Cruelty Inc.

Cruelty Inc. is a name I have given to certain people. You know....you are going through a difficult time and instead of giving real help...they put you down and attack your self-worth your good qualities....emotionally and mentally they try and tear you apart.

I once handed out free clothes to people who needed them and got beat up for it. That was so difficult. I like to help people when I can...a five dollar bill, encouragement,' a listening ear a shoulder to cry on.

There are so many people that are so rude and critical in a cruel way...and they are cruel on purpose and enjoy hurting people.

The tenderness of kindness, showing respect to people giving them dignity. The verbal attack by someone you don't even know and have done nothing to.

They say help those that want to be helped; those that don't walk away from.

a reply to: alexandrae

Don’t be discouraged by them; keep helping people out. It is good and very needed in this world. Don’t pay attention to the jerks that say negative things to you because it says more about them and who they are which is good to know.

it depends are you doing it to help people?
or are you doing it to get approval and accolades?

if you are doing it to help, develop a thicker skin and keep doing what needs doing.
if you are doing it for approval, develop a thicker skin because there are always going to be critics.

originally posted by: alexandrae

There are so many people that are so rude and critical in a cruel way...and they are cruel on purpose and enjoy hurting people.

For most people, I don't think they actually enjoy being that way. It's just who they are. It comes naturally for them.

originally posted by: alexandrae
Cruelty Inc. is a name I have given to certain people. You know....you are going through a difficult time and instead of giving real help...they put you down and attack your self-worth your good qualities....emotionally and mentally they try and tear you apart.

I once handed out free clothes to people who needed them and got beat up for it. That was so difficult. I like to help people when I can...a five dollar bill, encouragement,' a listening ear a shoulder to cry on.

There are so many people that are so rude and critical in a cruel way...and they are cruel on purpose and enjoy hurting people.

The tenderness of kindness, showing respect to people giving them dignity. The verbal attack by someone you don't even know and have done nothing to.

They say help those that want to be helped; those that don't walk away from.

A fellow human being human. I appreciate you and your actions, providing, as mentioned, that you are doing it for kindness and not for accolade or approval. I cant stand the tiktok turds that are like "look at me I'm helping! See my video!" And such. But I have a feeling you're genuine and we need more of you. If people are giving you a hard time about it then laugh at them. To thier face.

a reply to: AgeisContemplation

I am being helpful...I don't care if people notice or not; ever since I was a child I would give away my toys and stuff; it's just what I do.

a reply to: Onlyyouknow

Thank you for your encouragement...I am 72 now and because of all the gun violence in Seattle...well I don't want to get shot. We have a free table in the lobby of the apartment building I live in...so for now I put stuff there.

a reply to: alexandrae

That's nice of you. I wouldn't blame anyone for being very hesitant to help out in high crime areas.

a reply to: alexandrae

A man was collecting "will work for food."

Handed him a burger, fries, drink n desert from fast food across the street.

He looked at it and said " What Am I supposed to do with THIS?"
(Because it wasn't CASH).

Kind of crushes the spirit of giving. And, I always give....

a reply to: mysterioustranger

Wow! That's what I mean....attitude ... some people just cannot be grateful.

a reply to: alexandrae

Wow you're such a good person! You give out clothes, money, and listen to people. And you have to tell everybody about it too.

Lol.

That's what this post felt like a little, looking for a little pat on the back. But it's ok.

I do understand what it's like to do something nice for somebody and they don't appreciate it- but I've learned from it, too. Like how sometimes when you're doing something nice for somebody, you are deciding what is good and what is bad for them, without consulting them about it. It's very pushy. Almost rapey in fact. Even if it's clearly a good thing, or you meant well... sometimes it's not received that way because they didn't ask for it or want it.

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

Love that expression. To me it's about how people tend to want to force their good intentions on others- assert control. For example, person A with good intentions is deciding how person B should live their life (without person B's consent). And I'm not about that at all... not at all.

I say consult with them first. Ask for consent. That's the quickest way for you to figure out if they want to be helped or not, lol.

a reply to: geezlouise

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

I usually interpret that saying more like someone who means to do the right thing, but they didn't expect this bad consequence would result from it.

So that good thing was actually a bad thing, they just didn't know it was gonna turn out the way it did.

I just don't see it as being the same thing. What you're saying is that someone did a good thing, but the other person just didn't want it, but it didn't result in any negative consequences. It was merely a refusal.

a reply to: geezlouise

A kind gesture should never be discouraged. There is a saying: don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

a reply to: BrokenCircles

Somebody who forces their personal standard of living on others (with good intentions) will produce bad consequences. That's exactly what I'm talking about. It will have a reverse effect than what they intended.

We're not in a disagreement.

a reply to: Onlyyouknow

Being kind would be asking for consent and there's many ways to do this. But with empathy is the kindest route imho. Empathy is key.

a reply to: Onlyyouknow

And also, asking specifically how you can be of help, that is kindness too. Because then you're not only asking for consent, you're also giving them the choice/freedom/autonomy on specifically how you can help- they get to decide what kind of help they need, etc.

a reply to: geezlouise

I just see it differently I suppose. If someone gives you a gift; you accept it in the spirit it was given. If you don’t need or want it then pass it on to someone who does. I don’t think it is wise to discourage anyone from helping someone.

a reply to: Onlyyouknow

I'm not discouraging anybody from being less helpful, in fact what I'm doing here is encouraging people to be more helpful.

By challenging others to think more deeply about it.

I'm only being empathetic to those who might feel offended by a supposed "gift."

For one, I have given "gifts" with good intentions prior and it had negative consequences, and I was able to contemplate it and understand it and deduce that maybe it was kind of pompous of me, wasn't it, to decide that this other person needed this specific "gift" and surprise them with it. Even if my heart was pure.

Some people just don't like to be surprised and it would be a kindness to be empathetic of that.

And also I just empathize what it feels like to sense that this other person giving this "gift" is really looking down on others and feeling superior, and there's not all that much empathy, and there's no connection.

There's so many variables and layers to it, you know?

originally posted by: geezlouise
a reply to: Onlyyouknow

I'm not discouraging anybody from being less helpful, in fact what I'm doing here is encouraging people to be more helpful.

By challenging others to think more deeply about it.

I'm only being empathetic to those who might feel offended by a supposed "gift."

For one, I have given "gifts" with good intentions prior and it had negative consequences, and I was able to contemplate it and understand it and deduce that maybe it was kind of pompous of me, wasn't it, to decide that this other person needed this specific "gift" and surprise them with it. Even if my heart was pure.

Some people just don't like to be surprised and it would be a kindness to be empathetic of that.

And also I just empathize what it feels like to sense that this other person giving this "gift" is really looking down on others and feeling superior, and there's not all that much empathy, and there's no connection.
There's so many variables and layers to it, you know?

But there is the rub; That sense or feeling comes from within you. A gift is a gift.
Good banter Geezlouise; I do understand what you are saying.

a reply to: alexandrae

Just keep going. Those truly in need appreciate it, those who don't and are abusive, well I wouldn't say they aren't worth the time but just don't waste yours worrying about them.

I was homeless once, travelling through Toronto, and saw a very old lady also homeless and sat near her to feel safe as I was really young. It was a warm, summer evening and in time we got speaking. At one point she looked at the only food I had, an apple and orange, and said she probably needed some vitamins. I offered her both but she smiled a huge toothless grin and said It was just too hard without teeth. I offered to ask around and see if anyone had a knife. She said it still wouldn't work, then asked if I could chew a bit first and give it to her! It was hilarious, sitting there pre-chewing fruit but we both enjoyed the company and to this day I treasure that moment of connection, stepping out of my comfort zone and giving life sustaining help albeit weird.

People's negativity is about them, your emotional reaction to them is about you and will guide you. It isn't easy but that discomfort is what you want to rise above. It might never go away but it can get easier and applies to everything.