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Secret Plot to get into RATS

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posted on May, 14 2004 @ 02:15 AM
I will admit it.

Besides tourette's, I also suffer from monomania.

I want to get into the "Really" above top secret website. I NEED to know what's in there. And yet I cannot. My mind creates scenarios. I imagine it contains the 'secret briefing' that each new president receives after being sworn in, when he finds out who the flock is really running the world. I imagine it details the killers of Kennedy, Lincoln, King. I imagine it hold the blueprints of the 200 mph carbeurator, the cold fusion, the philosopher's stone.

I imagine a lounge atmosphere, deep and subterranean. Moody jazz and the quiet clink of beer bottles, the acrid scent of cigarettes blending with hashish as the crowd talks quietly around tables where rich dark espresso is served. To those who have enough points.

that's where I'm supposed to be. In there. In the Really Above Top Secret site. They are my people. Among my own kind, I would be respected and admired. But for now, I live as an exile in the frozen wastes, out here with the suspicous proletariat. Those without enough precious points. The madding crowd passes by uncaring; while I, I dream of that mystic 33rd degree, called "Really Above Top Secret."

To lounge on soft pillows in that enclave, as we discuss the truths that are so obvious, once you know.

And so now, in the part of the rant no one else is reading I will confess it: I have sinned. I created the stewpidest question thread I could think of. On purpose. And it is drawing the masses like flies to shoot. I am getting more points from that stupid thread than from some of the others, which have been brilliant, by the way.

It isn't fair. It's immoral. But I mus have MY POINTS!

I've written about genetically engineered wheat. No response. I've actually researched the companies that contracted out the tortures at Abu Ghraib. 1 response. I've speculated about withdrawal from Iraq. I've offered praise and condolences. But what brings in the points? Acting like a total dishpit.

But I must have the points. Must have them. For my precious. Precious. we must have it. Precious is our entry into the Rats. Yesss. Yessss. Anything for you, precioussss. My life for YOU!

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 05:10 AM
i wouldnt worry about it. five minutes after you gain access you'll be crying for a refund... didnt hear that from me!

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 05:59 AM
RATs is just an area which is safe from search engines. It always members to discuss sensetive information without the worry of any lurkers reading it.

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 09:38 AM
hehe, if you're expecting that, you'll really be disappointed.
There are some interesting topics, but it's nothing really special.

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 10:04 AM
I agree with parrhesia. Some interesting stuff from time to time but really nothing special. The way I look at it what would I use those points for anyway?

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 03:34 PM
I have just received an email from someone exalted. (ssshhh). I don't know if it is permitted to mention. But I was awarded extra points for the quality of one of my threads.

SO, there is hope. The path to RATS need not be paved with crappy, self-serving threads after all. THEY reward quality when they see it. Regardless of the fact that YEW PEEPLE frequently fail to appreciate the airtight/bulletproof quality of my arguments, and the penetrating DEPTH of my questions. THEY do exist, and sometimes reward sincere seekers for their toil.

So now I'm off to the library, to compile possible conspiracy threads worthy of true merit. But before I go, I must address the deliverer(s) of points:

O, most dread and munificent sovreign(s), may you live forever! I give thanks that upon this day, thou didst deign to glance through the clouds beneath your celestial feet, and perceive in your mercy that I come, seeking only wisdom, only light.

Thanks. And please know, that the slightest whim of your passing fancy is the supreme goal of my entire bloodline, noble sir(s) and/or madame(s). May you wax ever more profound.

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 04:49 PM
I would have given you applause for this thread if I were a mod. But really, there's nothing in there but deviant homo cyber sex, illicit drug web-cam use, copyright infringement, plots on world leaders lives. Nothing really big. I hardly go there unless I want to talk trash about my boss.

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 06:07 PM
DC, you forgot the devient sexual behavior of the Sesame Street muppets that is constantly discussed.

posted on May, 14 2004 @ 11:05 PM
Intreped - I must insist that Simon bans you forthwith. You know that we have been warned constantly never to discuss the muppets on pain of death.

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