I'm sorry, it seems I cry far too often these days.
It's perfecty normal Miss Terry, this is what we are here for. Here, take a tissue.
It's just that I am telling you things that I have never even spoke of, things I have pushed far into the back of my mind, they are too painful to
remember, but lately they are all I can think of, dream of, I feel that I have become obsessed with getting over it all now.
Alright, tell me, begin where you feel you need to, but don't leave out details, or your feeling. No one is going to hurt you here, you can trust
Oh, where to start...well, when I met him he seemed like a great guy, he worked with a well known company, and had moved his elderly mother into his
home to take care of her. He dressed nice, smelled good, he was kind, gentle and said all the right things to draw me in. Oh God if I had only been
Miss Terry, you just described to me someone that any of us could accept into our lives, you cannot, please you will learn not to, blame yourself.
Well it didn't take long after I moved in with them for their true colors to start showing. Thinking back, I started having stomach trouble right
after I moved in, nothing serious, just a lot of diarehea and general upset stomach, but I bet even then she was poisoning me. She acted though, to my
face, as though I were the daughter she never had. I loved her. I even fought him over his treatment of her!
You weren't blind, you were decieved. There is a big difference. You didn't have any way of knowing what you had gotten in to yet.
I feel like they were professionals, like they did this all the time! He would argue with her, I sided with his mother, then he would turn around and
tell me how she coudn't stand me, called me a bi*ch when she talked to him about me. I thought she maybe was senile or mentally ill then. But the
night he lost it the first time, I knew it was both of them. I was caught in some sick game they were playing. The first time he went off the deep end
was during sex. He started biting me, lightly, on the shoulder, then he bit down really hard! I automatically jerked away and slapped at him, and he
grabbed me, and he had a razor knife in his hand! I don't even know where it came from, but he cut me on the neck, I screamed and was trying to get
away from him, but he is very strong and held me in the room, he started sucking the blood from the cut, and then dropped to the floor, passed out
cold! He passed out in pure ectasy of what he was doing! I felt like a total fool, I walked out of the room crying and his mother met me in the hall,
she was telling me to take my clothes and go, before he comes to. I thought she was being genuine. But I gathered a few things and was about to go out
the door, and she started yelling to him to get up, that I was leaving and he would go to jail! He jumped up and was pulling me back, he put his hand
over my mouth and brought me back to the couch, holding tight so I could not get away. His mother brought a roll of duct tape in the room, as though
it were something she does all the time, she knew what to do. He duct taped my mouth, my legs and feet together, my hands. I was taped to the couch
too. I couldn't move. My mother came by the next morning, we were supposed to have lunch, but he went outside when she pulled up. I found out much
later that he had told her that I had a really bad headache and had taken something that knocked me out.
Miss Terry, do you feel that you did anything to bring any of this on?
I did, for a while, but I know I was a victim now. I knew I was that day he cut me the first time. But he had my head messed up for months. He kept me
tied up. He got tired of my family hounding him for my whereabouts, so one day he packed everything, and I was the last thing to go. He literally
packed me into a box. He put me in it and took me to a truck, went to the 'new house' and unloaded me. I didn't know where I was. Even then he
wouldn't give me clothes to wear, because he knew I would run. He would undo my mouth to let me eat, then shove food into my mouth, screaming how
ungrateful I am to get to eat, if I couldn't eat it like that he would stop shoveling it in and start slapping me. I started losing weight, and he
would say what a shame it was that I was such a pig that someone had to take control of me to get me to loose weight. All the while him and his mother
would drink and fight, many times she came up to me and would slap me, or hit me in the head and tell me what a slut she thinks I am, tell me how I
will never take her son away from her, that I wasn't good enough for him. He caught her slapping me one day and beat the living daylights out of her.
She was 66 years old, but I hated her so much that I felt good about it! Is that sick or what? Oh God!
They weren't well, not at all. Somehow they slipped through the hands of those who could have identified their issues, maybe even could have saved
you from going through all of what you have gone through. You didn't deserve this Miss Terry, you didn't do anything to make this happen. Remember
that. I want you to bring me up to that final day, the day you escaped, we can always go back over the details, but we need to get to that point
OK, um, that morning he didn't give me food, he got up and went straight for the liquor. 100 proof whiskey. By around 9 in the morning he was ready
to fight somebody. He started with me. He walked around me in circles, he had put me in a kitchen chair and pulled out his newest toy. A gun. He stuck
it to my head and was saying 'make me believe you want to live'. I had tape on my mouth, and all I could do was try to beg for my life by mumbing
through it. He would say that I wasn't speaking clearly, and if I didn't speak clearly, he might take it that I want to die today! His drunk mother
came into the kitchen and wasn't startled at all by the scene. She walked right past us and got her a coke out of the fridge, and right back out of
the room. He put the gun down long enough to go to the bathroom. When he did, she came back into the kitchen and set the gun in my lap. My hands were
tied behind the chair. I moved and the gun fell into the floor and she starts screamng for him to come here. She told him I had the gun and that she
knocked it out of my hands. Even though he knew this was impossible, it gave him a reason to hit me. He busted my mouth wide open with his fist. And
my eyes. He undid one hand, and broke all my fingers. Then walked out of the house. I didn't see him again for hours. His mother came into the
kitchen with a wet washcloth and was cleaning me up, she was singing to me and telling me what a 'good girl' I was, and how she would help me get
away. She fixed some canned soup and put a straw in it so I could sip at it. We heard him coming and she ran out of the room, with the soup telling me
not to tell him she fed me. So he comes back in and with that razor knife he cut free all the tape. He looked at me so sincerly, and began to cry, he
held me and said his mother had messed him up, and that was why he does the things he does. To make her happy. He said it was time to end this, and
that he didn't care if I turned him in, that he should go to jail. He told me to go. It only took me a second, I was only covered in a sheet but I
ran out that door and ran so fast, for so long it seemed, then cramps set in. I doubled over and fell to the ground they hurt so bad. I couldnt
uncurl, I was in such pain. I heard a car coming and rolled over into the taller grass, I was afraid it was him, but it wasn't. I missed that chance
of getting help. But later, maybe about an hour or so, another car came and I managed to stand and get their attention. At the hospital, they told me
I had ingested some kind of enzymes, like what people put in their septic tanks. She fed it to me, and almost killed me, well you already know that
doctor, but when I saw them bring his mother's body in, I couldn't stop shaking, screaming inside, I was happy, elated and terrfied at the same
time! She was dead! I saw her! Her head was practically cut off, and she had been shot!
Do you still feel glad that he murdered his mother?
No, I am glad she was punished, but I hate that he killed her. I know it is fuel for his fury now. Doc, how long will I have to stay here? I feel like
I am in jail, and I was a victim in all this.
You are here for your own protection Miss Terry. He has left a trail of bodies now. And the only one he wants is you. Until he is caught, or finds
you, he will not stop. I know this is unfair to you, you deserve your life to start again, but we cannot risk him getting to you.
I am safe here, I have to keep telling myself this. Doc I am ready for lunch, how bout you, do you want to have your lunch on the lawn with us
Oh I would love to, but the institution has hired a new maintenance man, he needs to do some work apparently in my office area so I will be taking off
after our session for the rest of the day.
See doc, I still relate everything to him You said maintenance man, and my first thought was that is what he did for years. He worked for a couple of
the best paying companies and blew it every time.
Well do your best to put him out of your mind today. I will be back on Monday and we will talk again. Good Day Miss Terry.
[edit on 29-6-2009 by space cadet]