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Retirement…Lemme tell you about it!!!!!! Not what you think!!!

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posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:03 PM
The story I am about to recant to you is true, I lived it, I watched it…and it’s more horrific than anyone could imagine.
Now, I know I’m going to be walking a fine line here, but I don’t care. My words are exactly what they say. There is no politically correct (PC) word-smithing. As always, I speak the TRUTH!!!

What you are about to read is WRONG beyond comprehension, but it’s true! Completely true!

I was a “mistake”, born 12 years after my next oldest sister. I shouldn’t be here. I was the only son. (more on this in a minute).

Dad was a Civil Engineer, a legend, in the steel industry of Detroit and Baltimore. He built “blast furnaces”, and he was fearless. I aspired to be like him.

In the 70’s the steel industry changed and Japanese steel crushed the US market. The big steel foundries in Detroit, Chicago, Indiana, Pittsburgh and Baltimore where brought to their knees. I was just a kid, but I watched a legend get crushed, and an industry collapse. I watched it.

Fast forward a few years and my family moved to Wyoming, a hard place to be sure. The energy boom reigned supreme then. We started a business and the sky was the limit for revenue, just unimaginable sums of revenue! It wasn’t uncommon to earn $250k-300k in a single day!! We drove the best trucks, and had the best gear…thousands of dollars in our pockets every Friday night, and even more for the bank on Saturday. The flow of money was both shocking and endless!

They were rough times, growing up. Many gambled and lost their money on drugs, murder and worse. We kept the money, stayed out of those games and tried to make a better life for our family.

------END PT 1-----

edit on 6/23/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:06 PM
---- PT 2 -----

In retrospect, I was just a kid then, maybe 18-19. I was rolling in money and got in over my head. We worked HARD, no cold was too cold, no weather was too ugly, no excuses... you rolled. Bigger, better, trucks, more debt; it was all okay then because the money was flowing out of a 4” hose straight into your wallet! Banks would loan you anything if you had a job then. Interest rates were crazy, but who cared? We ran rigs 24x7. ON-CALL ALAWAYS

Then the crash hit. They were capping some of the biggest gas wells on Earth (BTW…these remain capped to this day). Wells big enough to supply the entire USA with natural gas for 500 years.

Overnight all the heavy hitters left the area. Halliburton left, Tuboscope left, SMITH Tool left, Schlumberge left. They vacated millions of square feet of buildings and ground…they just left.
It was over.

Overnight an entire City of over 50,000 people went from Boom to Bust…just like that. I was there. I saw it.
I’ve written a lot of words here, but I hope some are still following; this was about retirement, right? It takes a while to get there, honestly, but I will.

So cutting a REALLY long story short, my parents went back to Michigan, a place I guess the loved. They said it was in “the middle” for all of us kids. Didn’t want to show any favorites (but I know different).
Dad said he was happy to retire after all the madness we’d lived…he seemed happy.
Then the told him…

-I’m sorry, Sir, you can’t barbeque on this property!
-I’m sorry sir, you can’t smoke your cigar on the porch, it’s offensive
-I’m sorry sir, you showed a resident a firearm…there are NO firearms allowed in this facility.
His WHOLE life he worked for this, and then he was shamed into a corner; my Father! This was his retirement….and they eventually drugged him up so much he didn’t’ even know what day it was.
Healthcare for the old…they just WANT you to DIE…it’s cheaper.

I flew into town, I came in and sat there with Dad, I sat there and held his hand as he died; I did.

That’s not what I want.

edit on 6/23/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)

edit on 6/23/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:16 PM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I hear ya, Im going with a wife much younger than me, move back out west to the less justicey areas in the mountains of Oregon. Dont touch pharmaceuticals and when the time comes head out into the woods.

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:23 PM
My condolences, sincerely. My wife and I are fortunate enough to have paid off our mortgage (mainly because we live in our $50k starter home we bought in 1985 and haven’t played the “keep up with the Jones’” game over our lifetime). Your story is exactly why my wife and I intend to die in this house, not a retirement center. We have our dogs, toys, music at our levels, etc. Our kids come visit us. We don’t have much money, but we can buy food and we are happy. I truly wish your dad (and others who have worked their whole lives) could have had/will have the same experience. I have never heard one positive thing about those retirement homes.

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:34 PM
I wish Mom could have seen all those nights when we suited up to go out across Red Desert in February for Texaco, the times every single thing froze, every single thing. The times we'd use propane torches to start trucks and backhoes, just to warm the oil up enough to get them to turn over. The times we were so tired not even a crane could drag us out of the rack, but we had to go. The times, there was no time to wash (and dry) the coveralls, and they were cold and wet (with mud), but you had to the -35F weather.

You see, in that world, there are NO complaints. You either exist, or you don't.

One of the biggest oilfield injuries is to the hand(s). You're working with so much pressure, on all fronts, it's extreme. On the rig floor, the "tongs" will gladly take a man's hand off in a millisecond. My buddy almost lost his hand (crushed) in the tongs. Safety in the oilfield business now is supreme, but it's a WAY dangerous business!!

Tough, swinging the chains around the stem, to torque it down

I just remember running out to the rigs with tens of thousands of pounds of cement and sand.

It's a different world today.

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:38 PM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I am in the process of designing my .............STAY THE FLUCK OFF MY LAWN..........sign. Not gonna play any games as I get older. Worked too hard to have some yahoos come along and ruin my retirement. Somehow I have a feeling the government is going to keep trying to tell me what is good or bad for me or how I should spend my money. I may have to draw a line.

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 07:54 PM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Thats real work, only the really tough brave kinda man s#.

I remember fellin trees in Vermont and New Hampshire a while back, so far out in the woods, no one to hear ya scream if what could...did. Wasnt just the 100 foot whites, or sprung branches 2 feet into the snow and earth...but ya never knew when ya might back into a Bull Moose.

I didnt do the work to long, was building homes in Massachusettes and picked up the side work for cash. Brutal winters.

Ive been on the continental divide in January though...damn the wind and drifting is remarkable.

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 08:37 PM
I live in the Good Ol South
Went into early retirement
Removed all clocks from the house
PC Gaming
Smoking on my front porch
Have an inground pit BBQ
A large garden

Thoroughly enjoying myself.
Bored as crap after a while....
Was glad when I got a call from my old boss asking if I would consider coming back.
Thought about it for 3 months
Retirement is not for everyone...

posted on Jun, 23 2018 @ 10:43 PM
I assume you’re speaking of Casper? I went to college there. Grew up in Douglas. My dad still lives there...drives coal trains for UP. I love going back to visit but never for more than 10 days at a time.

It is a tough place to live. The wind will drive out of staters crazy. I remember a morning with -86 degree wind wasn’t cancelled. But it is a powerful and gorgeous place to live.

Unfortunately, it’s like you said...when the boom fades and the busts kick in it turns into a sh**hole over night. Money runs out of town faster the road runner. People get laid off, out of work, furloughed or whatever other term there is to describe it and families fall apart.

It’s always great when the money is raining on everyone. Brand new trucks, hunting and fishing gear, weekend trips to Denver or deadwood, new boats on the reservoirs....everyone has everything they want. Most people spend it all. Some Are smart about it though.

My grandmother moved out to Wyoming about 10 years ago or so. She’s 94, and living in a retirement home. She’s miserable, sad, lonely, and succumbing to dementia. She is stuck in a horrible place. But they don’t want her to die...they want her to live just enough. $8,000 a month for her to be cared for. It’s not Medicare or Medicaid money either. Once her wealth is gone...then they’ll stop trying as hard. She’s a private woman; quiet and peaceful. Very much an introvert. She has no privacy, no quiet, no peace. I can’t imagine the hell she must feel everyday of her life.

Going out to see her next week. Can’t wait to give her something to smile about.

All kind of off topic, but it ties in a little.

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 02:12 AM
I, too have an unusual story about my life and family life. As a kid, I never really wanted to work for a company. I've always thought of myself as a self-starter type of "get out there and do it" person. I lack really an education after the 4th grade, but in life I live by my wits. One thing I live by is "fear". If a person has fear in the heart, a person can live a clean life.
I had fear of having to work for someone, with that fear I found courage to open up a small business in California. Then as the economy changed I started a new career in the real estate business. Realizing that giving 50% to my broker wasn't going to cut it for me, so I got my brokers license, a paid table and chair in a 90% keep commission office. Hired a secretary and was doing OK till the market bottom out.
Wife then decides to move back to her country, me with no job skills and language skills of her country ended up working for her business for the next 25 years.
Retired now, I have a scooter and go out most days to explore shines and old country roads. That's my life now.
This month I apply for Japanese pension. It's not much at all, but it is mixed in with old age care help. So if I end up in one of them places they are guarenteed so much a month from the govt. Life goes by too fast, time for another beer.

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 07:53 AM
a reply to: Assassin82

Rock Springs actually. During the late 70's and early 80's Rock Springs and Casper were on nearly identical trajectories, practically sister cities. In fact, I can remember mornings where you'd wake up, have breakfast (at 3am) and have to walk out to the truck to figure out if you were in Casper or Rock Springs. That's how much time we spent traveling between the two cities. You couldn't tell just by looking at license plates either. At any given time there were just as many plates with 4's as there were with 1's in any lot in either City. (something I always loved about Wyoming, that you could tell where people were from by their license plates).

Cheyenne seemed like a different country. And Denver seemed like a completely different planet! LOL! But it really did.

It's funny, here in CO all the energy companies have Texas plates, but in Wyoming back in the day, no matter what happened, no matter how insanely crazy things got you never saw any other plates but Wyoming plates. It was like this self-contained world. I always laugh at the television ads where they say "What happens in Vegas...stays in Vegas" because while that may be true, it was DEFINITELY the case in Wyoming during those years. What happened in Wyoming, not only stayed in Wyoming, but was also dealt with by Wyoming. Always.

It was a tough life, but it made a person strong, and resourceful. These are things I rely on every day of my adult life. The lessons learned during those years are immeasurable.

Heh, I remember walking into the "mall" in Rock Springs once. They had a small car show going on inside. One of the exhibits was from Motorola (and this story might even be worth a post of it's own) was the very first "cellular phone". I can remember the guy from Motorola explaining how 'cellular' technology worked, and thinking to myself that it would be decades before that ever caught on in Wyoming. And I was right. I remember the Motorola guy saying how spectacular it would be, people could actually make a phone call from their very own car!

I told the Motorola guy we'd been making phone calls from our trucks for years already, this was nothing new. (kinda' rained on his parade I guess). And I can honestly remember thinking, the greatest thing about this revolutionary new "cellular" technology was...I might finally be able to eat my breakfast at the cafe in peace at 3am, without truck horns honking in the parking lot every two minutes!! And, you might ask yourself what the heck that means, right?

You see, back then we used radio-telephones in our trucks. When someone called you the radio telephone dispatcher sent a tone, specific to your truck's radio. When the tone was received by your radio it was wired to the horn of the truck, so the horn would honk just like a phone ringing, over and over until someone answered it (which meant going out to your truck to do so). I can remember sitting in the diner eating breakfast and there being what seemed like an ocean of honking truck horns in the parking lot, so many sometimes nobody could tell who's phone it was, and 20 guys would run out to the parking lot to see if it was them. (They fixed this problem later by also hooking up the parking lights to the same system, then the horn would honk but the parking lights would flash too, so you could visually see who's truck it was that was receiving the call. At least we could finish our eggs and hashbrowns then without running outside at -35F below zero every two minutes!).

It was a slice of life so crazy that most cannot even imagine what it was like. A world so foreign to most that it might just as well have been another planet. A world where "revolutionary" new technology like a cellular telephones really just meant being able to eat your breakfast (or dinner) in peace for once.

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 09:08 AM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I never knew Rock Springs population got that high. It doesn’t surprise me though, the Highway 59 corridor between Douglas and Gillette can explode in population during an oil boom. Casper too; when it’s booming, it starts to look like a mini Denver. When it’s busting, it looks like a meth heads paradise.

I always tell people a couple things about Wyoming. 1, it’s like going back in time. Literally....they are always far behind and most of the locals refuse to progress. Which is pretty cool in its own way. 2, visit, but don’t stay. The isolation and seclusion of the state makes it uniquely beautiful. You will struggle to handle the harsh winters and the locals typically aren’t sympathetic to your tears of pain. It’s old fashioned, people still rely on hunting and fishing to survive. They don’t want all the modern day luxuries. Casper fought tooth and nail to keep their first Walmart out back in the 90’s.

My dad is a year and a half from retirement. He’s the type that has to always be doing something. I don’t think retirement will do him well at all. He’s a bit of a recluse, an isolationist, and an introvert like my grandmother. Wyoming would do him well I’m the sense that he wouldn’t be consumed and disrespected by the public. But it would be at the sacrifice of quality health care and warm winters.

Like you said, it’s a tough and harsh place to live. I will always be grateful for the lessons Wyoming taught me.

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 09:33 AM
a reply to: Assassin82

I consider Wyoming "home". Even though I wasn't born there, I lived most of my life there and consider myself a native as a result.

I always tell people a couple things about Wyoming. 1, it’s like going back in time. Literally....they are always far behind and most of the locals refuse to progress. Which is pretty cool in its own way. 2, visit, but don’t stay. The isolation and seclusion of the state makes it uniquely beautiful. You will struggle to handle the harsh winters and the locals typically aren’t sympathetic to your tears of pain. It’s old fashioned, people still rely on hunting and fishing to survive. They don’t want all the modern day luxuries. Casper fought tooth and nail to keep their first Walmart out back in the 90’s.

Heh, well what I always said was...the single greatest favor anyone ever did for Wyoming was to build Interstate 80 across the southern part of the state. People drive across 80 and say to themselves it's a god forsaken wasteland and that's just perfect...just so long as they keep on going! LOL!! If they only knew what lay just 20 miles north (or south)...but just keep on going!! That's just how I like it.

Yellowstone is nice, but if I never set foot there again it would probably be a day too soon! Same thing for Jackson Hole; used to be a pretty fun town back in the day, but all the out of staters just wrecked that place! Pinedale used to be nice too, but now it's like a metropolis. Wrecked that too. Now they say the "billionaires pushed all the millionaires out of Jackson, so all the millionaires moved to Pinedale". It's sad, those places used to have so much character back when they were "real". The Mormons have screwed up South Pass (badly), up to and including changing the name of state and national monuments to meet with their religious preachings. Some of the progress has not been kind to Wyoming at all. It's no wonder people from Wyoming resist change. I love Wyoming for just that! In fact, that is probably the essence of why it is "home" to me and always will be.

But if you know Wyoming, there are still places left. Places too difficult to get to for the candyasses, places their air conditioned Lincoln Navigators won't take them, and that's just fine. Keep out!

ETA...My lifelong goal was to be retired and look out in the driveway and see a '23' on my license plate. To me that defined having done everything right in life. I knew, even back then, I didn't want a 22 on my license plate. I could no longer identify with those (new) people. They brought Kalifornia to Wyoming, and wanted to make it Kalifornia. Unfortunately, in my early 50's I had to even rethink the '23' on my license plate. Oh well, times change I guess.
edit on 6/24/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 10:04 AM
a reply to: Assassin82

I never knew Rock Springs population got that high.

I know, crazy huh? I can remember even in HS chuckling at the signs at the edge of town which had Rock Spring's population listed at 29,000. There were nearly twice that number of homes alone then, not to mention every trailer park, every hotel room and practically every flat spot had someone living in it. Couldn't build hotels fast enough. Better have a reservation (a long, long, time in advance too) or you damn sure weren't staying in Rock Springs...or Green River or anywhere else in Sweetwater County. Little America either. Even Evanston was sold out in those days...and Evanston SUCKS!

As a matter of fact, they built a whole town out in Red Desert, a whole freaking town! There must have been about 200-300 homes out there. I think it was even called that 'Red Desert'. Most of the homes are all gone now, but the building pads are all still there. I think it became the meth capital of the universe so they bulldozed most of it. Man, I spent a whole lot of time out in that area. I probably know every road for 250 miles (or more) in every direction out there! Everything from there north up to just south of the Wind Rivers and south all the way to northern Colorado and Utah. Texaco had stuff everywhere in that region. I'll bet I put over a million miles on in that area...all of it off the pavement.

That has GOT to be the coldest place on planet Earth, Red Desert. I remember one job out south of Red Desert where the temp never got above minus -37F for two weeks straight (standing temperature, not including wind chill). We were outside in that stuff the entire time, all day, all night. The wind was whippin' about 60mph the whole time. Wind chill must have been -100F or more. Just crazy cold. It was brutal. Just mind numbingly brutal! And you know what, I never thought anything of it back then; it was just another day. I look back on that now and wonder how I even survived it at all, let alone worked and flourished in that stuff.
edit on 6/24/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 10:24 AM
Before my neck surgery I worked for a commercial and residential moving company. I loved that job, New location and new shippers every job. And we traveled up and down the east coast Maine to Florida..

Having said that every morning I would look at the paper work and pray the destination was not a retirement home..

It was so depressing, watching people who in some cases had built there own house, say goodbye to the majority of their possessions and the only place they feel safe, to be shipped off to one of those "forgotten facilities".

We would do what we could to soften the heartbreak during the course of the move. Sometimes it helps just to not be impatient (we got paid by the job not the hour, so this was more of a sacrifice then you would think)and let them tell the story of every piece of furniture or momento.

Give them a chance to smile as they remember before it disappeared forever into the back of the truck headed to storage..

I will never put my parents in a "forgotten facility" .



posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 10:44 AM
a reply to: Mike Stivic

And you know, the hell of it was the place where my parents moved into was a really (REALLY) nice facility. Cost over a million bucks to get into this place. It had it all...or so it seemed. Independent living, assisted living and nursing care living. It was the whole deal. Stay forever. I guess I should have paid more attention to the ever present dark purple storm clouds with lightning bolts coming out of them all the time directly overhead at their place. Like the freaking Hotel can check-out anytime you like, but you can NEVER leave!

But seriously though, one time Dad freaked out and just went off. Totally out of character for him. He was raving about the place being a "prison" and them all being "inmates" and so forth. Just out of the blue one night. It was absolutely STUNNING how fast they had him drugged into oblivion!! Nope, can't have ANY of that!! Can't tolerate ONE SECOND of that kind of talk!!! The rest of the "inmates" might wise up and revolt on our little faux utopian empire.

ETA...This place was my parents choice. They WANTED to move there! None of us kids wanted them to at all!! We tried for two years to talk them out of it. They were absolutely unwilling to do anything different, just bent on it.

edit on 6/24/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 11:12 AM
a reply to: Mike Stivic

BTW...I genuinely applaud your efforts to soften the blow of moving folks out of their "homes" into a facility like this. It is an devastating time in their lives. Not only are they surrendering many of their possessions, but more importantly they are surrendering their independence...and they know it! It is truly tragic! Their whole lives they worked for are suddenly reduced to watching reruns of Judge Judy and sitting on a couch.

What you may perceive as a tiny bit of kindness with your gestures is actually worth solid gold to them!! And I salute you for that effort!

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 11:24 AM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I’m in the same boat. We moved from Southern California to Wyoming when I was 7 or 8. Interestingly, my dad owned a full service Texaco gas station in Santa Paula, CA prior to getting fed up with California and moving to Wyoming. He was ahead of the game and moved before everyone else did. And he moved us there because Wyoming was more beholden to his values and way of life. He got right in. It took me some getting used to, but it has always been my “home” as well.

posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 12:49 PM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

When you walk on to a job like that and see the emotional pain and turmoil that these people are dealing with, it to me is just common decency to treat them with the respect and dignity they deserve.

All I had to say to myself at the time (15 years ago) is ;

"What if this was my grandmother? How would I want her to be treated ?"

After most jobs we would jaam to the radio and crack jokes in the cab sometimes three or four of us on the way back to the hotel or the shop.

After these types of moves,it seemed to effect all of us the same way..We would sit quietly and somber in a contemplative state. Almost like we just left a wake or a funeral..

It was that bad.

I have a lot to say about this topic and the "retirement home"industry/scam and a few insane stories, I just don't have the time atm to type them out.

I'll try to write up some later this evening.

Good thread bro, something a lot of people don't think about.


posted on Jun, 24 2018 @ 12:59 PM
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Man, that was both beautiful and sad at the same time. I was also a mistake being 10 years behind my next sibling. Weird enough, we were even stationed at Cheyenne for a bit before retirement.

I think my dad was happiest while he was working, even with all of the drama of being in the FAA. He retired and got really depressed, finding a temp driving job for another 10 years until the energy just wasn't there anymore. It has been sad watching the decline. I don't know if I am really excited about retirement anymore after watching the results. A person adapts their reality so much to allow the existence of a 40 hour work week or more. I think it is hard to redefine reality afterwards.

But there is one thing I hope I never have to do, put them into a retirement home. I drive out to their house at least once a week to help with yard work and cleaning the house. I have several friends that I would ask to house sit for me if I needed to move in with them for further care just to make it so they will not be subjected to a depressing environment in their final hours. They gave me life. They cared for me to the best of their abilities. I will forever be in their debt and I hope I have the chance to repay a mere fraction of the love they gave me over the years.

Thank you for this thread.

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