More COVID deaths I bet!

So, screw all the idiots who drank bleach, that gene pool needed cleaning anyway! People are idiots.

But what about all the people who ate their living room couch when they ran out of Doritos?

What about the people who wiped their *** with 40 grit sandpaper for 3 months because they couldn't find TP?

What about all the people who got deathly ill from eating that 17 million year old Pterodactyl wing at the very bottom of the freezer? You know, the thing under the one foot of frost and freezer burn on that 20lb super-pack of chicken you got at Costco in 1987 and swore you'd eat...this time.

What about the people now who just mainline bottom shelf vodka (screw the soda), or have a permanent Everclear IV stuck in their arm? The ones who now have to carry their fatty, inflamed, liver around in a shopping cart? What about them?

What about all the children **GASP** who's parents all had nervous breakdowns trying to homeschool them and just said to hell with it and locked them in the shed for the past two months??? How about them, huh? The CHILDREN for cripes sakes! **GASP!**

And more about the children **GASP!** What about the children who managed to escape the shed and who now roam around like wild animals, feral and unwashed animals, in the forests eating sticks and rocks, while their parents "WFH"?

What about 'Rex', you know, the guy with the six pack abs who now weighs 650lbs and is addicted to Lil Debbies cakes, Donettes and Twinkies? The 'Rex' who now watches reruns of 'Days of our Lives' on channel #643 24x7.

Or Billy, the once bright kid, who has now mind-melded with 'Call of Duty XXXXVVII; the Beginning' and now doesn't have a pulse unless the game controller is plugged in.

Or Suzy, who used to break the internet because she was so HOT in Yoga pants, but now can't manage to reach the bon-bons on the coffee table because she's a gigantic SPERM WHALE in stained polyester clown pants? The one who now has a permanent insulin I.V. stabbed into her forehead. What about her, huh?

And what about all those beloved "pets", some of them partially eaten, other's running wild, some of them wildly obese from eating bon-bons off the coffee table and then skidding their butt across the carpet from neglect?

Or parents who just went and jumped off a bridge because their internet bill was $63,450.00 dollars last month!??

Are all these things going to be counted as COVID-19 statistics and deaths too????

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

You forgot dragging politicians from their homes to be fed to beasts. Those should certainly count as Covid-related deaths.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Sounds like you've been spending a whole lot of time on the Facebook.
And I guess that since I recognize that I've been spending too much time there as well!

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Agreed, they actually SHOULD be counted as COVID deaths!

Drag their squealing porky little carcasses from their cozy little sty's and skewer them to slow roast over a bed of smoldering manure and feed their rotting entrails to the NY sewer rats, piece by squealing little piece!

a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

Never been there! Don't even have an account.

Well, of course they should be considered COVID deaths, they were caused by the overreaction to the virus.

BBQ Pterodactyl wings sound pretty good to me. I do have four two foot times four foot stainless steel mine grates to make a BBQ out of that would handle two wings. I also have lots of broken trees for firewood. num num

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

What about all the people who got deathly ill from eating that 17 million year old Pterodactyl wing at the very bottom of the freezer? You know, the thing under the one foot of frost and freezer burn on that 20lb super-pack of chicken you got at Costco in 1987 and swore you'd eat...this time.

Whatchu talkin about?

I can't get my kids to eat day old, neatly packaged and well refrigerated leftovers.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I think theres actually a good argument for categorizing them as "covid-related"

Buuuuut...

That little term right there has been all doublespeak'd into oblivion, so maybe not.

So damn tricky to talk about any of it.

could be some great artwork coming out of this, or some excellent novels written.could be

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

You mean. . . . . Kevin's family.


I really hate Kevin

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

Never been there! Don't even have an account.

Nearly every thing you mentioned is a FB meme. When I try to escape them by staying away from there people send them to me in messages or texts. There is no escaping the meme gods!

PUT
ON
A
HAPPY
FACE

originally posted by: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
a reply to: GeauxHomeYoureDrunk

Never been there! Don't even have an account.

Nearly every thing you mentioned is a FB meme. When I try to escape them by staying away from there people send them to me in messages or texts. There is no escaping the meme gods!

No there isn't....the china bat flu isn't to be trifled with!!

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk
Thanks for this thread. Very funny and you made good points as well.

a reply to: olaru12

Hilarious post! I laughed my ass off reading it.