How do I make them "go away"?

It started about three weeks ago. Now, every Saturday morning I get a couple of folks from Jehovahs' Witnesses coming to my door. They seem nice enough. And I certainly must say that I can respect them for their personal committment to their beliefs but..... the belief's that they hold simply do not jive with my own.

Of course, I should just tell them to "shooo", "scat", "scram"! But, perhaps the type of person that I am, I just can't help but debate Bible and Religion with these guys. At times, it's just maddening.

For example, did you know the archangel, Micheal, IS Jesus Christ? I just can't find this in MY Bible. Yet, they insist that this is true.

This and other things that they tell me, as Gospel (pun intended) drives me crazy. Is there any way to argue with these guys? Is there anything that will just "shut down" a Jehovah's Witness?

If you want them to go away quit discussing the Bible with them, don't even talk about the weather.

Don't answer the door. Or behead them with their own sword.

The first choice requires less preparation, I suggest that one.

There is a third alternative--next Saturday, decorate the door they come calling at with something decidedly sinister in attitude and symbology, perhaps something bloody.


naah, maybe not.

I made this mistake a few years ago. At first it was mildly interesting to hear the JW take on things, but when my interest waned theirs didn't. I decided to take matters into my own hands. I hit on one of the females in the group and was rebuffed. I thought that would be the end of it but they came around again, so I hit on the male of the duo. That ended it quick smart.

I always thank them for their concern and tell them that I am happy with my faith. They always leave afterward.

benevolent tyrant, a couple years ago they started to come to my door. The first time it was a couple of older ladies and we chatted at the door about how crappy the times were.
After that they kept coming back. I didn't want to talk to them anymore. They were coming at awkward times and really I'm not interested in talking to them about their interpretation of the bible.
So what I did is I stopped answering the door. I'd rather do that than tell them to get lost or what ever. So they stopped coming while I was home and came while my wife was home alone. At that time she stayed at home with the kids and she was feeling like she wasn't getting much 'out side' contact. She invited them in to chat. She had major problems with the religion she was raised in. She really liked some of the things the JW had to say. She almost became one of them. I thought it was getting out of hand and I presented to her the things that they were not telling her and she severed her contact with them. I really don't know what she said to them. Now, every so often I find large envelopes in my mail box stuffed with Watch Tower magazines and requests for my wife to call them.

benevolent tyrant, if you want them to go away there are a few different things you can do.

1. Tell them in a flat and honest way you don't want them to come you your house anymore. They will make not and never return.

2. Never answer the door for them anymore. Make it known you are at home while you do this. They should get the hint.

3.

Is there any way to argue with these guys?

Sure, Ask them these questions.

How to make them go away?

I know a simple way.

Tell them you are a Mormon. (no kidding!)

I don't know why, but JWs think Mormons are absolutely horrible people, and I know some of my Mormon friends who have told JW missionaries they were Mormons, and the JWs leave as soon as you tell them. I have no idea why. I'm a Mormon;,I've never tried this myself, though. I've only had JWs show up once to my house, and I didn't tell them what religion I was, and they never came back, so I didn't worry about it.

Beelzebubba sort of uses my method. I invite them in and show them around the place and linger in the bedroom. They seem quite uncomfortable there with all the mirrors and whips and restraints. I don't quite understand it, but to each his own I guess.

Not really!! I just tell them thanks, but no thanks as I pull back the hammer.

Point to multple items in your house
Ask, how much do you think I paid for that? or that?
Then
Whip out the AMWAY catalog.

coming to the door in tighty whities always works for me, either that or invite them to come in and urinate in front of them in a cup...

I dont have a problem with thems since i know they use thier own mangled translation of the bible. And can out bible-thump them at the door, it gets to the point they run away while throwing copies of the watch tower at me.

The most serious consequence of the Jehovah's Witnesses' use of reason as the standard for doctrine is their denial of the Trinity. They believe there is only one divine person, who should be called Jehovah. Christ can be called Son of God, but he is only a "god" not true God. Before he came into the world he was the archangel Michael. He is not equal to the Father. The "holy spirit" is only the power of God.

Since Jehovah's Witnesses do not believe Jesus is the divine Savior from sin, their doctrine of salvation is a system of work righteousness. All that Christ won for us is a chance for us to win life for ourselves.

Other errors of Jehovah's Witnesses are millennialism and rejection of the continued existence of the soul between death and the resurrection. During the millennium people will have another chance to win salvation.

A practice which has often gotten Jehovah's Witnesses into difficulties with governments is their refusal to salute the flag or to participate in the affairs of secular government. Jehovah's Witnesses have sometime been taken into court because their beliefs led them to refuse blood transfusions for their children.

The errors of Jehovah's Witnesses are so serious that they cannot be regarded as a Christian church, but an unchristian cult. They, however, regard themselves as the true religion.

You need to know that they "earn points" when talking to you at your doorstep, and when they are invited into your home. So the best is to say "I don't belvie in your religious cult, and instead belive in salvation by faith through Jesus Christ the son of God"

Memorise this:

John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

Just tell them your a pagan. Worked wonders for my mum. She just said, and I quote,
"I'm Pagan, and my husband's Jewish" and something about the children, and the lady at the door took her daughter and ran down the walkway.

I'm not kidding.

--Kit.

when they say God Bless you, ask which one. If this or one of the other suggestions doesnt work.

loudly inform them that they are trespassing and if they are still in sight in 60
seconds you will have them arrested and carted off.

Throw a stick out into the street and command them to fetch. Immediately close the door.

[edit on 12-12-2005 by Thomas Crowne]

Originally posted by benevolent tyrant
Of course, I should just tell them to "shooo", "scat", "scram"! But, perhaps the type of person that I am, I just can't help but debate Bible and Religion with these guys. At times, it's just maddening.

They will keep coming as long as they think you're open to listening. Arguing scripture proves that you are open to hear what they have to say. Most of them are apologetic masters and can run circles around any objection you have. In the event you come up with an objection they don't know the answer to, that just guarantees a future visit.

You're going to have to confront them one way or another. Personally, I don't feel the least bit bad being rude to people who show up at my door unwanted and univited.

My friends family hasnt had a JW visit in 3 generations.. answer the door naked.. and preferibly armed, shotguns or bowie knives make the best impression