Paranoid Wives!!

originally posted by: Nyiah

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk

So why am I so pissed? Sometimes you go the extra mile to make something really nice, even if it's temporary, and then you get a ration of S# about it which makes you just want to start breaking S#!! This is her dream kitchen (the one she's wanted all her life), and I'm spending about $150 grand on it...cut me some F#'ing slack already, would ya???

I'm going to give one for the Sensible Wives team and crack you upside the head Italian Mama style. $150 grand on a KITCHEN? Was that a typo, did you mean $15 grand? Why the hell would anyone spend as much as some houses cost on ONE room? o.O That boggles, I'd call Aug and DB and have them discretely dispose of my husband if he spent that much on only one room in the house, the hell.

Meh some of our customers spend $50,000 just on their counter tops for their kitchen.

originally posted by: DigginFoTroof
Some people have no concept of the value of a dollar, or worse, they do and there is a bigger problem in the picture.

Both Disk and I increased the value of our real estate, maybe you need us to educate you on this aspect of home ownership.

And even if that wasn't the case it's what I wanted, so I did it.

originally posted by: Nyiah
I'd call Aug and DB and have them discretely dispose of my husband if he spent that much on only one room in the house, the hell.

1-800-BOURBON

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Do you know why husbands die before their wives?



Because they can!

originally posted by: NthOther
White people. Lol.

Black people. MASSIVE lol.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

See, I hear you man, I really do.

But the thing is, that unless your wife has actually had the experience of putting together a bunch of physical labour, to produce a piece of furniture, or a work surface, or to lay a floor from scratch, or something similar... there is no way for her to appreciate the effort that putting that temporary top on represents.

To her, all it represents right now, is something other than what she was after. She won't, because she can't think about how much of a pain in the arse it is for you, to have to put all that work in on something that will not even be a part of the finished kitchen, essentially, work you have to do twice, and she can't think about that, because she does not understand, I am guessing, the sheer amount of graft involved.

You might be a bit too much of a superhero to her. Perhaps she has the impression that all this work you are doing is just water of a ducks back, because of how God damned capable you are. Perhaps you have given her the impression, by some means, that this workload going on in your kitchen is nothing to you, that the effort necessary to get any of it done is simply nil, because of how badass you are. I think if she realised that not only did you (I am guessing, but you seem like the sort of guy who would) do a master craftsmans job of putting down that temporary top, but that you did so knowing full well that all your hard work would be ripped out and replaced at some stage soon, and that the entire thing has been one heavy, drawn out, logistically cumbersome bitch of a thing to get to grips with, then she might have been less tempted to give you the aforementioned ration of %^$!

In short, she could try to do better at understanding how much work you have put in, getting the house sorted. But at the same time, you may need to explain to her that as badass as you are, you are not superman, and this work is physically and mentally demanding, it is NOT nothing, not something that can be overlooked or forgotten in a fit of pique, without a problem arising.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk
Oh FCD, I thought you knew how to do it.
I've been in the industry all my life (building and renovation work) and you've simple forgotten the one and only golden rule, no matter how you are browbeaten.
NEVER, EVER START A JOB WITHOUT ALL THE MATERIALS ON SITE.
Yeah, wait for the special worktop, only 4 weeks till delivery. OOps, the firm has a problem, can't be delivered for 12 weeks.
Ah, you wanted to start the job early to earn brownie points off the mrs. Don't work, first part not done on time you are in purgatory.
Kitchen? Not worth doing it in parts. Pay for her to go away for a couple of weeks and blitz the place, do it in one go.

a reply to: TrueBrit

Well, I don't know about all the 'badass' stuff, but thanks (I think)

😄

All I will say on the subject, is that there are always two sides to every story - and usually somewhere in the middle is the actual truth.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Thing is, in totally different ways, I have been in similar situations, in terms of people failing to appreciate what I do for them.

My friends, whom I love dearly, are very fond of doing these two things, that really annoy me.

First, they fail to understand that if they want me around at a function or a meet up, they need to tell me a few days in advance, so that I can budget for it, or organise cover at work if its during working hours.

Second, they have this strange habit of forgetting that I live at least 45 minutes from them by foot, and that it often takes about as long on a bus due to traffic problems. When they call me or text me ten minutes before they would like me to show up, then, when I arrive later than everyone else, give me a gentle ribbing for being so tardy, it makes me flip.

But, the reason they seem to think I can teleport, is that when they think about me, and the things they know I have done, like turning up at their door despite the force 9 blizzard blowing through town, or biblical amounts of torrential rain, this gives them the impression that I am some sort of wizard, unfazed by the trifling matter of limitations placed upon one by physics or finance. They don't think about me in the same way as they think of themselves, because they know THEIR limitations, and they know that I don't find myself limited by the same things to the same degree, they simply forget that I have ANY limitations.

Of course, I do have limitations. I cannot just decide to go for a drink, I have to plan for it. I cannot just decide to be anywhere in the borough in ten minutes, I have to catch a bus, or hitch a lift, or have time to walk the distance required, before being due to arrive. From my perspective, knowing my limitations as well as I do, it is easy to understand that I need time to do these things. But from theirs, I am just that wizard, that guy who lights cigarettes and cooking fires with a magnifying glass, who walks between raindrops, the fellow who marches into pounding blizzards, and doesn't give a damn in the slightest, because nothing stands between him and a beer, not chaos, not weather, not road closures, nothing.

Its only the fact that I know thats how their subconscious minds refer to me, that allows me to not be so pissed off when people wonder why I am not around as often as other people, or why I always rock up a little after, or in an effort to not be late, before everyone else. They don't understand that it takes an awful lot of physical effort, to be the kind of friend I am, that what isn't that big of a deal for friends who are closer geographically, is a significant physical or logistical exertion for me, because I live further away and have limited means. Thats why, when they rag on me for not being able to come out to a gig (because they didn't give me time to budget for it), or arriving late to an event, I know that what they are really saying is "But dude, you are a wizard. You don't have such petty, mortal concerns as transit time and physical stamina drain!".

I take their confusion as a compliment now, because its better for them, for me, for everyone, than trying to argue the point. And to be fair, its a damned sight better for things to be this way, than for my friends to feel that they can't invite me to things, because the insane things I have to do to get and do them, are such a big deal for me. I would rather be invited, and have to decline, than to hear from people less.

I see white people eating off their granite countertops - Ramen noodles! LOLOLOLOL