Seriously Funny

originally posted by: lostgirl

originally posted by: Nothin

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Who or what is being made fun of?

Are you kidding me?!?

Those jokes are sooooo offensive to poultry!!!

That kind of humor represents fowlism at it's very worst!!!


Man! I bet you're one of those fowlists that trots out the turkey jokes every November too!!

Depends if you're a stool-pigeon, or not.

Do you not enjoy turkey-trots?

a reply to: lostgirl

So you're for or against free range?

originally posted by: Nothin
Why did the chicken cross the road?

Who or what is being made fun of?

Your first line is a random question with no prior reference, it is not considered a joke.

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you are referring to the class of jokes that begin with "why did the chicken cross the road?"

If you are, then here is my answer: why are you referencing a chicken that did not give you permission to discuss it for the purpose of humour? Did the chicken in question give you prior consent to do so?

(I don't personally find it offensive, do you? Well it doesn't matter because we are not certain whether the chicken finds it offensive. Therefore, just to be on the safe side, we'd best not joke about them.)

originally posted by: Dark Ghost

originally posted by: Nothin
Why did the chicken cross the road?

Who or what is being made fun of?

Your first line is a random question with no prior reference, it is not considered a joke.

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you are referring to the class of jokes that begin with "why did the chicken cross the road?"

If you are, then here is my answer: why are you referencing a chicken that did not give you permission to discuss it for the purpose of humour? Did the chicken in question give you prior consent to do so?

(I don't personally find it offensive, do you? Well it doesn't matter because we are not certain whether the chicken finds it offensive. Therefore, just to be on the safe side, we'd best not joke about them.)

Why are you assuming that the chicken did not give permission? Perhaps it did...
Are chickens capable of giving permission? Do they have a sense of humour?
Are they capable of being offended?
Do chicken have teeth?

Did you hear the one about the... NVM.

a reply to: BigBrotherDarkness

As picketing poultry protesters proudly proclaim (possibly),

"Free The Fowl!! Free The Fowl!!"

"Fettered feathers make for foul fowls!"

"Fair the fine fowl, found freely foraging!"

a reply to: Nothin

Yes chicken do have teeth; I've owned one before a Bantam rooster a very kind old lady gave me when I was a child, I named him Chicken George... he would come when I called him and he lived well over 12 years, I didn;t like being woken up at his crowing so I used to gently pinch his beak shut and go shhhh after a few days shhh worked with no gentle pinching the beak shut then a few more days he stopped harkening in the dawn... and I could sleep without being disturbed.

But yes on the top of the beak called an "egg" tooth used to break from it's shell, sometimes it falls off sometimes it stays, and also towards the creases of the mouth inside the beak there are tiny roundish nodules that appear as teeth, of course in their neck is the gizzard which contains a pocket of small stones and sand picked up to grind and seeds etc around like a mill stone that can and is used similar to a camels hump. Of course the camels hump does not go away like the gizzard empties but how weird would that be if it did?

If I had my choice when little though; it wouldn't have been George it would have been a Guiena hen; I liked them because they were fast, made a neat sound and had polka dotted feathers... only years and years later did I realize they were female peacocks; the old woman in her wisdom knew that the little bantam chick who would later become "Chicken George" was the better choice.

He was not only free range and free from the range.

a reply to: lostgirl

Hmm if that is your philosophy? Might want to re-think the term poultry in usage as that directly points to harvesting them for food. Since my pet rooster died over 25 years ago I have probably eaten less than 5lbs of chicken, not really something I have ever enjoyed eating even before having a rooster as a pet; but as a guest it is rude to turn one's nose up at whatever one presents to you as a meal.

a reply to: BigBrotherDarkness

Here's a toast to old Chicken-George. RIP.

And no: RIP does NOT mean roast in peace.

a reply to: Nothin

Hmm I wonder whom George is now... he was a very considerate bird allowing me to alter his bird nature; to my personal preference, to always stop whatever he was doing and come running when called. Very likely not a bird any longer in the rounds of migration and doubtful he "flew South" being such a way.

originally posted by: Nothin
Why are you assuming that the chicken did not give permission? Perhaps it did...
Are chickens capable of giving permission? Do they have a sense of humour?
Are they capable of being offended?
Do chicken have teeth?

Did you hear the one about the... NVM.

I was actually implying the same thing you are: from a logical point of view, we both don't know the answer to any of the questions I asked or that you have just mentioned.

If you are making the claim that a chicken can somehow give you permission to tell a joke about it or answer any of those other questions you asked, then please enlighten us with some evidence. Otherwise, you are risking offending the chicken (or chickens as a whole), even if it is not your intention.

I get it: you tried to use a seemingly 100% innocent example of a joke that couldn't possible offend anyone or anything as a means to challenge the entire premise of my opening post. Well, so far you have not been able to accomplish this and have in fact helped me demonstrate that the opening post is truthful.

I welcome you or anybody else to find an example of a joke that cannot be considered offensive in any context it is used. I am confident you will find this task impossible because the ideology you are arguing against does not, at its core, adhere to logic and reason.

You all wanna know what's funny? We have managed to build a conceptal subjective bubble ladder all the way to mars, after launching countless dogs, cats, apes and people almost into space and into space... and on Mars there several nuclear powered remote controlled vehicles that cost billions of dollars to put there, one even has a trillion dollar bill attached to it with Barack Obamas face on it and the first music Mars has ever had on it's surface? We blasted The Black Eyed Peas...

If there is an intelligence out there watching all of this? We don't need to weaponize space; with phazers and photon missles... it is pretty clear that our insanity is the greatest weapon we have.

I mean we take all of that very seriously; and yet it is the most ludacris thing imaginible especially when millions starve everyday.

originally posted by: Dark Ghost

originally posted by: Nothin
Why are you assuming that the chicken did not give permission? Perhaps it did...
Are chickens capable of giving permission? Do they have a sense of humour?
Are they capable of being offended?
Do chicken have teeth?

Did you hear the one about the... NVM.

I was actually implying the same thing you are: from a logical point of view, we both don't know the answer to any of the questions I asked or that you have just mentioned.

If you are making the claim that a chicken can somehow give you permission to tell a joke about it or answer any of those other questions you asked, then please enlighten us with some evidence. Otherwise, you are risking offending the chicken (or chickens as a whole), even if it is not your intention.

I get it: you tried to use a seemingly 100% innocent example of a joke that couldn't possible offend anyone or anything as a means to challenge the entire premise of my opening post. Well, so far you have not been able to accomplish this and have in fact helped me demonstrate that the opening post is truthful.

I welcome you or anybody else to find an example of a joke that cannot be considered offensive in any context it is used. I am confident you will find this task impossible because the ideology you are arguing against does not, at its core, adhere to logic and reason.

Are you saying it's possible to offend a chicken?
What is the requisite for offense to be taken? How can you be sure?
Can all living beings be offended?
What about inanimate objects?

a reply to: Nothin

What about inanimate objects?

You dust don't you? If not better make a pledge to do so... all I know is inanimate objects really really like lemon scent whether real or synthetic or so I have been led to believe.

My grandfather used to keep chickens. The one's in the coup didn't have a clue what was about to happen when he went into the barn to harvest dinner. However, the one kept as a pet, would absolutely freak out, squawk and hide when he saw him pick up the axe. That chicken was offended!

originally posted by: BigBrotherDarkness
a reply to: Nothin

What about inanimate objects?

You dust don't you? If not better make a pledge to do so... all I know is inanimate objects really really like lemon scent whether real or synthetic or so I have been led to believe.

Hello BBD old friend.
Nyet: don't dust.
Perhaps someone has been telling you stories about the likes of inanimate objects?
But some may be true: like how much my car likes the smell of gasoline.

a reply to: Nothin

Oh yah cars love gas or else it leaves them fuming... of course any excuse for a nice walk even an unexpected one can be a good thing, perhaps you went too long without one so the universe reminds you of how nice it is... even if it is cursing under ones breath the entire time.

Some natives believed the rocks held spirits and essence and well being atoms are surrounded by energy why not? Flint sets of sparks of energy when struck, and natives used to even strike rocks purposefully to set energies free as a spritual practice... kinda like taking things nice and slow in one's personal work in appreciation of the materials or techniques involved, not just slapping crap together or sloshing things around to get them done and out. That's the difference in artisanal work... one would likely never see a return on their investment other than the enjoyment of the time being put into it.

Of course as an artist; one can see every single flaw in it like each and every mm is getting a thumb whacked with a hammer of this could have been better that could have been better; and in such a view all of it is absolute crap... but that just means room for improvement and honing skills, it also means one needs to just let go in the spirit of wabi sabi or basically good enough it stands as it is; and in such a manner imperfection itself is an art form... beauty being in the eye of the beholder? Many unless an artisan in the same field themself will never see the flaws; and if one in the field makes a comment, then best to not take an egoist offence and get defensve and make excuses... but see it as constructive and a grand opportunity that they may give you some insight for what may have made it less flawed.

Can't be taught is a hideous thing; even someone at the very top level of their craft or art whatever that may be? Know there is some flaw as that eye of seeing every flaw never goes anywhere except in egotism and self agrandizment that has absolutely nothing to do with the work or art, meaning they may have a masterpiece but have failed to be one.

originally posted by: BigBrotherDarkness
a reply to: Nothin

Oh yah cars love gas or else it leaves them fuming... of course any excuse for a nice walk even an unexpected one can be a good thing, perhaps you went too long without one so the universe reminds you of how nice it is... even if it is cursing under ones breath the entire time.

Some natives believed the rocks held spirits and essence and well being atoms are surrounded by energy why not? Flint sets of sparks of energy when struck, and natives used to even strike rocks purposefully to set energies free as a spritual practice... kinda like taking things nice and slow in one's personal work in appreciation of the materials or techniques involved, not just slapping crap together or sloshing things around to get them done and out. That's the difference in artisanal work... one would likely never see a return on their investment other than the enjoyment of the time being put into it.

Of course as an artist; one can see every single flaw in it like each and every mm is getting a thumb whacked with a hammer of this could have been better that could have been better; and in such a view all of it is absolute crap... but that just means room for improvement and honing skills, it also means one needs to just let go in the spirit of wabi sabi or basically good enough it stands as it is; and in such a manner imperfection itself is an art form... beauty being in the eye of the beholder? Many unless an artisan in the same field themselves will never see the flaws; and if one in the field makes a comment, then best to not take an egoist offence and get defensive and make excuses... but see it as constructive and a grand opportunity that they may give you some insight for what may have made it less flawed.

Can't be taught is a hideous thing; even someone at the very top level of their craft or art whatever that may be? Know there is some flaw as that eye of seeing every flaw never goes anywhere except in egotism and self aggrandizement that has absolutely nothing to do with the work or art, meaning they may have a masterpiece but have failed to be one.

Totally get the artisanal point-of-view, and you described it very well.
Have contemplated it in different art-forms. as well as work-forms.
Comedy and joke-telling, are they such art-forms?
Do expressions made through art get a free pass, or can they be offensive?
Who, or what part of us gets offended?
But: does your post end with a harsh judgement?

originally posted by: Nothin
Are you saying it's possible to offend a chicken?
What is the requisite for offense to be taken? How can you be sure?
Can all living beings be offended?
What about inanimate objects?

Are you baiting me, or are you generally asking to discover my perspective? There is no point in us wasting ATS bandwidth unnecessarily if you are just doing it for giggles...

Look, I'm not blaming you exclusively but we are really deviating from the deeper issue behind the opening post. "That every joke is offensive in some way" is a small side argument that is not worthy of discussion to the extent we are heading.

a reply to: Nothin

Hmm art is never really completed it is an attempt at it's completion, even if a piece is called done... that's not the end. Of course I am one of those insufferible bastards that see all life animate and inanimate as art one large fuild homogenious mass.

Seeing how one's art of living is also critiqued and judged even in death? Keep chiseling away even from the belly of worms you may find yourself in as they are also in yours.

The ideas one is done? That there ever is some finality... only when one moment passes to the next does such occur. I honestly can't point to that for anyone except as an expression of art... that's my scent left behind like a dog cocking it's leg towards a tree. If I leave whitish walls lighter underneath where things used to hang? Then I have failed. If I leave a nice corpse with organs worth harvesting? I have failed. If my personality can be mimmicked by a single person in sameness in the face of all that is or ever will be? I have failed. Who would I have failed?

Only the I that has been successfully murdered to which all I do goes to a moratorium and tribute for having lain it throughly to rest.