Lost my Mama today

Sorry for your loss, OP. I lost my mom 5 years ago to cancer.

I lost my dad last year. Didn't get to say goodbye. Hadn't spoken to him in quite a while prior to his death. The memorial service was cancelled due to covid.

It has been hard. No siblings, no other close family other than my wife. Didn't even get many kind words from so-called "friends."

The internet is an ugly place sometimes, but it's nice to see people can put aside their differences for a minute to console a fellow human who has just suffered a loss.

May the kindness and love in this thread comfort you in your time of grief.

a reply to: Farlander

It has been hard. No siblings, no other close family other than my wife. Didn't even get many kind words from so-called "friends."

I have two siblings and various family.
I was there alone with both of my parents at the end. It was sad.

The pastor came in to talk to me. She said well, “we know who the strong one is”. Somehow that made me feel better even though I already knew it, hearing the words validated it somehow.

So sorry for your loss. She'll live on in your memories forever.

a reply to: JAGStorm

Hey jagstorm,
I know we don’t like know know each other and that’s okay. I can feel your pain through all your words. I know how it feels to lose a mom too. I just want you to know that I’m here for you if you ever need a chat.

I know death is never easy. It looks like you have a lot of love from the ats fam; that is very beautiful to me.

I absolutely love how even though a person is gone, and we can’t physically touch them, their memories are alive in us. We keep them alive in our hearts and minds.

I wish you so much peace and love and oh so many hugs ~~~>

originally posted by: JAGStorm
It still feels surreal.

I was there holding her hand, a few breaths and she was gone. Just like that.
My heart sank to my feet. An overwhelming sadness like I never felt before came over me.

She had been sick for a while. My dad passed a little over a month ago. She was fighting the cancer pretty well until
he passed. After he was gone she just gave up and her cancer ravaged her little body. I am convinced that there is a big
component of cancer that is mental. She did not do Chemo, but she did do immunotherapy. She told me after one of the immunotherapy sessions she felt like it has hastened the spreading of her cancer.

They say you don't really grow up until your parents are gone, and now I know exactly what that means.
Even though I've been in a fog the last six months, the family emergencies and dramas surrounding it has shed clarity on
so many things. I saw first hand who my true friends are. I saw first hand how some of my family members are truly awful people.
I saw who was strong and who was weak. I saw those same things in myself. I thought back when loved ones lost their loved ones.
I wonder if I supported them enough. I hope I was a good friend in a time of need. Death sure does bring a lot of reflection...

They often say be nice to people because you never know what they are going through. Please listen to those words. They are very true.
Maybe it's a deliver driver, or the person working fast food. Your coworker, your mail person. I pray for more humanity and less vitriol.

There are some paranormal things that happened surrounding my moms death. I will save that for another day. For now, please if your parents are still alive, give them a call, a hug, and let them know you appreciate them.

condolences bro. There is nothing I can say that will make it easier or bring her back. I lost my 60 year old mother to cancer on 28 Apr 2019. It was shocking and devastating. Your mom likely suffered from a broken heart too losing your father. She’s not suffering anymore.

a reply to: JAGStorm
I am so sorry for your loss. I can not claim to know what you went through but...
As a woman I can say loosing Mom was like loosing myself , I had to re-invent me.
I witnessed her fall apart over so many years to cancer and complications. The last two months I barely left her bedside.

Your post is so heartfelt and full of a wisdom we can only gain through trials.
WIS hugs
Take your time, immerse your self in all your feelings.

My condolences to you may you be surrounded by love and all the memories you will hold of her....

I'm sorry to hear this, my grandmother died next to me but I can't even conceive the loss of my parents, they are getting up there in years and I'm dreading the day I lose them.

originally posted by: RussianSpy
I'm sorry to hear this, my grandmother died next to me but I can't even conceive the loss of my parents, they are getting up there in years and I'm dreading the day I lose them.

Enjoy every second now, talk to them about everything.

There are no words JAG , But I know your pain.

nothing changes us like the Death of a loved one especially a mother or father , don't let the pain turn inwards use it .

a reply to: JAGStorm

JAGS! I apologize I just read this thread. Such a terrible loss, in such a short period of time no less. So very sorry to hear about your Mom and your Dad, I wish I could tell ya that feeling ever goes away but it does at least get a little less sharp. Even reading something like this is enough to bring you to tears no matter how many years have passed.

Looking forward to hearing the paranormal stories when you are feeling up to it. But it sounds like you are doing the best things you can do right now, which is anything that keeps your head above water

You probably heard this a million times already, and no doubt have no shortage in friends to call upon, but if you need to talk I am always available

Hang in there JAGS, cancer is a real S.O.B.

Hugs for you. -JB

(Those paranormal things you mention prove there is more than we can see, touch or feel. There is more. Something "else" out there. I think its beautiful, personally)

Love and condolences from the freek across the waves. I am saddened for your loss and that is honest Aussie truth. I have sent my energy and support to you and I hope it boosts you when it gets to you.
Be brave.



a reply to: JAGStorm

Every word so true. I haven't lost my mom yet but I lost my father and all my grandparents. So true about finding out how your family really is. True colors seem to come out when you have births and deaths. It's a sad and happy truth of life.

a reply to: JAGStorm

a reply to: jeffsfrye

How very true

When my folks passed, the family tore their house apart for valuables. My Dads silver collection was willed to me, but it mysteriously vanished along with any sort of narcotic medication and my Moms jewlerly. A can full of cash dating from the 20s, 30s and40s also gone

Meanwhile, I couldn't care less I just wanted the things that meant most to them. Tools, this wool blanket my Mother made by hand during the depression, Dads guns, things to remember them by.

Plus, My Mom had already given a few of her favorite rings, ear rings that sort of thing to my wife a few years before she passed. We passed them down to the girls. Never cared about the "valuable" stuff....none of it was worth anything to us, and the "worthless" things meant the most

a reply to: JAGStorm

Condolences.

a reply to: JBurns

Meanwhile, I couldn't care less I just wanted the things that meant most to them.

I visited my parents several years ago. They gave me a suitcase of "stuff". I asked them why they said if they passed it would disappear.

God will bless you for your struggle