It has happened. The unthinkable. The nightmare has begun.

originally posted by: Skid Mark
From farting?

The holes, yes. The ass crater? That was just from sitting.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus
At least there are no stains and scorch marks from the farts.

a reply to: zazzafrazz

Yeah lol.

***shhhhhhhh... Bigburgh walks into thread quietly***

Well I guess no-one is looking at this Thread anymore...



If I was DB..

**Bigburgh leaves thread**...

a reply to: DBCowboy

I'd tell you it didn't taste as good as it looks but I'd be lying.

I had a plain toasted bagel with a thin smear of cream cheese with cucumber and onion for lunch.

a reply to: DBCowboy

I hope it was fat free cream cheese for less flavor.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: butcherguy

Chicken, brown rice, steamed vegetables, no butter, and something called yo-gert. I have no idea what that alien dish is.

What kind of steak is a "yo-gert"?

Plus, I have to give up sodas and no booze.

No booze.

Why she doesn't just ask me to stop breathing is beyond me.

whats the fun in quickly killing you when she can keep you alive only to torture you for the rest of your life.

a reply to: DBCowboy

Props..
No we may never have Sara Jean Underwood as a wife. Or look as handsome as Cliff Howard.
But you are willing to sacrafice a bit for someone that loves you very much.



Obligatory SJU photo..


**** portions..

Make it look back at you......That's it!****

a reply to: TobyFlenderson

Fried slaw...hahah
www.youtube.com...

originally posted by: DBCowboy
I had a plain toasted bagel with a thin smear of cream cheese with cucumber and onion for lunch.

How long did that keep you feeling full? There are certain types of foods called hydrophilic foods that keep you feeling full for a very long time, so you can eat less calories, but cheat by having an alcoholic drink now and again. I make a yellow split pea and chickpea soup that, I swear, keeps me full for over 6 hours, then I can have that low calorie beer (or three) later on. Good luck, I hope it works out for you.

www.mindbodygreen.com...

well if she is considering you fat then just try her methods

DB,how are you doing on your diet? Have you lost any weight yet?
Also,have you cheated much or have you been a good boy? Serious
minds want to know these answers.Bye...

a reply to: Bigburgh

You are a very bad influence on poor old DB while he is
struggling to lose weight,shame on you!

originally posted by: mamabeth
DB,how are you doing on your diet? Have you lost any weight yet?
Also,have you cheated much or have you been a good boy? Serious
minds want to know these answers.Bye...

I am a rail-thin waif. A skinny little flower adrift in the winds.

I think I've lost a pound.

a reply to: DBCowboy

Time to break out your skinny jeans.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
a reply to: DBCowboy

Time to break out your skinny jeans.

I accidently ate them.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
a
Time to break out your skinny jeans.

Are those the ones with the draw string closure?

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: IAMTAT
a
Time to break out your skinny jeans.

Are those the ones with the draw string closure?

Yes.
He used those as dental floss after he ate them.

a reply to: IAMTAT

I'm kinda disappointed about the weight loss, I wanted him to sit on my iPhone and turn it into an iPad.