To a very great degree, this depends on the space that you allow
people around you to occupy in your life.
Loving, caring, being kind always brings with it, in this world, the possibility of loss, of taking a risk on somebody and of being abused or taken
advantage of. It is incumbent on you to decide where the line is that you will not allow people to cross, then to firmly say, "Here and no more," when
they attempt to transgress it.
My mother is a very giving person. I cannot count the times I've told her, "Mama, don't do it, don't help, don't lend, don't go," and she's ignored me
because "they needed her," or her money or her house or her time. Then I'm the one she comes and complains to when they piss on her. I finally told
her that I didn't want to hear it, that I'd tried to warn her many times and she wouldn't listen, so I could do nothing about it after the fact.
A drug addict relative - niece by previous marriage - was planning on returning to town once. My mother was about to offer her a place to stay. This
woman has a history of taking advantage of people. When I found out, I called her sister and told her that if the woman came to live with my mother, I
would contact local law enforcement, inform them of her record and ask them to keep an eye on her so that my mother wold not be taken advantage of.
The woman backed off and did not come. Pissed off the sister. Pissed off my mother. Probably pissed off the junkie, but I couldn't care less. My
mother could not but say, "yes."
In short, if you let people piss on you, you can't complain about being all wet.
Draw the line. Establish your boundaries. Learn to say NO! when you need to, and live life.
edit on 2020 9 07 by incoserv because: what's it to ya?