Dream Reality Confusion

I'm not sure where to share this, but it's something that I don't really want to share with a lot of people that I actually know.

Quick link, to explain what this is:

psycnet.apa.org...

I suffer from this, well, I think I do. As soon as I fall asleep, I am dreaming, and I dream until I wake up. Even if I doze off for 3 seconds, I already dreamed something in those 3 seconds. So, for me, there is no separation, no wall between reality and the dream world.

On top of this, I dream very vivid dreams. Then I dream the same dreams over and over. I just read about this Dream Reality Confusion a couple of weeks ago, after waking from a dream that goes back decades that I have come to accept as a reality.

The dream happens in my late teen years, right before I join the military. Without going into details, let's say I'm hanging with some friends, and we're drinking and partaking in other activities. Something happens to someone who is not really part of our "group". An outsider. Something awful. I am more of a bystander in the activities, since I'm pretty much wasted.

For years I thought this was a reality. I was relieved that I joined the military and got out of there before anyone got into trouble. I felt safe.

But after waking from this dream the other day, I decided to look for proof that this event happened. Surely there would be news articles. After hours of searching, I found nothing. Then I looked up my "issue" and came across this. Now I'm questioning a lot of my own "reality".

And just last night I dreamed about questioning myself inside my own dream, if that makes any sense.

I'm sharing this to get it off my chest more than anything.

I can relate to a bit of that.

any drugs or alcohol?

Not passing judgement. But If yes, I believe they would contribute to the confusion. If yes, I would recommend ceasing.


a reply to: whatmakesyouright

As the poster says above... and substances involved? Or even any ‘withdrawal’ or sporadic use of substances involved? That can increase vividity.

What about your forces days... you say no trouble but did you see combat? Even if you didn’t feel fear the subconscious could be reacting.

I guess you could say I'm recovering from drinking heavily. I'm only drinking on the weekends now, but I was up to about 8 IPA's a day at one point.