Seeking A Pen Pal

Hi all,

I am seeking a pen pal to converse with on all matters of life.

I am in a work from home B2B sales role, had a baby 14 months ago and am no longer participating in organised sport. All of these factors have severely reduce my amount of social interaction which at times leaves me feeling a bit lonesome and disconnected with the outside world.

Despite this I am generally quite a happy and optimistic person though would appreciate getting in touch with like minded individuals to communicate via email. We can discuss any number of topics you may not feel comfortable sharing with those close to you.

I am a 30 year old married male from Australia with interest in; politics, religion, philosophy, the occult, sport, business and general life.

I have no age, gender or race preference as to whom I communicate with and can ensure reciprocal understanding, empathy and communication.

a reply to: IAMALLYETALLIAM

I certainly understand your sentiment. I am also a parent of young children, and your physical social footprint decreases by necessity.
I would suggest setting up nights with current friends rather than going for a pen pal.
You already post to this site, which granted is a public rather than private forum. But why would you need additional private interactions beyond what you have access to because of your contacts in your phone?

a reply to: randomtangentsrme

I see my friends as much as possible and certainly participate on here.

I guess I am looking for a more personal interaction without the noise of comments etc, to connect with somebody in another part of the world and discuss matters I may not feel comfortable with my friends in the comfort of relative anonymity.

a reply to: IAMALLYETALLIAM

I live in Oregon, South West part of the state...8 yr d daughter. Wife and I are foragers, and gold miners now. I have a bigshot job, who cares?

We used to own a permaculture farm

originally posted by: IAMALLYETALLIAM
a reply to: randomtangentsrme

I see my friends as much as possible and certainly participate on here.

I guess I am looking for a more personal interaction without the noise of comments etc, to connect with somebody in another part of the world and discuss matters I may not feel comfortable with my friends in the comfort of relative anonymity.

This sounds like you might be interested in hiding your thoughts, or are otherwise insecure discussing them in either a public forum, or in the public at large. While I can understand that, as I often entertain an idea in private before suggesting it to a friend group (to pick apart) , before coming to a conclusion.

I am not sure of how healthy this is in the long term. It's one of the reasons I have become more active on ATS since my children have arrived. It's a greater diversity of thought than my own friends, so I have a not biased perspective (or many biased perspectives) on any situation.

a reply to: IAMALLYETALLIAM

I can't spell worth #, but all the best on finding a pal to pen with.

a reply to: randomtangentsrme

Thanks for the insight, you may very well be correct and whilst I usually consider myself to be quite self aware I have missed the potentially unhealthy aspect.

It is definitely a reason I have Re-joined ATS.

I guess I have a degree of anxiety associated with bearing too much of myself to my friends and acquaintances.

a reply to: BlueJacket

Sounds like you are living the dream my friend.

originally posted by: IAMALLYETALLIAM
a reply to: randomtangentsrme

I see my friends as much as possible and certainly participate on here.

I guess I am looking for a more personal interaction without the noise of comments etc, to connect with somebody in another part of the world and discuss matters I may not feel comfortable with my friends in the comfort of relative anonymity.

I'd suggest not seeking that. It will only lead to disappointment. You'll put all the effort in and the other party will not, and they will get angry when you ask why it is that way, making excuses as to why but still having time for everything else.

Trust me, people may seem genuine at first, but they will lapse, and you'll find you're trying to discuss things, and they're uninterested.

Unless it is a genuine friendship from the start, and made without trying, it will end up feeling forced and you'll be right back where you started.

As with any relationship, I always follow the concept of it being a fart.. If you have to force it, it's probably crap.

a reply to: gallop

Hahaha hilarious!

Thanks for the reply though, you guys are right, I don’t think a pen pal will the void of human interaction I feel.

Guess I’ll just get closer with my friends who exist on paper between cardboard covers

originally posted by: IAMALLYETALLIAM
a reply to: gallop

Hahaha hilarious!

Thanks for the reply though, you guys are right, I don’t think a pen pal will the void of human interaction I feel.

Guess I’ll just get closer with my friends who exist on paper between cardboard covers

Mine are digital representations of the same things. My eyesight is terrible, but my hearing is still in stereo!!

When I was in primary school the class was given the names of the kids in another school in another country, and we could pick someone to become a pen pal with. Things were so different back then though. I don't think I ever got a reply from mine, but for all we knew, the teacher was just giving us something to do..

I don't discount the idea of what you propose, hey.. if it happens and it's something unique, don't let people dissuade that.. especially me, lol, I tend to get verbose and can talk the ears off a corn cob.

My thing was to not seek it out, especially from here, unless you already know someone well. There have been many relationships formed from ATS, even marriages. Long distance communication, and the mourning of those who have passed.

But they didn't seek each other out for the purpose of it.. just happened. a natural evolution of similar ideas, leading to an intimate understanding of each other. Much like real life, how we get to know people, some become our best of friends, others more, some we learn to steer clear from and some we know well of simply in passing.

Anyhoo, don't forget, we cannot predict the future. And you don't catch fish without casting out.

Oi Oi Oi from a fellow straya'n..

Might want to consider narrowing your focus to a specific topic or 2, it will be easier to find persons genuinely interested in correspondence. Then expand from there. Good Luck

The OP is onto something though, and it's actually a good thing. I had an interesting conversation with a work colleague from Ecuador a couple months ago. He could barely speak English, and my Latin American Spanish is not real good, but we managed to have a really interesting conversation anyway.

Our discussion started over language. He was in the process of trying to learn better English, and I was doing the same thing with Spanish. At one point another colleague brought up the topic of handwriting (I'm kind of a nut about all things hand writing including paper, pens and pencils, etc.). This same colleague stated that I had very neat notes and how he was impressed by this. (I used to be a draftsman a long time ago, so it's just this thing with me). Anyway, I noticed my Ecuadoran colleague had a certain brand of pen which I also use from time to time (a LAMY). So the discussion continued to handwriting and eventually lead to each of the 4 of us (we were at lunch in Peru) exchanging handwriting samples. Incidentally, my Ecuadoran colleague's handwriting was much better than even my own.

What was interesting was we were all creating samples in cursive writing, not printed words. We all commented on how cursive writing was almost a lost form of writing these days, very few use it now. It seems many schools have stopped teaching it altogether. One of our other guys, a fellow from Madrid, asked myself and my Ecuadoran colleague why we had such interest in pens, paper and writing. Our response was almost identical, and I thought very interesting. It went something like this...

When was the last time you received a handwritten letter from someone? In today's world of email and digital communications, a hand written letter is almost unheard of.

Everyone heartily agreed. Almost simultaneously, my Ecuadoran colleague and I both stated...

"A handwritten letter is like a gift to someone" Certainly to the person who receives it anyway. I commented that I used to write hand written letters, on dedicated stationery, to my parents before they passed all the time. I would use a fountain pen to write them and even seal them with a wax seal. It was great fun for me to do, and my Mom and Dad cherished the communications. When my sisters and I were cleaning out my parents estate after Mom passed I found a box, and in that box were all the letters I had sent. In talking with some of Mom's friends they commented how she would always bring them out and share the letters with them. Heh, I was a mini-celebrity to the old folks circle and didn't even know it. Mom's next door neighbor said her and a friend used to constantly ask Mom if she had received any more letters, and how they eagerly awaited them. I never knew.

It wasn't as though my letters contained any sort of an epic tale, they were just friendly letters talking about the various goings on and ramblings from the "Last Outpost" as I call it.

When I returned home I was telling my wife about this story. Without saying a word she left the room and came back with a box...containing all the letters I had written to her also while I was away in SE Asia. I never knew.

So, there is something to be said for a 'pen pal', someone willing to take the time to pen a letter and share a piece of their life with someone else. The power of the written word is seen by the receiver as a true 'gift', and has a lot more meaning in a day and age where the digital world around us bleaches out and "dumbs down" all emotion. I never knew.

Knee highs... ball hammers... freezers...Vegas... stockings n stuff...

Then I read that you are a bloke...

Brit in France and open to any discussion as a pen pal as long as American politics are not involved.

Just send me a U2U (the white envelope on the top right of your screen when you scroll up in your MY ATS.

Lags

a reply to: Lagomorphe

To the OP,

I would think Lags might have some pretty interesting stuff to say, and you might even find a lot in common.

I would strongly recommend taking Lags up on the offer.

a reply to: Artemis12

when i joined ats some git pulled me up over my spelling i use a spell check now just to be sure

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
a reply to: Lagomorphe

To the OP,

I would think Lags might have some pretty interesting stuff to say, and you might even find a lot in common.

I would strongly recommend taking Lags up on the offer.

The Vegas story with the pig masks, ball hammers etc never happened...

a reply to: IAMALLYETALLIAM

I know exactly what you are looking for.

You have friends, but these people do not share the deepest interests that you do, the ones that you want to express and dig down deep into.

I have the nearest and dearest friends, those that I would trust my life with and my children's lives with, but they have laughed at my beliefs, the conspiracy thoughts that I am deeply interested in - they are just living in the day to day mode of any other "sheeple".

I want more!! Sometimes having conversations online can be the same once you find yourself sharing deeper thoughts. You think you've come to a site where everyone is open minded and suddenly you're being slammed, mocked, antagonized to explain your beliefs. I completely understand why you are seeking pen pals.

You just do what feels right to YOU!

Hi

I do understand, I think.

I’m 26 and have a baby ( turned one this month). The father left when she was 6 months and I moved out. Also lost my job because my boss was an inlaw.

Now it’s just me and the little one, quite hard to go out and see friends when you dont have a sitter. A friend stops by every week for about thirty minutes.

I’m saying this because I understand you might feel the need to look for more contacts

Good luck

originally posted by: hiddeninsite
a reply to: IAMALLYETALLIAM

I know exactly what you are looking for.

You have friends, but these people do not share the deepest interests that you do, the ones that you want to express and dig down deep into.

I have the nearest and dearest friends, those that I would trust my life with and my children's lives with, but they have laughed at my beliefs, the conspiracy thoughts that I am deeply interested in - they are just living in the day to day mode of any other "sheeple".

I want more!! Sometimes having conversations online can be the same once you find yourself sharing deeper thoughts. You think you've come to a site where everyone is open minded and suddenly you're being slammed, mocked, antagonized to explain your beliefs. I completely understand why you are seeking pen pals.

You just do what feels right to YOU!

Right you are.

They are also topics I may at times prefer not to discuss with those closest to me as, whilst discussing/exploring such subjects depending on the view I present may lead to a a misrepresentation of myself and change in the dynamic of the relationship with someone close to me.

It is also not easy to start conversations about religion, politics, magic etc. in the real world.

Thanks everybody for your replies- all considered and much appreciated.