There Are No Problems A Law Can't Fix

You got a problem, let Michael Suede fix it.

Lets take kids getting poor grades for example. Little Johny is causing you grief because he doesn't like math? NO PROBLEM!

Elect me as your representative and I'll outlaw poor grades! That little criminal will be behind bars faster than you can say the letter F.

How about drunk driving? Are you sick of all these drunks out on the road at 2:00 AM plowing into each other? Well boy I got the solution. I'll simply create a law banning drunk driving! BOOM! no more drunks!

AMAZING RESULTS!

Hey, you got a problem with homeless people in your neighborhood? I got a solution for that as well. I'll simply make being homeless a criminal offense! BOOM! NO MORE HOMELESS PEOPLE!

You just give me a problem and I'll show you how a law can fix it overnight. I have spent years studying the complexities of law.

Take loosing your job! Hey! EVERYONE NEEDS A JOB RIGHT? I'll just make a law that says if you apply to a job, you get the job! Instantly everyone without a job will have a job. Problem solved.

How about your kid doing drugs? Can't have that now! Doing drugs might ruin Johny's grades, and since getting an F is illegal, that's problematic. PROBLEM-REACTION-SOLUTION MAKE DRUGS ILLEGAL!!! BAM! No more drugs.

Its that simple.

With the stroke of a pen, I can solve drugs, drunk driving, poor grades, homelessness and joblessness overnight.

You people need to better appreciate people like myself, because only someone as enlightened as myself can provide you with such obvious solutions!

Throw your problems at me, I'll write a law on the spot and show you how it can be solved.

The real problem:

We have too many laws.

what happens when we have so many laws that they begin contradict one another? BrEaKdOwN

[edit on 14-1-2010 by Aggie Man]

Originally posted by Aggie Man
what happens when we have so many laws that they begin contradict one another? BrEaKdOwN

[edit on 14-1-2010 by Aggie Man]

Nope, I can create a law for that too!

But lets look at the problem of poor pay.

We all know everyone needs more money right?

I create a law that says you must pay your employees 200.00 an hour - BAM! problem solved!

Originally posted by Julie Washington
The real problem:

We have too many laws.

LOL

You can't have too many laws!

Laws are what fix problems!

Imagine if there were no laws, none of our problems would ever be fixed!

reply to post by mnemeth1


This is a wonderful piece of sarcasm, but you better be careful. If the Obama admin get wind of this they may just hire you to be an advisor. They might make you King Liberal.

Originally posted by Feeling Frisky
reply to post by mnemeth1

 

This is a wonderful piece of sarcasm, but you better be careful. If the Obama admin get wind of this they may just hire you to be an advisor.

They might make you King Liberal.

Sir, please.

Obama can't hold a candle to my awesomeness.

I can out law him (get it, out law hahhhaha) any day of the week and twice on Sunday.

I am feeling lucky and frisky.

What about government officials, as a group, that are corrupt.

How can you outlaw that!

Originally posted by endisnighe
I am feeling lucky and frisky.

What about government officials, as a group, that are corrupt.

How can you outlaw that!

Amazingly, you don't need a law for that, we already have it!

But if you insist!

I'll create a law that says any politician that says laws are bad will be thrown in prison for LIFE!

People

Panty bombers got you down? LOL NO PROBLEM! I'll simply create a law that federalizes airport security and make panty bombs a criminal offense!

YOU WILL NEVER HAVE A PROBLEM WITH PANTY BOMBS AGAIN!

These politicians are so f'n dumb these days.

It takes people like myself to craft real legislation that will get the job done.

You can't trust these fly-by-night politicians that only craft laws favoring their corporate sponsors! I favor no one!

reply to post by mnemeth1


I agree that you are way awesomer than Obama could ever dream. For one, you aren't afraid to share your birth name with the public.

Originally posted by Feeling Frisky
reply to post by mnemeth1

 

I agree that you are way awesomer than Obama could ever dream. For one, you aren't afraid to share your birth name with the public.

Sir, do you think I'm so dumb as to share my birthname?

Come on, do I look like a politician?

I"M A PROBLEM SOLVER!

Take people stealing your identity online.

I got a solution.

I ban online transactions! BOOOOOOMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!! no more identity theft.

I'm kind of torn between that and a total take over of the web by government though. We all know government can protect our identity better than ourselves.




[edit on 14-1-2010 by mnemeth1]

reply to post by mnemeth1


I think you should have the government take over the web. As we all know, when the government takes anything over it becomes free. I am still waiting for my free healthcare. Plus, since they took over GM and Chrysler we will all be getting free cars before you know it.

I'm going to turn off the sarcasm here for a minute.

The purpose of this post is to highlight the fact that laws solve NO problems.

Laws are what politicians do when a real solution to a problem is not readily apparent.

Only laws that protect our civil and property rights have real purpose. That is to say laws that punish people who infringe on our rights or property. Everything else is a junk solution to a problem government can't fix.

There must be a victim for punishment to take place. Laws punish wrong doers, they don't solve problems.

Originally posted by Feeling Frisky
reply to post by mnemeth1

 

I think you should have the government take over the web. As we all know, when the government takes anything over it becomes free. I am still waiting for my free healthcare. Plus, since they took over GM and Chrysler we will all be getting free cars before you know it.

After a careful review of your comment, I have decided to agree with you.

Only when government controls everything will we truly be free. I personally think government should take over cable tv, because I need free skinamax.

Laws, the good people don't need them, and the bad people don't follow them.

Some quote I heard. Think about that!

Mnemeth would kindly come to Canada and solve our problems too? Our government is on vacation because of the olympics coming up and wont be back until march or something.

You could do a lot with your lawesome skills

Cheers

reply to post by mnemeth1


Welll if you get free skinamax then you are going to need free lotion, so you better take over Jergen's.

Originally posted by Feeling Frisky
reply to post by mnemeth1

 

Welll if you get free skinamax then you are going to need free lotion, so you better take over Jergen's.

Dude, you + me = utopia.

Come and be my VP.

I need problem solvers like yourself to work for my administration.



[edit on 14-1-2010 by mnemeth1]