Greedy Relatives Didn't Get This

You guys know exactly what I'm talking about.

The kind of relatives that are nowhere to be seen when the elderly relatives need help. When the elderly relatives call them there is never an answer. The second the elderly relative dies those people are like BLOOD hounds scouring the house for any crumbs! All of a sudden they have all the time in the world... so sickening!

Yes this is a true story. My MIL passed away, the first on the scene were my greedy relatives. I found it funny because they previously were always were too busy to help with anything despite living ten minutes away. They were there were scouring the house, and in just a few short hours my SIL was emailing everyone asking about account #'s. Did I mention they were estranged from my inlaws for over 16 years! Yes my MIL body's was not even warm when my SIL was emailing about accounts. Big time family drama occured and eventually the dust settled. Keep in mind my MIL & FIL were not people of a lot of means, so we're not talking dynasty💍💰💵 here.

Lemme back up a bit a few years. One week after my FIL passed I had the most vivid dream I ever had in my life. He told me clear as day to tell my husband to check under the file. I was so bothered by the dream I even talked to my MIL (still alive at that point) about it. She had no clue what it mean but told us, she too heard his voice often. I never heard or dreamt of him again.

So the greedy relatives ransacked the house getting what they deemed of value. Guess where they didn't look...
This file folder!! Knowing my FIL he would be cracking up about it! For those that don't know what they are looking at, it's 25 pages of silver!


Here's what I have learned from both sides of my family. It isn't the money that elderly people leave that is the treasure.
It is them. They are the treasure. Hearing the stories from my mom and dad & MIL & FIL, in their last months was worth more than any money on earth.
People miss out on it big time because they are keeping family grudges. They miss out on it because their time is too precious.
They are truly missing out, and trying to scrounge for crumbs after someone dies will never fulfill that missing hole. My husband and I did get
a chuckle out of the coins and will have a story to tell our grandchildren about it someday.

a reply to: JAGStorm
I wonder how many can say they relate to this? I certainly do, the vultures were already circling before a loved one had even passed. Vultures that wouldn’t have given this love one the time of day before being on the deathbed. It’s really sickening. I refuse to have anything to do with these vultures! all it ever is with them is drama drama drama.

a reply to: JAGStorm

My FIL is now living with us. We moved him from Illinois to Oregon.

My wife’s family are the same. Once my wife got Guardianship of my FIL and I stated that we have done a video inventory of all his possessions we had someone, my wife’s aunt actually storm out of the house.

We’ve taken a financial hit, incurred more costs and all the vultures care about are what they can take!

a reply to: DBCowboy

Life is too short to have these kind of people in my life. Like I said it’s never anything but drama drama drama! If there is no drama they make drama because they don’t know how to live without it. It makes me sick!

a reply to: PiratesCut

the vultures were already circling

They were there within the hour, they were emailing about accounts less than 8 hours after that.
My MIL body had just been taken to the morgue. My husband was in shock and they didn't even give him time to cope.
It was sick. I saw the lowest form of human behavior when parents on both sides passed. Seriously people did things I didn't think they were remotely capable of.

a reply to: DBCowboy

As primary caregivers you're legally entitled to compensation from the estate, tell them to GFO.

a reply to: DBCowboy

We’ve taken a financial hit, incurred more costs and all the vultures care about are what they can take!

At my FIL funeral my SIL put up a picture board of him with her kids. Remember they had been estranged for so long the "kids" were now ADULTS!!! Nobody fell for it and it was downright awkward!

a reply to: JAGStorm

thankfully it was nothing like this on my wife’s side of the family when either of her parents passed. On my side however……..SICK!
At first I was very angry and now I’m just sad about it. To live ones entire life like this must really suck.
All set, see ya.
My wife and kids are doing just fine and while everyone struggles with the difficulties of life the drama is certainly gone and I don’t miss it!

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: DBCowboy

As primary caregivers you're legally entitled to compensation from the estate, tell them to GFO.

We know that but want to secure his finances in case the dementia gets so severe we can place him in a better facility .

a reply to: JAGStorm

is it weird that you were actually making my stomach hurt?
can you imagine being them rather than witnessing them?
hey, I am far from perfect that’s for sure but I just don’t get this kind of behavior!

a reply to: DBCowboy

Before my MIL passed this was the only thing my wife's family cared about, taking care of mom!
Five kids and not one cared anything about the money or what they could get when she was gone.
Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be! Come on people!
The old adage of you can’t choose family is certainly true!

I've seen people turn into vultures as you've described. I've seen it several times. People who are always too busy to visit, but suddenly have all the time in the world when there are material gains to be had.
A friend of mine had a niece who flat-out looted her grandmother's house while the grandmother was in hospice care. The niece insisted that "Grandma wanted me to have it". Jewelry, furniture, whatever.
"She wanted me to have it" became her mantra.
This same niece rarely visited her grandmother, even though she lived just a couple miles away.

My friend (along with some of his relatives) has totally written-off the niece. They won't have anything to do with her.

I knew a beautiful young lady that took care of her father during his last year when he was stricken with heart disease. After he passed away, she was at the funeral home taking care of arrangements then returned to his house to get some info that they needed. When she arrived, the house had people inside that she had never met before. It turned out that they were brothers and sisters that she didn't even know existed. They were blatantly asking her where their fathers valuables were at. One came walking by with a wristwatch in her hand, saying that all she got was a crummy watch.
Oh yeah.... they jimmied to door to get into the place.

a reply to: JAGStorm

When me and my wife split up i moved in for what was to be a few days with my grandmother. After about a week she asked me to just stay to help around the house. She still had a couple acres that needed taking care of, small chores around the house like fix a leaky faucet, change the lights in the chandeliers, etc. things she would say "you need a man around the house for". While i did that one of may aunts would make sure she would get to the doctors and groceries etc. Just me and my aunt taking care of my grandmother, her mother. My grandmother died less than 24 hours of being put in a home (which by the way was a huge fear of hers) Low and behold here came the rest of the family like vultures to a carcass. I watched aand the more that happened the more PO'd i got until i finally lost it in front of all of them. Told them exactly how i felt. Today i have little to no contact with them. My cousin sent me an invite to a family get together in the Smokies. My reponse was "After Ma's funeral you really think i want to be around you people?" Grandma passed almost 15 years go, i today i still prefer to just have nothing to do with them. Even drove a wedge between me and my parents.

a reply to: JAGStorm

I hear ya. Seen it over and over



I will say though it's better than watching elderly care homes, hospitals and pharma companies taking everything they've worked their lives for instead.

Such people have no shame and are nothing but vultures.

A legal representative should have taken charge of the estate especially if he left a will, if he did leave a will there actions may very well be legally theft if the items they took were NOT left to them.

A-yup, my late grandmother used to tell us all KIIIIINDS of stories about our greedy great-aunts (her brothers' wives) suddenly showing up out of the blue whenever someone died, hoping to pick through the belated's # for things of value first. And they had a knack for theft when people were too busy dealing with readying funeral stuff instead of watching the deceased's house like a hawk.

It almost came to physical blows once for my grandmother after her own mother (my great-grandmother) died. My grandmother lived across the country, so these slimy #s had a head start before they couldn't pick through stuff anymore, even the fastest flight still gave them time.

They made the mistake of Five Finger Discounting my grandmother's own Christening gown & jewelry that her parents kept, bitch aunts poofed the box before she could get it herself. All because the baby ring (item of highest value in the box) was 22 kt. They denied taking it, of course, but it was never found. Amazing how it vanished out of a locked antique wooden travel trunk, huh?

Nobody could prove it was them, but everyone freaking knows it was them, their house visits timing and the missing stuff's timing always lined up. They were just so good at it that there was no way to prove it, no one ever saw them pocket stuff (they didn't take anything when they were watched) and no one ever found anything that went missing. but once it was gone, it was GONE.

Not the first time they stole anything of high value, there's still a missing collection of high value little antique figurines, and several missing (and papered, good luck selling them, butt munches) Faberge eggs. My great-grandmother had early-onset Alzheimer's, so these were collections she was working on before her mind started to go.

When she finally couldn't take care of herself anymore, my grandmother moved in and was her caregiver for decades. That lasted until the 90's, when my grandmother physically couldn't do it herself anymore and had to move her to a nursing home.

After that, since my grandmother, and her brothers, all had keys to the house to maintain it, well...gold mine for Sticky Fingers Aunties looking for small, valuable items. Just lift the house key from where it's kept when the husbands aren't around, go help yourself, and oh yeah, not enough neighbors close enough to the house to actually see if you removed anything.

My great-aunts really suck as humans. And they didn't even come from poverty, they come from quite old money & are still dripping in it. Not that coming from a poverty background would ever justify theft, but I can't figure out how the rich justify it.

This has happened a couple of times with my inlaws. My family was always too poor and had nothing to leave, not as it worried me because I believe that people aught to spend any money on themselves before they die. I could not live with myself to "profit" on what someone else had earned through their lives.
My best friend died last year, I tried to advise him but his daughter laid the guilt trip on him. In just under a year before he died she said she was in debt. He sold his house so she could clear her debt and buy a house. With his house gone his daughter said he could live with her, then he had cancer. Then she wanted him out of the house. She got control of his finance by making him do internet banking, which baffled him. Over a period of 10 months she had over £120,000 and he died with nothing. The nasty ones don't wait for them to die, they have it off them while they are alive.

a reply to: crayzeed

My sibling tried to do that with my folks. She wanted to separate a couple married 50 YEARS in their finals days. Have you ever heard of anything so evil!!! Who in their right mind would want to do that?

a reply to: Nyiah

Nobody could prove it was them, but everyone freaking knows it was them, their house visits timing and the missing stuff's timing always lined up. They were just so good at it that there was no way to prove it, no one ever saw them pocket stuff (they didn't take anything when they were watched) and no one ever found anything that went missing. but once it was gone, it was GONE.

At least they tried to hide it. Our relatives were blatant!!! Sickening.
I was so upset that they didn’t even give my husband 24 HOURS to grieve, not even one day.
I also believe that people that take things that aren’t meant for them will had bad juju.
I’ve seen it so many times.