a noticeable shift...
if askmen.com has an article on the subject of how to "Land A Sugar Mama" lol
That covers in practical no-nonsense steps/sections:
Where to find a sugar mama
What to do to attract her
What to talk about
How to seduce her
How to maintain the relationship
Dangers to avoid

www.askmen.com...

Being that the dynamics are new and unfamiliar, such advice is likely sought after and taken seriously by men who are looking to date/marry up. Would be interesting to note how similar or different this strategy/approach is from the typical gold digger's game book.

I'd kill for a sugar momma!

Originally posted by valiant
I'd kill for a sugar momma!

No need, it looks like there are plenty of other options

From a simple/quick google search, these three showed up on the first page:

Have you been trying to find a generous woman benefactor, this is the place. A sugar mama looking to find a sugar baby? A women's boy toy?
shugamama.com

Millionaire Flirt specializes in hooking millionaire singles, sugar daddies, and sugar mommas with those looking for free millionaire dating.
millionaireflirt.com

Sugar Mama Dating Site.
100 % Free Dating Service and Dating Site
seekingsugarmama.com

Which again proves/shows that the playing field is becoming balanced. 'The olderman and the younger woman' cliche will now have it's flip side rival in relation.

[edit on 27-1-2010 by The Blind Eye]

Omg!

I best get in shape and sign myself up!

I think it's important to have an equal share of the work - a woman may make more than the man or vice versa, but each should put in an equal amount of effort into all the things that need to happen to run a household - chores, cooking, cleaning - that goes for successful relationship in the 70s or today.









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reply to post by Tiffany87


I would image that there is a spectrum of possibilities out there in practice... anywhere from a boytoy to a man who stays home to take care of the kids and keep all the domestic business in order. Though i wonder how content the women are with this arrangement.

I have dated and had relationships with men of many income levels, some higher than mine, some lower. When on a date I had a rule of thumb that if the man made the same or less than me we'd go dutch. If he made more I'd sometimes let him pick up the tab.

I had one long-term relationship where I basically supported both of us. Initially I thought he just needed some time to find his niche but when he started to spend all day in bed while I went out and earned the money I was angry. I did (and still do) expect my mate to be an equal partner in most if not all aspects of our life together, and I began to feel like his mother. It became an unequal power situation, and I did not enjoy being the "dominant" one anymore than I can take being submissive.

My present husband's income is higher than mine but not by that much. He has a job with about equal status to mine. We put our earnings together and share most responsibilities equally. For instance, we take turns cooking and the one who doesn't cook that night does the dishes. Sometimes he falls into the "male" role of fixing things while I do more of the housework.

My husband's income was not a factor for me when we were dating. I picked him because I valued his intelligence, shared the same interests, found he was as much an avid reader as I am, is a great listener, accepted and shared responsibilities, and treated me as an equal. I admired the work he did and his selflessness in doing it. Most of all I picked him because he was wonderful to me.

I am very happy in my marriage. Neither one of us is a sugar mama or daddy, and while we do occasionally have power struggles we communicate well for the most part.

reply to post by The Blind Eye


Being a member of saloon society, I had the opportunity to meet and enjoy relationships with a couple of financially well endowed women.
[Santa Fe/Taos is a prime spot for rich widows and divorcées from Texas and Oklahoma looking to experience a Bohemian lifestyle] What sweet, generous, wonderful women they were to allow me to pursue my Art and music and not have to worry about making a living.

But it has been my experience that the cultural differences between hippies and the country club set are not really conducive to long term relationships. However we have stayed close friends and lovers, but Alas, as I have grown older, bald and overweight my keptman days are long gone.





[edit on 4-3-2010 by whaaa]

reply to post by The Blind Eye


I'll tell you mate these researches will come and go but "women" are such a mystery that they will never be solved or understood.

reply to post by The Blind Eye


We are evolving? Oh yeah? Our kids are a disaster because their parents are too busy working, specifically their moms are too busy trying to prove themselves to society. Look women and men are not equal and were never meant to be. I don't care what anyone says kids are meant to grow up in an environment where they are loved by a mother and a father. Meaning women and men who take on the role of mother and father are giving their kids something that ALL KIDS and children need in order to grow into adults keyword HEALTHY ADULTS psychologically and physically. Look at our kids nowadays? They are spoiled, unhealthy physically and emotionally, hypersexual etc. What does it even mean to be a mother nowadays? We've turned the most important occupation into an annoyance and trivial part of life. Mothering and nurturing and guiding children is the most important thing in life in my opinion.

Hey, Blind Eye. Then there's the Sugar Mama on paper. The couple both worked outside the home, but since he was considered "self-employed", the accountant most years zeroed out his income for tax purposes. Come divorce time, because most years he showed zero income on his tax forms, he ended up with the house, half of the savings (which came from her income), AND he petitioned for and received alimony, even though, except on paper, he was taking home an income!

When she wrote his monthly alimony check, she wrote in large red letters on the memo line, FOR ALIMONY. He complained to her about it and told her not to write it, because it was embarrassing lol.

reply to post by Zosynspiracy



But not equal?


Or is it that you meant the traditional roles are needed. Both parents and their roles are equally important, just different.

It is proven that men have a profound effect in their children's lives. The impact is felt even more if the father is absent.

Lets also not forget that also according to our isolationist society, that we expect everyone to live seperately in their own homes without the assistance of family and friends.

If you look at most other societies,the families live together. All the women and men pitch in to raise the children. There is always someone there. So parents get breaks and social time they need.

As opposed to everyone living seperately and working themselves to death trying to do it all themselves.

Originally posted by whaaa
reply to post by The Blind Eye

 

Being a member of saloon society, I had the opportunity to meet and enjoy relationships with a couple of financially well endowed women. ... What sweet, generous, wonderful women they were to allow me to pursue my Art and music and not have to worry about making a living.

Whaaa... you are my hero.

Does give a whole new meaning to 'supporting the arts'... the kind of support i think i could learn to embrace lol

reply to post by desert


I'm sure there are such cases as you have described, not any different then what we more commonly see with women getting alimony checks from their ex/sugar-daddy. In many ways one could draw a parallel between prostitution and marriage... one being off the books and the other on. Many relationships have a financial component ... some more central then others.