Wild Turkey...(s)

And now for something completely different...

A herd of wild turkeys terrorize mail-persons in Ohio town. (or is it a 'flock', or a 'gaggle', a 'pack', maybe a 'gang'...or even a 'murder'...oh, it's a 'brood').

ROCKY RIVER, Ohio -- A brood of aggressive wild turkeys have interfered with mail carriers' abilities to deliver mail to homes in a portion of the city.

Turkeys Gone Wild!

I guess I'm left with the question...if the residents aren't being terrorized by the turkeys then why are the mail-persons being targeted?? I mean, turkeys are pretty smart, but ummmm c'mon guys, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't know a mail-person from John Q. Resident!

And what the heck ever happened to the mantra... "Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom...nor meanie-assed wild turkeys...stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds????"

Perhaps the article should have been entitled..."Really???? WTF, over?"

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

They figured out the whole Thanksgiving situation.

Here in Michigan we have a lot of them everywhere. I live in a pretty busy area on Lake Michigan and we have them a couple of times a week. The only thing I can figure is the uniform you know turkeys will be turkeys!!



Watch this when the sun comes up 20-30 at a time
Snowman Cam

originally posted by: roadgravel
They figured out the whole Thanksgiving situation.

And now it's....WAR!!!

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Funny cause 10 miles away in Cleveland it's an aggressive dog issue.
People are putting out good and that's why they are hanging around.

I have three turkeys here that we raised this year. They're very large birds and are quite territorial. I've seen them send an ambitious skunk running for the hills. My chickens have realized that they now have more than just a dog to protect them, and are roaming around the place with the turkeys. Turkeys have a beak and know how to use it.

But they're still turkeys. They're food. I don't run from food; I eat food.

I call stories like this the "wussification of America." A human is much larger than any turkey. All anyone has to do to remove a turkey from their immediate vicinity is to make a sudden move toward them and raise their arms. The turkeys will retreat to a safe distance, and if they are not encroached upon, will not approach the human again. I have discovered that turkeys are not as dumb as I had been led to believe, and are very curious critters. If there is something new in their environment, they will check it out. The mailmen were new to the turkeys; the turkeys were probably checking them out. The ones who got pecked were probably trying to retreat and the turkeys saw that as a reason to run them off.

Now, if you want to talk mean birds... I'd much rather scare off a few turkeys than deal with geese. Those critters are mean!

TheRedneck

I have a few Bourbon Reds and have been attacked by a massive Tom....it hurt!!!!

They're really strong birds.

If I was a mailgirl I'd prefer to get chased down the street by a dog

When I was five or six years old every time I went to the barn the male Turkey wanted to flog and fight me.. He was as tall as me and at that time a whole lot meaner... I was in fear when I went to the barn to feed the animals and even carried a bat which the Turkey had no fear of in my hands..

Thanksgiving came along and dad offered me a knife (a German bayonet from the war) to cut his damn head off. His neck was strategically stretched over a log and I took a mighty swing with all my strength to sever his head from his body. The knife bounced off his scroungy neck and didn't even leave a mark (German Bayonets were not sharpened).. Second swing and dad had enough. He did the twist his head off routine we used on chickens before dinner.

People may scoff or think "Oh how Cruel" but to this day I wish I could have swung harder.. Vengeance would have been better than that tough old bird we had for Thanksgiving all those years ago.

Good news was I got to keep the Bayonet and it went with me every where on the farm after that.. BB gun, then shot gun, then .22, Bayonet, Dog and a horse.. What more could a kid ask for.. ?

I read the title quickly ... And
Thought this thread was about bottles of whiskey !!

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

A rafter of wild turkeys ?

Good to see the turkeys standing up for their rights , sad that the US mail persons don't know how to use a stick.

Some carriers have been pecked, but have not been hurt, Van Allen said.

Aggressive wild turkeys

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

"Brood" ?



I always called it "How the hell did I get here"

Also sometimes known as "coyote arm".

[ nobody laugh...you know you've been there too ]

and this has been going on for 3 weeks
So it begins...

a reply to: TheRedneck

See, and that's just it too; we raise chickens and geese (in addition to the cattle). I know some folks who have turkeys and they don't seem to be all that big of a deal. I'd be far more worried about a pissed off cock rooster on the warpath than I ever would be a turkey. Those bad boys can inflict some serious damage now!

Funny story about a rooster we had once (I usually cull 'em...ALL). I was in the garage one day and this rooster came walking in. Some of his wimmin's were happily walking around checking things out. He copped an attitude real quick and decided to attack. One of the dogs had a run in with him previously and got bloodied up pretty good (lucky she didn't lose an eye), so he was on parole anyway. Only reason we even kept the bastage was because he was cool lookin'.

Anyway, out of the corner of my eye I see this rooster puff up and make a B-line right for me. Like you, I don't run from food! Only thing I had nearby was a shovel, so I grabbed it and teed off on his stupid ass right as he got to me! (BONG..ng..ng..ng) If he would have been a golf ball it would have been a 350 yard shot! He goes skidding across the garage and under the four wheeler. I figured I killed him for sure, which was totally fine by me! He was out like a light under the four wheeler. I walked over and grabbed the traffic cone we use to bleed 'em out and got out my knife. About the same time that damn rooster came to, and jumped up. He jumped up so hard he whacked his head on the skid-plate of the four wheeler...and right back down he went! I laughed so hard I almost hurt myself.

At work the next day some colleagues asked about the daily update on the mad rooster. "Well, he's in the fridge over there...for lunch! Chicken noodle soup. Should be enough for everyone." Some of the best chicken noodle soup I've ever made!!

True story too.

a reply to: Meldionne1

Well, that was kind of the idea.

a reply to: DAVID64

LOLOLOLOL!!!

Yep!

originally posted by: TinySickTears
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Funny cause 10 miles away in Cleveland it's an aggressive dog issue.
People are putting out good and that's why they are hanging around.

I'm not seeing any wayward fowl nor on the loose mad pooches.

I'm not putting out either, and I refuse to. The pooches are not up to scratch.

originally posted by: DAVID64
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

"Brood" ?

I always called it "How the hell did I get here"

Also sometimes known as "coyote arm".

[ nobody laugh...you know you've been there too ]

I've been there, being attacked by Wild Turkey. I got drunk on it onetime and got scraped up from falling on the gravel when fooling around with a friend, probably stuffing ice down someone's shirt or something then getting chased. That was probably forty years ago.

Wild Turkey is dangerous as hell.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

1 3.5 inch 12.g turkey magnum
1 smoker
1 small pile of apple wood, some green for best smoke
3-4 friends

quick work of aforementioned turkeys

The brown turkeys are fighting back for their oppressed white domestic cousins.