Pulling the race card when nobody has been racist

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

Poverty is as much about making poor choices as it is about anything else.

Sometimes, poor folks don't look poor, not because they aren't but because they don't "look" poor. When I taught in an inner city school, I had kids who used to brag about their moms taking them down to a local high end shopping center and turning them loose with $300 to spend on themselves for their birthday, and these were section 8/public assistance kids.

My parents never took public assistance, but I grew up one scant step above it ... barely. My parents would never, ever have dreamed of spending that much on a birthday, let alone letting either of us girls spend it on ourselves.

originally posted by: ketsuko
a reply to: CornishCeltGuy

Poverty is as much about making poor choices as it is about anything else.

Sometimes, poor folks don't look poor, not because they aren't but because they don't "look" poor. When I taught in an inner city school, I had kids who used to brag about their moms taking them down to a local high end shopping center and turning them loose with $300 to spend on themselves for their birthday, and these were section 8/public assistance kids.

My parents never took public assistance, but I grew up one scant step above it ... barely. My parents would never, ever have dreamed of spending that much on a birthday, let alone letting either of us girls spend it on ourselves.

Poverty is about poor choices? My dad tried to kill me and my mom. He shot himself when I was 5. My mom struggled to support the two of us. I saw some crazy stuff growing up in an impoverished area. My neighbor blew his pregnant wifes head off. My best friends dad hung himself in the front yard. We found him on the way to school in the morning. I was surrounded by hardcore drug addicts. I experienced more abuse then most people have in 10 lifetimes. The person I looked up most in life was a heroin addict. The reason I looked up to him was because he was the only one that didn't treat me like dirt. By the time I was 20 I was a train wreck mentally. I ended up getting schizophrenia. I now survive on a 3rd world income in the richest country on earth. I didn't get a choice in where my life ended up.

a reply to: wantsome

You made many choices along the way. Some may have been beyond your actual control to change due to circumstance. But each choice was yours to make and several would have likely improved your life is made differently

You are one of the brighter folks on ATS. You kicked my ass in a debate once or twice. One time you changed my opinion. I dont think you are as powerless against the rigors of life as you believe.

a reply to: wantsome

A lot of it is.

I watch my sister and brother-in-law struggle against it, and I watch them make a string of poor choices - one right after another.

Sure life deals you things beyond your control and having money helps, but it's not everything. If it were, there never would be celebrity suicides at the rates we see.

But generally speaking when I see people who ought to be shopping several grades lower than they are wearing stuff I won't buy myself because of its cost and boasting about the hundreds they have spent on them for birthdays, I call that a poor choice. If you are poor, you cannot afford to spend as if money is no object, not even as a special treat. My parents surely never could and never did. Even now where I have a little, we never do.

But I watched those kids do it, and my sister and brother-in-law are prone to. Heck, my husband came from a poor background and he was prone to it too for a long time and it got us into trouble more than once.

But yes, everything in life is as much about your choices as anything else. Even when things beyond your control happen, you still have to choose how to react, and that part is in your control.

originally posted by: ketsuko
Sure life deals you things beyond your control and having money helps, but it's not everything. If it were, there never would be celebrity suicides at the rates we see.

Agreed.
I am 'poor' in the sense of relative wealth compared to the average in the UK. I choose to be poor though because I am lazy and enjoy chilling out.
I worked three days last week, about 21 hours in total, it covered the bills for my little house and allows me to spend time doing free things like chilling at a mates house or just sitting at the beach listening to the waves while having a smoke.
I buy clothes from thrift/charity stores, I have a non-smart mobile phone which costs me £10 per month. I pretty much walk everywhere, don't have a TV or satelite/cable package etc, and am as happy (happier) than a mate of mine who is a cash millionaire.

He has way more things to worry about than me and has a stressed life in comparison. Yes I enjoy when we go on his speedboat or jetskiing, but I wouldn't swap lives any day soon.
I live in the UK though and it is easy being 'poor' here, universal healthcare of course makes a massive difference, as does all the other perks of keeping income below certain levels, like no council taxes (property tax).
Nope, I love being a peasant who earns enough for my needs so I can relax and not have to get out of bed early for 4 or 5 days of the week.

I've slept on the streets many years ago (for 6 months) but dragged myself out of it through making the right choices. I've also done my time working long hours, but not any more, I'm lazy and love being relatively poor compared to people who like to buy shiny things.
Shiny things don't interest me, my freetime is way more important.

originally posted by: CornishCeltGuy

originally posted by: Justso
I never read what the black buyer was angry about-so pieces here are missing.

He was initially angry because prices at the store went up. He accused them of racism for feeling threatened when he started swearing and speaking gangsta.
He shouted at them that it is how black people speak and they were racist for not accepting that.

He was a prick basically.

If I was one of those girls, I would have called the Manager immediately to handle him. I'm sure they don't get paid enough to take that s**t.

a reply to: InTheLight
One of the girls was the manager, and yes I agree they don't earn enough to take abuse like that.
My mate with me, and the other male customer there thought the same, hence our intervention.
...I don't like bullies full stop though, never have.

originally posted by: CornishCeltGuy
a reply to: InTheLight
One of the girls was the manager, and yes I agree they don't earn enough to take abuse like that.
My mate with me, and the other male customer there thought the same, hence our intervention.
...I don't like bullies full stop though, never have.

Usually Manager's have conflict resolution training and can appease most customers, obviously not in this case. Who called the police?

a reply to: InTheLight
It's a small local store, I imagine their training is minimal at best, but the best training in the world would not have worked with the guy, I was only successful because he knew I had two other men silently watching and backing me up physically.
The manager girl phoned the cops, can't blame them, the guy was scary, and using his racist accusations to justify his awful behaviour.
...I'll not lie to you, he was so nasty and challenging to relate to that at one point I actually hoped he was going to attack me so I could use reasonable force in my defence. I'm still a bloke with testosterone flowing through my veins, no matter how calmly I articulate myself to angy people.