Things people never say.

I'm so happy they deleted the thread with the lively discussion on it.

Nothing's as fun as the viruses and spam.

i love it when the internet connection decides not to work and has me resorting to bashing the monitor in frustration

I REALY like beets.

i really really really love watching teletubbies everyday, all day

my little bro says that!

The government rules

George bush has a mind of his own

I need to

I think I should stop after the 50th big mac

Mcdonalds doesn't make you fat

"That movie on the SciFi channel was very quite moving..."

Where did i put my spare veloceraptor?

Look i'm not saying it's small, it's just not that big.

Damn i wish they would make 19 films of Legally Blonde.

Listen Angelina Joley, Jennifer Garner and Keira Knightley, i'm just not interested in a foursome.

Yeah i would sleep with George Bush instead of Johnny Depp.

Yeah the kids are over at Jacksons. (Was that one in bad taste?)

I am telling you, i can climb Everest naked using only dental floss as rope.

[edit on 4-6-2006 by ImaginaryReality1984]

"id love to have that new Ferrari Enzo as a gift, but i must refuse as i am concerned about the damaging effect its fuel consupmtion and emmissions will have on the enviroment"

"I wish Ben Affleck would star in more movies, he's underused"

"When I win the lottery, I'm giving all my winnings to that nice Mr. Grififn from the BNP"

"Wanted: Three Legged Albino Hermaphrodite for Poetry reading, dinner parties and games of twister"

"Who invented Oranges?"

"Let's invite Charles Manson round, I hear he's an amazing dancer"

"I used to love Jimi Hendrix and The Beatles, but then I found out they used drugs, so now I listen to Bob Marley and The Rolling Stones instead"

"I'm not Gay! I just married these 4 guys because nobody wanted to watch football with me!"

"I love when my internet runs slow. I love spending my time on the internet waiting."

"That Chihuahua is the biggest dog I've ever seen."

"What? You wanna give me $1 million? No I don't think I want it."

You have a tremendous willy, may I touch it?
Peace in the Middle East!
Radiohead are crap. Durh
You are as beautful as a rock in a policeman's face.
You are sick and twisted like a sunday massacre.
Touch me, I'm sick!
Don't be a tosser.
Wear a sports bra to hold up your man boobs.
Understand your man!
Fight for what you believe in, just don't get me involved.
England for rent.
Making fun of disabled people is rewarding.
Being a Catholic must be great. Sex is always dirty.
Oh if I was with Prince William, we'd giggle and write poems for each other.
Rob Schnieder is the most talented actor that has ever lived, in the world...ever.
Vote Tory, so we can finish what Thatcher started!

To heck with my superbowl tickets Honey, lets spend the weekend with your mom and dad.

"i like larry flint"

"these lofers look good on me"

and an american..."thank you"

I've drunk ten cups of coffee this morning and didn't have to go to the bathroom all day.

The pilot has just turned on the Fasten Seatbelt sign, so we can do a Cobra in this 757.

(at the public tv auction) All the phones are ringing off the hook for the tickets to the bagpipe rap group!

Remember, kids, to leave the ice chest out in the open for the bears.

The NSA is no longer monitoring any phone calls.

(in the hotel room) That's alright, dear, spend as much time in the bathroom as you want. The kids and I can wait.

The car's on empty. Here's $20. Now go fill it up.

No waiting. Please go right in. The doctor's waiting for you.

My, that Steve Irwin is a sophisticated individual.

[edit on 6-6-2006 by Beelzebubba]

Originally posted by Godzilla1985
"That movie on the SciFi channel was very quite moving..."

Really???? I thought it was boring and over done.

Honey, in all our 50 years of marriage, my best moment was catching that perch.

Hey, I just got an invitation to an open house at Area 51.

I could watch Conan the Barbarian all day.

Here, stranger, please take this winning megamega jackpot ticket.

What!? The Pope's not Catholic?

Hurry! Gulp down that poi.

My computer is a technical work of perfection, and there's nothing I ever need to do to it.

What about all the good things Hitler did?

"Martha Stewart is so hot"

"please send my computer a virus"

"shoot me!!!!!!"(hmm, actually, people seem to say that often.)

(Americans)"lets fly to Russia and tell them that Rambo 4 is coming out!"

"Hey Russian! Yes you! Lets fight!"

"No, I do not want to climb the tree, even though that lion is chasing me. I'm gonna face him like a man"

" Sure honey! I'd love to do chores and wash dishes instead of kicking it with my friends"