posted on Sep, 18 2021 @ 10:57 PM
First of all, I would like to thank Member robsmith for his excellent thread that, strangely enough, inspired this one. I thought that this would be
an interesting topic amongst some. I know that those who know me find my embracing of celibacy to be odd to their minds, very distant from their
perceptions and reality. I'm starting this thread to simply discuss the topic openly, hopefully get some opinions or stories from others and answer
any questions that are asked (seriously, I have no shame and don't mind discussing this subject at all...otherwise I wouldn't have begun this thread
I suppose). So let's begin...
I am what I call a true celibate. That means that I have, honestly, through years of prayer and fasting, removed myself not only from the act of sex,
but from the desire thereof...completely. I am 46, financially independent, an accomplished musician and considered very handsome (though I would say
much more ruggedly so now). I say those things to simply say that I am not societally ousted from sex. I could engage in such activity if I chose,
but I genuinely do not wish to. I've been a drinker pretty much my whole life, and it has caused problems. Subsequently, I have logged my time in
the halls of AA. There is a saying (one of many) in AA...dry drunk. AA is an agnostic program that is designed to lead the participant to a
spiritual awakening (with the higher power of their own understanding) in order to fill the void inside of that person that they had previously
satiated with alcohol. A dry drunk achieves the end of cessation from drink, but never finds the spirit of replacement. Hence, they are typically
known as angry, grumpy people (that's what that name infers). A dry drunk still wants to drink, but they use will and discipline to keep them from
it, and thereby find no release or joy in their sobriety. This is a metaphor for the celibate who simply withholds sex from their life without
finding their way through to the prerequisite over-coming of the desire.
Celibacy (true celibacy) is the greatest achievement of my life. It has opened up my life in ways I never could have possibly imagined. First of
all, it has obviously altered drastically my dynamic with women. Make no mistake, I have not always been a celibate, in fact I was quite the opposite
for a long time. I think one reason I'm so comfortable with my celibacy now is that I was able to partake in more sex throughout my life than any
man should probably ever deserve. But that monster morphed inside of me until there was something there that I simply hated. I could no longer see
women as people, humans, someones mother, someones sister...no, they were all just objects of sex. I look back at that viewpoint and shudder.
Now, however, I can see the other side of that, and that is a beautiful gift of celibacy. I hold beautiful and deep conversations with women because,
and believe me, they know whether your talking with them honestly or with an agenda. Lifetimes of experience over generations have made it so. Also,
as an almost ironic result, women truly love me. I think I'm just cute to them now, but that's great. I love women, and finding myself in welcome
and loving grace with them is a gift.
Also, celibacy has been a powerful tool for me to take my power back. I'm going to tell you a little secret. Don't tell anyone, because nobody
knows about this, and I wouldn't want it getting out. Ok, here goes. Women use sex as a weapon. Whaaaaat? Did I say that? Was that out loud!?
Ok, yes, it's true. Women move men around like pieces on a board and believe me when I say that it is sex that gives them that power (begin the
flaming now if need be, but I'm not backing down on that one...it's simply true). Having removed myself from any want or need for sexual relations
I am no longer influenced by such things. Make no mistake, I am in NO way denigrating women whom I love and respect with all my heart. Neither am I
in any way saying that women are not powerful of their own volition...that would be ridiculous. I am simply saying that many women in this world know
how to get a man to eat an apple.
I've always felt very much like Paul. Paul was an avowed celibate. Some even say that it was his preaching of celibacy that caused his murder
(women who were following his teachings apparently began to embrace celibacy and this did not sit well with the men). Makes sense. Paul did say,
however, I would rather that you were like me (a celibate), but if you cannot be then marry. Also makes sense.
I have no idea what any of your typically smart and smart assed minds are thinking about this thread, but it was fun writing it and hopefully might
spark some interest in a subject not often discussed. I am not advocating this as a life-style for any except those who would want it. Sex is a
natural and beautiful part of life. If it weren't for it, I wouldn't be here to type this. For me, this life-style works, and that's all that
matters...
Peace...