My 5 point plan to stop Americans leaving America

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: IkNOwSTuff

As an internet expert on America and Americans, I can say that your plan has merit.


Although I would try a different approach if you want to keep Americans away.


Just tell America that the rest of the world has given up elevators and escalators.

All Americans are fat. We are grossly obese and hate to use stairs. I'm breaking out in a sweat right now because I typed too fast.

If Americans even "thought" about exercise, they'd run (well, waddle) away from every country.

You're welcome!

Quit televising the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NASCAR or NCAA sports outside of the United States.

Quit televising "American Idol", "The Bachelor/ Bachelorette", "America's Got Talent" or "The Kardashians" outside of the United States.

I call it "electronic sequestering"... it would keep about 98% of us on native soil...

The other 2% watch PBS, and the BBC. They're free ranging nomads, traveling from one music festival to the next...

a reply to: IkNOwSTuff

We're lucky here in oz, Americans rarely visit as we have too many spiders and snakes and sharks with laser beams, oh a drop bears, so we're safe.

TOSOTC is basically taking the piss and is doing it for #s and giggles, one would have to be a little retarded to have missed that little detail.

a reply to: IkNOwSTuff
You fool. That's impossible. You cannot make them believe they are isolated and not leave for the simple fact of their defence forces. Now it would work if their defence military were actually IN America to defend it, but they aint. They're all trooping around the world in their "defensive" overseas stations and their "defensive" flotillas. Silly man.