By all means officer.

An undercover cop called at my farm in the sticks yesterday evening...
“I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs”, he said.

“By all means officer, just don’t go in that field over there”, I replied.

The cop exploded, saying “Do you know who the # I am?! I have the authority of the government with me!”, he shouted before pulling a badge out of his back pocket, “Do you see this #ing badge?! This badge means I can do what I want and I’ll go wherever the # I want, have I made myself clear?!”

I nodded politely, apologised, and went about my work. A short while later, I hear loud screams, looked up and saw the cop running for his life being chased by my angry bull. With each step, the bull was gaining ground and he seemed sure to be gored before he reached safety. The officer looked terrified and continued to run for his life.

I threw down my tools, immediately ran to the edge of the fence and shouted at the top of my lungs,

“Your badge, show him your #ing badge!”

originally posted by: hopenotfeariswhatweneed
An undercover cop called at my farm in the sticks yesterday evening...
“I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs”, he said.

“By all means officer, just don’t go in that field over there”, I replied.

The cop exploded, saying “Do you know who the # I am?! I have the authority of the government with me!”, he shouted before pulling a badge out of his back pocket, “Do you see this #ing badge?! This badge means I can do what I want and I’ll go wherever the # I want, have I made myself clear?!”

I nodded politely, apologised, and went about my work. A short while later, I hear loud screams, looked up and saw the cop running for his life being chased by my angry bull. With each step, the bull was gaining ground and he seemed sure to be gored before he reached safety. The officer looked terrified and continued to run for his life.

I threw down my tools, immediately ran to the edge of the fence and shouted at the top of my lungs,

“Your badge, show him your #ing badge!”

I found it disturbing that he didn’t know who he is lol

a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

More than a joke, it's a lot to learn about this story.

A badge doesn't mean too much in some places of the country these days, sadly.

a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed


That was too good.
I've got no comeback.

Cows and deer will eat the tall green stuff first...






And then get the munchies and eat every growing thing in sight!

a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

Back in the old days this narc was pressuring a friend of mine to sell him some pot.

So my friend went into his kitchen and put some freshly dried herbs into a baggie and brought them to the narc.

"Here ya go."

Then the narc pulled out his badge and said, "You're under arrest for selling a controlled substance."

Then the narc opened the bag and gave it a sniff, "What the hell? This isn't pot."

My friend was like, "I never said it was. And I can have this recording played to the judge in which never in our conversations did I ever once say the word 'pot'."

originally posted by: pthena
a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

Back in the old days this narc was pressuring a friend of mine to sell him some pot.

So my friend went into his kitchen and put some freshly dried herbs into a baggie and brought them to the narc.

"Here ya go."

Then the narc pulled out his badge and said, "You're under arrest for selling a controlled substance."

Then the narc opened the bag and gave it a sniff, "What the hell? This isn't pot."

My friend was like, "I never said it was. And I can have this recording played to the judge in which never in our conversations did I ever once say the word 'pot'."

Pretty slack police work there, would be interesting to see if the cop would get in trouble if something like that got to court.

a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

It was actually one of those woulda/coulda/shoulda stories.

My friend was explaining why he had to do community service.
He knew the guy was a narc. But he was so pathetic about wanting some dope, "Everyone knows I'm a narc, and I really, really need some pot. I'm hurting man, and no one will sell to me."

So he took his money, scored, brought the pot to him and got busted. Out of pity !!!

So I told my friend, "Well look, if you're paying "your debt to society", I'm society, and I don't think you owe me anything. How about I make up a petition and get all the signatures of society, saying you don't owe us anything."

Then he said, "Nah. I only got 20 hrs. left. I can have that done before you get the signatures."

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Any way. I thought my first modified version was better.

a reply to: pthena

My bad, should never let the truth get in the way of a good story.