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The Stoop

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posted on Nov, 10 2018 @ 05:02 PM
Ok, please go easy on me. I have not written anything in a very long time. I've had this story in my head for a while and I would like to share it with you. it is a work in progress and isn't finished yet. I've been writing it in bits and pieces. Adding to it, taking parts away. it is written horribly on my phone and I want to format it properly on my laptop. But for now, here is a first draft of how it starts. Any criticism is wanted and needed. I'm an amateur at this. please let me know if you would like for me to continue or just scrap the whole thing.

It was an ordinary morning on Quanto 8. The 2 suns rose and the morning paper was delivered. The coffee was hot and the sugar was sweet. This is the way our friend, Norpo Folegate liked it. Norpo is your run of the mill citizen of Quanto 8. He works, he is a good father to his 3 kids, he's a good husband. He pays his bills, he wants to be promoted to head supervisor at the Thorgo processing facility. He saves credits every 2 years to take his family on vacation. He's a stand up guy.

Norpo, poured his coffee in his mug and walked down the steps of his house to retrieve his morning paper. As Norpo bent over to grab his newspaper, his neighbor and closest friend, Raugool Gofrez, yelled from across the street.
"Norp! did you see that nersh last night? That was one Skrantor of a game!"

Raugool then walked really fast across the street, almost getting run over by a school bus full of children in the process.

"Neefin Splorkin Christ man! You almost died just now! But Yes! Unsplorkinbelievable! That call at the end of the 16th Qlonon was questionable though".

"The whole game was questionable "

"Well, at least the Drillers are in the playoffs "


""It's been 5 years!"

"Praise Meefort and the 12 Rocks!"

"Here here!"

"So, you have the day off?"

"Yeah, the next 2 weeks"

"Oh, that's right. Taking the family on vacation, "Planet Arnth", correct?"

"Earth, it's called planet Earth"

"Yes, that's it, Earf"


"That's what I said. Earth. Are you stoked?"

"Glook yes! I hear they have a food called "Tacos" and you can only get them on what they call "Choose Day".

"What day did they choose?"

"Probably "Friday". Friday seems like a good day to eat something called a taco"

"What is it made out of?"

"Animals, and something called "Torn Cortillas"

"You savage! They still eat animals over there?"


"Sounds absolutely splorkin delicious "

"That's why I'm going. They eat animals all day there. You can actually go up to a drive thru and order an animal fully cooked and dipped in shloglosh and deep fried"

"Man! I have got to go! You'll "fit in" right?

"Pretty much, I look like what they call "Asian", but I'm like a foot taller than the average Asian. Brenda and the kids should blend in easily....

"Brenda is black though"

"Not a problem, Earth has a whole continent full of them... You would fit in too my friend. You look like what is called a "Mexicrat". But you are probably 3 feet taller than the average Mexicrat" I think they are the creators of the "Taco".

"I think I feel like a Taco. I have got to go!"

"You should. You being a single guy, I'm sure they will welcome you with open arms. With those special tacos, I'm sure they worship dudes like you. You probably look like a God to them."

"I'm sure! I'm definitely going now. What else do they have there, Norp?"

"The Porbs live there, they've been living there for about 4000 years. They call themselves "Cats" now."


"They do"

"No splorkin way! How do they pass?"

"They dont say a word. They keep their mouths shut, keep to themselves and get this, the people of Earth are their slaves. They dont have to do anything. They are fed and housed."

"Typical. They are always saying they are descendants of Kings and Queens. It's that telepathy they use on you. Man, splork them. Splork them in the glonehole." be continued..?

edit on 10-11-2018 by galaga because: (no reason given)

edit on 10-11-2018 by galaga because: (no reason given)

edit on 10-11-2018 by galaga because: (no reason given)

edit on 10-11-2018 by galaga because: (no reason given)

posted on Nov, 10 2018 @ 06:26 PM
Norpo and Raugool both sitdown on the front steps of Norpos house. It looks very much like your typical New York Brownstone.

"No glook, Raugool, no splorkin glook. Splork them guys straight in their moms glonehole"

"Speaking of "gloneholes", how's your boss treating you and hows that promotion coming along?"

"Frank is always gonna be a glonehole."

"Gloneholes gonna glone"

Do you know what the mothersplorker asked me to do last week?"

"No. What?"

"That son of a narlar asked me to finish his reports on top of mine, 3 days early because he had "heard" there was going to be suprise inspection."

"So what did you do?"

"I finished them. All of them... And guess what? No splorkin inspection!"

"Son of a narlar!"

"I dont think there ever was an inspection. I think he just didn't want to complete his reports."

"Why did you do it?"

"I want that promotion. I want Brenda to be proud of me. I want Brendzilla and the kids to be comfortable. I mean, dont get me wrong, we're not hurting financially, not in the least. Glook, we're going on a vacation for Christ's sake. But the pay raise would be nice... Brenda is pregnant."

"No way! When will she hatch?"

"On the 7th day of the 9th moon"

"Well, congratulations man! Number 3!"


"4? Wait, there's Creb, Tyler and....don't tell me... .."


"Don't tell me!"

"Its Raugool "

"For reals?"

"You're kidding? Right?....Right?...You're totally not kidding. We named him after you, you glonehole!"

"Sometimes I think I smoke too much Cha Cha weed."

"I think so too."

.....there's more... lol.
edit on 10-11-2018 by galaga because: (no reason given)

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