Panda huggers

Obviously you haven't seen Kung Foo Panda.

A panda saved my life once...

Don't know whether it was a fine, or cruel fate, that brought-about my encounter with Blink-Blink.

You see : it had been raining for days, as was evidenced by the apparent raging creeks and streams, we observed through the wonderful windows of the Bamboo-Express, as we slowly wound our way off over the plains, up through and over the steppes, and were creeping towards the base of the mountain-climb.

The train came to a rather abrupt halt, as we looked-out into the now dark fields of the deep rural Bing-Bang-Badang region of the bamboo forests of China.

There was an announcement over the PA system of the train shortly, which my travelling companion translated to me as an explanation that the track was completely blocked by multiple landslides, and even a bridge dangerously close to being washed-out.

The train was to wind slowly back to the last station, only about 8 km away.
The ride was slow, and almost hypnotically rhythmic, as we wondered what our options were.

It wasn't 5 minutes that some fellow came-in to our wagon, and seemed to make some sort of announcement.
He didn't look like a conductor.

My travel companion told me that there may be a quick opportunity, for an alternative way into the Bamboo-Forest-Reserve-Area, but there was only one place left, and the price was steep.

There we were, an unlikely crew consisting of moi, China's most sultry movie-star : Boink-Boink, who was heading into the Bamboo-Forest to visit her dear ailing grandmother, two veterinarians with the Ministry of Pandas, and Blink-Blink.

We sat in the cramped back of an odd twin-prop, on side benches with no seatbelts.
The swirling winds brought our first take-off attempt to a jerky halt.

Boink-Boink had started a rather low, but definitely audible whimpering.
As the pilot brought the plane back along the runway, there was a very long pause at the wind-flag.
It was quite obvious that he was a seasoned bush-pilot, but was now appearing to not be sure about which direction would be best for the next takeoff attempt.

It seemed as if the more, and longer that the pilot stared at the rapidly whipping-around wind-flag, searching for some sort of pattern, like a gambler ready to make a large desperate bet : the louder became the whimpering of Blink-Blink.

As the plane was now at a total standstill, as the pilot gazed at the wind-flag, as the whimpering increased : my focus was becoming rather intense on this vibe of impending danger.

With the beginning tinges of panic, my eyes raised, and somehow unexplainably synchronistically slid-up sideways to meet the eyes of Boink-Boink.

Our souls locked in that instant, with multiple levels of deep connection.

We hadn't noticed that the pilot had bought the plane back to the same starting side of the runway, as was now in position for another attempt at takeoff.

Our swelling emotions told us both that it was all wrong, and we should not go-up into the turbulent weather at-all, at-all.
Even any kind of bumps would have us bouncing around like pinballs.
The pilot was obviously intent on earning his biggest payday of the year, and seemed resolute to head into the heavy weather, and cloud-cover that was below the mountain-tops.

As the connection with Boink-Boink was resonating, as the whimpering of Blink-Blink turned to a howl, as the vets tried to sooth her, we attempted simultaneously to alert the pilot that we wanted out, and did not want to attempt this flight.

But our voices were now drowned-out, as the pilot had decided the best approach was to totally gun the engines to maximum power, and to attempt an all-out, all-or-nothing takeoff attempt.

He couldn't hear us as we cried louder to stop, the engines screamed as the pilot stared at the wind-flag, looking for some sort of pattern worth gambling on.

Even as we stood still, the swirling gusts of wind shook the plane uncomfortably.

The plane jerked forward at an extreme force to the body, and

Aww it's a long story.
Forget it.

a reply to: Nothin

A panda is picked up by a call girl, the panda asks for some bamboo food to eat before he gets to work, after a good 90 minutes of hardcore panda action he leaves his mark and goes to exit the sleazy bedsit, the call girl says hey where you going you have to pay, the panda looks confused, so she gets the dictionary out and says look under prostitute, has sex for money

The panda flings it back opened at panda, and says look what it says about me

Eats Bamboo shoots and leaves



Haha

a reply to: robsmith

What is best in life?

To crush the Pandas, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their females...

a reply to: DAVG1980

Har-de-har-har !!

a reply to: robsmith
From an evolutionary viewpoint, the Pandas continued existence is a possible roadblock to progress.

If we were to assume that things evolve on a one out - one in basis, who's to say that we aren't missing out on a better animal which is yet to appear?

Maybe, when Pandas finally go extinct, we'll get those laser sharks we're all hoping for.

originally posted by: gortex
a reply to: robsmith

The Panda has spent 11.6 million years sitting , chewing and scratching its nuts , an achievement any red blooded male should be jealous of.

I'll leave this here...