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My Spiritual awakening to li[f]e its lessons and the path

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posted on Jan, 19 2018 @ 08:58 AM
Hey everyone hope people are feeling well today/tonight this is about my spiritual path of awakening I'd like to talk about. I mean no offence to anyone at all, I post with postivive intentions only and to get things off my chest also and that is all.

I had a good think on where to put this thread in as it may have afew conspiracy aspects to it yet its my life i hold meaning to it in a spiritual way still and most can't be proven yet anyways so I could only think of this one.

I must warn it may be long. But only with respect with no intrest in bickering and nonsense and I strongly stress guys and girls I do have an understanding and I done a lot and I mean a lot of research in nearly all areas to help me with a conclusion you could also say little experiments too to bring closure to myself and give light to the real truth of the life we live and what we go through that no one was willing to tell me and even went as far as covering it all up. But that's OK life is life I understand why.

I need to get this off my chest and out to the ones who are also in my position but in the early stages.. I woke up to the denial and bias sytems produced to keep us asleep and distracted for easy access to our minds for control through trauma, oppression and suppression by society stereotypical social grouping through conditioning to certain stimuli and triggers.

I'm sorry but no matter the label, facility, institution or even "program"...wether its hip hop , democracy hyprocasy, even basketball all have politics on the inside..why? It means that one thing "control" +"obey" + "problems" + "smoke screen" = $$$ then the consumer is the "mind" just like maths, we're taught that sticks us in this matrixed reality to forget our true reason of life, begs the real answer to the question of what's the root of all evil of the Money coined true to the dollar?? The damn people who created it and the people who are apart of the hypnosis of the false sense of the creation of value which also distorts the perception of yet another flase sense of security made from nothing... I mean nothing plaatic from sourced from earth, Yet people will kill, fornicate, deceive, steal for it and over it and break friendships due to the big unforseen hypnotic tool that it is and the belief its all we have. Morals lost control gained..

So then why not dispose of that evil tool? Well if you reverse tool its loot, loot the very lives of our spirit our soul." Regardless how I say it its all been said before yet I will again in my way of understanding.
Full of tricks and deceit, 1+1 = window ans to what you must ask? To opportunity, just as much as it gives value to the equality of 2 in a real mathematical not just a logical run metephor pun.. Put 2 and 2 together its mind control which to my understanding of the termonology with the use of metaphorical speech through typing ques of explanation regarless the wording or the context its pretty much the same.. just lik 2 + 2 is 4, 4 let's speak symbology to me 4 edges to 3d with that on top you go into 3rd dimension of a box which gives it our reality. Life's a paradox They box us in our mind "brainwash"... We are our own Pandoras box open it.. You don't need authority to dictate your own solitary mind and spiritual awareness and life's pathways.

Wre I'm getting at is everything's the same just labeled diferrent in reltaion to whatever context it is put in or aspect its related to, to blame another or sidetrack to forget the real problem and ofcourse the forced dumbing down of our minds. Just as how I am explaining my opinion on the reason why our world is how screwed and messed up it is today. Schooling its a lesson there right there from the start of highschool and I mean not the one we were taught during class. Words are spell casting, maths are problems , electricity well you get the picture.

We are metaphors to maths creating multypling more problems for ourselves some intentional some unintentional like breeding kids knowing kids are our future yet poising them with shots , as school certainly showed but not openly teach us, with no subtracting of it nor solvng any formula just produce more problems in society hiding the solutions.. Opening un needed tech in this reality to stop our advancing minds through AI and other useless means for our minds.
I had to get all that out first because its neccesary to begin what I need to speak about to create an understanding to why I'm here in the first place telling this story.

Word of warning i may sound quite coherent in parts and a little off and lazy in others seeming illiterate because I have such passion in some areas and ill feelings on others also my mind zips like a v12 engine in drag strip then it can also be a drag along and it shows whether I verbally speak or type it comes out as is, the way I articulate my processing of info will all that of the way, I will try keep this one short but with in the bounderies of what I explained previsouly it is all connected and interconected.

I will be vague in some parts for personal reasons and this may come in a second post as well in the comments. This is what I call a spiritual path I went through since childhood my awakening started in my teens.

Ever since childhood I had interests in the sky, galaxies, to be a scientist and paranormal to find truth in life and help others due to my experiences. I always thought outside the box. I was always different, people knew I didnt know yet at the time I didn't know why but I think I do now.
I never really had friends I kept just the odd 2 or 3 I remember once but I liked being alone for the time being of primary with my sister who helped me through she was like the one who always reminded me of what mum told to do because my mind was off else where in another world and I really appreciate her for that she was like my protector in this world to ground me when I'd float too high up. (I have grown to not hold memories for belief reasons but that I hold close)

My imagination I rememeber was vivid, I grew up taking everything apart i never had toys because id break them or id get a screw driver and pull them apart so my mum stopped buying them, I was an outside kid anyways. I terrorised my siblings friends running at them being full of energy non stop wanting to play and wrestle and what not jump of dressers and climb roofs.

I was hyperactive yet tests showed I was normal as the doctors said besides severed asthma. I'd do well planned traps to my brothers mates for some odd reason like little booby traps somehow id know they're coming and do them up how i knew again i do not know i just created them and wait like a child would in suspense to see my master plan work and get a kick out of it. Yet I didn't see myself as a bad child just very hyper active but also very closed off and shy if interacted with personally. I loved climbing and adventuring especially trees and seeing things people didn't and feeling. I also remember never really getting sick i mean very rare back then or being able to catch a virus off people, even now I get sick rarely. (All this will refer to what I explain later on as it comes in place like a puzzle). I had a lady I recall come asking my questions but then I wouldn't I won't say my age but I was still very young but only a year ago I questioned it but not till afew months ago I pondered

posted on Jan, 19 2018 @ 08:59 AM
Continuing post.

posted on Jan, 19 2018 @ 10:30 AM
I pondered as to why she was there yet I didn't see her because I didn't need to I geuss but I do remember a lot seeing myself in third person at times like obe. She asked my mum various questions about me. I was to busy digging holes and playing with my dads gardens and eating his carrots to worry about some random lady at that age.

It was after that a year I was sexually abused a fair few times ( location I wish not to disclose) I say this not for empathy but I have afew theory's that I well state later on and also for raising of awareness. Not only me but my sister as well. We were a church family I never told my mum because I didn't want her to hate herself for that or blame as she seemed to be a victim herself in her younger years before meeting our father.

We were also abused violently and i can not say it emotionally effects me at all but it does to a degree knowing what my sister went through it tears a hole and she still doesn't understand to this day my feelings and remembrance of those times but for some reason I've never admitted to her yet she has hinted at it the vilonet times.. ( we don't speak anymore). I hold no hatred or any negative feelings to the people that were involved as I understand why also yet it does not give acceptance to it happening and the continuation of it and the power for it by the government and the authorities behind it who allow and protect it.

My sister was badly affected and I felt it but I didn't express it at the time and ofcourse she couldnt how could a child comorehend such traumatic exoerience at that age it would cause a disassociation of the mind and persona and in all honesty if i witnessed it at the age of my awkening with not learning my mistakes and humbleness i would be on murder charges by now. At this time do not think or act on negative or violent emotions. But I know the damages it can and does do to a family affected and the perception it can distort visually around you and distrust. ( I started to think it was a cult as my mum constantly dislikes the people I'm the town and many other things but has no memory of other stuff yet things link up as so called "possessions" but from now I thik they were assaults to condition her into a detachment of a certain memory of her to insert another persona of my mother in her and say its a "ghost" possessed her but I beleive its her alter ego as a form of mind control. I never seen till I got older)

So come primary we were picked on I'd look out for my sister like she would for me and we would literally have to defend ourselves with no exaggeration for some absurd reason hordes of children charging at us in a circle at random to attack us I never turned violent just protect no fists. It was actually quite a racist school but again I have undertanding due to the systems control and systematic abuse and brainwashing so I hold no Ill feelings.

Fast forward and highschool same thing first day I'd get picked fought a person who was 4 years older my year and the bullying continued for me and my sister she transitioned well. I didnd I only held 2 friends but I respected and enjoyed there company not even the so called nerds I befriended they didn't really like me, I was instantly put into an Im class I aksed them why they said cos your special yet my intellect was not below average then they blamed my behaviour yet I was quiet. I excelled in science and sport as well as all other subjects besides geography they took me out of it and stuck with me a teachers aid which I felt no need for that and deffinalty didn't use it to my advantage besides geography for one exam I must admit more so I wasnt interested and felt like a chore.

Now another thing, I know it seems all negative but its got to do with the bigger picture not that I seen my childhood as bad as I never dwelled over it i had my ups and downs yet i keep high spirits mentally you go through bad and the good its what you take out from the lesson as every day is a lesson to learn and forgiveness internally you forgive and be compassionate externally.
I healed and besides all that my family were once a happy family we did family things.

I went through the stage of drug use at 17 which was odd for everyone as I was an athlete and very fit no alcohol no smoking and had "phsycotic" episodes I found spirituality as a way of dealing with things. Beleive me I've seen things I, even you shouldn't have but I did yet physics can't explain neither modern day science will bother with a simple explanation, I've seen UFOs at a young age, paranormal experiences, near death experiences numerous times, I have had obe, I lucid dream.

Now I hit drugs very hard later on and that's when I started to take it out on my family and they kind of kicked me out in fear which I totally understand but not at the time of my drug abuse. But the thing was I ended learning most was manipulated yes I did wrong I smashed my room I out them in fear but strings were pulled trauma being used as a trigger by whom I can't disclose that.

I always have learnt from my mistakes as I did have faith god I still do but not in the god sense most is normally taken. So side to my small stint in taking insane amounts of drugs and cocktailing, I always had an open mind of things things that didn't seem right. I taught my mind a lot of things mainly to handle my anger management due to the thoughts I got I won't fully elaborate but to the point like meditation a solitude in my mind no thoughts no thinking just feeling like I felt I was meditwtiom on the go as I didn't like to sit for long for personal reasons and there is no wrong or right way of meditation as long as there's concentration silence and intent to your peace of mind.

That's where I learnt a lot but people didn't like that, they didn't like my silence well I was always silent but not that silent, I seen no need to poison my mind with all that nonsense. As it was my trigger I'd get extremely violent if I listen to rap or be very deviant if I watched phsycotic movies. Because they were my triggers I was conditioned to violence and acting out in an abnormal way for some of my teenage years and I got sick of being violent due to my past and traumatising people by my actions and yelling abuse for no reason fighting people for picking on lonely people, attacking someone because they said something to me. I awakened when I realised I'm not saying every situation was a "bait tactic" but some looking back were very suspicious coming to think of it when I woke up from the nightmare of life.
People push people do do violent things its all violence and my question is why? The ones who are pushing it are the non traumatised ones the ones who had no trouble nothing. Life and people has changed these years by MSM and now drugs. I have since quit drugs as I dont I even quit smoking..

I was lead on a false spiritual awakening to realise they were trying to put me back to sleep again yet I was defiant I didn't want to I wanted more then a drug life, don't get me wrong I did drugs but I still dress well and kept clean. I done drugs for the spiritual side of things to open my subconcioues and see what made tick and I worked it out. Yet I was so oblivious to the people around me trying to stop me due to , jelousy, spite, or they were told to.. I fight with love and love lights the way for the path of faith to my way of enlightenment.

posted on Jan, 19 2018 @ 11:11 AM
a reply to: Translucentalitheia

I won't speculate on what I went through as I'm sure most of the hardcore conpisirists and truthers will have an idea what afew of these things are. But as I explain its all summaries but in the near future I will put up threads of one of them or two with sources to back them up.

As I was in the stage of drugs use I was with those people and the things we got up to were what normal people would do I geuss that smoked and did drugs. But the conversations were different it was just the usual making deals and talking smack but I liked to talk real, not in the way of street real more real as in not stuck to any bias crap or ideology products of the governing bodies of society and street talk.
This could well be a conspiracy as some jokingly said to me that I shrugged off as a joke... The conversations I had were not the normal type you would have in a group chat it was speaking of the world and lies in it and deception with society and the government well I thought I was schizophrenic and they sure made sure I believed it but I held skeptical as I felt like the whole town was under experimentation or some kind of oppression as I felt same but only if I spoke about those touchy subjects literally different cars would appear mobs of it and just be there which to me to me is very abnormal. I ended up in p
The phsyc ward half delusional being ignorant to what I'm saying yet not taking in fully nor seriously it was more theorising really, but I had my suspicions. I know I'm being vague but I'm wary as to whether I should speak about any more now as its abit serious you know this part.

I'll try give certain details like I did lose time in there as they were aware I had an awakening as people who wake up so suddenly and it isnt the awakening you are lead to beleive as my theory is the awakening is actually the false awakening of conciousness which in turn they put you back to sleep again and you forget ( i will if i can do threwd on this one but i dont see a point as its right in front us) in the dream fantasy world to the real awakening you tend to not trust anyone I mean nobody when you see the real world that it is and what it hides and they know I know and for the ones who protect it know it I seen in there eyes that they could see what my eyes seen and realiesed. All I though I was doing was helping people wake up but It was to the wrong people to be exact.

Don't get me wrong some people need to be in that trance to protect whatever needs protecting but for others I think its wrong. what I say is touchy as it dissoactied my mind and reality due to it and it makes me quite angry people knowingly know that yet still do it including the professionals. But it got weird I was able to bring in stuff I shouldn't and use it then play around and test out mind type things. Then I'd get baited unknowingly and attempt at triggers with more drugging of me and compromisation of my mind lost days of time. I understand why some do that but to a human being let alone animals but a human to human is wrong. My body malfunctioned like a shutsown in a way I couldn't hold the right posture and they laugh and say its okay and I say no its not I can't speak properly and I don't feel right. Im very sure it was a reaction to too much given to me of the vaccine they used to put me out they had used 4 or 5 then to counter ract they gave me meds so I could come too which I took but the rest I never anything they said "its a new meds you have to take' I never swallowed but my window ones I did just to help with the transition but I stopped it because your more suggestible when your drugged up your mind is like a zombie, I do not like that.
After a while I'm back out again I'll cut this one short but after afew more events that I will create in another thread soon as its one main topic I ended up stumbling on a surveillance house with cameras faced to houses and I puck d up on it because I over heard signals I like to call that weren't what you would call people just mowing lawns and beeping that is just " beeping" it was in synchronisation and that is when I spoke out and things just weren't what it seemed like I first thought.. I decided to scope them out as I knew they were watching me, I caught them or rather I thought I did but they flashed a police badge yet they were just 6 doors across the street as a buissness couple mowing lawns. I won't go into detail in the he protocol and interchange cos it may get me into trouble because beleive me they weren't cops neither when I think about it they flashed the badge on purpose to throw me ofcourse.. I will do another thread on it as it had to to with the houses I was in and the odd happenings inside them with my sptitual "awakening"

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