"Science Explains How Complaining is Negatively Altering Your Brain"

a reply to: Caver78

VERY EXCELLENT POINTS.

IT *IS* HARD work to change such deeply rooted habits.

And that's part of the point of the OP.

STOP WIRING THE BRAIN IN INCREASINGLY DYSFUNCTIONAL AND DESTRUCTIVE WAYS.

BEGIN TO REWIRE IT IN HEALTHY, CONSTRUCTIVE WAYS!

I'd have thought that such an assertion would have been a no-brainer to be virtually totally agreeable about.

Silly me! LOL.

But then, this IS the net . . . and this IS ATS with a regular raft/pack of rabid dogs compulsively addicted to complaining, whining and being generally obnoxiously prickly.

Thankfully, we didn't yet get those characters on the thread. LOL.

Thanks for your great post.

a reply to: BO XIAN

The world isn't always ready to hear or help people. While I can understand being annoyed at frivolous complaining I am concerned with the idea of people suffering in silence if they're powerless to change their environment.

I don't disagree that complaining can cause brain damage. It certainly would locking the brain into such a pattern.

I do share your frustration however having helped people yet they want more and more and more to the point where they drain and destroy others.

Yep they suck.

a reply to: riley

Serious levels of RAD with some personalities leave the person a virtual bottomless pit of raging NEEDINESS.

No amount of listening; no amount of healthy affection; no amount of patience; no amount of giving etc. seems to EVER be near enough.

I think such folks need an intense residential experience of 1-3 years with very loving and very healthily affectionate folks--particularly a father figure . . . and helpers who will also teach and require improved though habits and improved communication habits. . . . Cognitive Behavioral Therapy etc. etc. etc.

But such is just not available in practical terms. So millions muddle through rather poorly.

Even when complaining is not frivolous--and is more reality based having to do with real very horrendous experiences and events . . . it is STILL THE CASE that chronic complaining even about real things--is just NOT PRODUCTIVE, NOT HEALTHY, NOT EFFECTIVE, NOT USEFUL.

a reply to: BO XIAN

Humanity generally has always had lot of disdain for beggars and leapers. If you've been at the bottom of the heap for too long you may or may not moan about it.

Interesting.

What do those in the lower classes do when they are enduring generational suffering?

a reply to: riley

My mother grew up "poor white trash" in the South. She never let me forget it.

But she didn't appreciate chronic complainers.

Have you ever read Maya Angelou's chapter on complaining? Let me see if I can find it . . .

from:

Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now

Complaining

.
When my grandmother was raising me in Stamps, Arkansas, she had a particular routine when people who were known to be whiners entered her store. Whenever she saw a known complainer coming, she would call me from whatever I was doing and say conspiratorially, "Sister, come inside. Come."

Of course I would obey.

My grandmother would ask the customer, "How are you doing today, Brother Thomas?" And the person would reply, "Not so good." There would be a distinct whine in the voice. "Not so good today, Sister Henderson.

You see, it's this summer. It's this summer heat. I just hate it. Oh, I hate it so much. It just frazzles me up and frazzles me down. I just hate the heat. It's almost killing me." Then my grandmother would stand stoically, her arms folded, and mumble, "Uh-huh, uh-huh."

And she would cut her eyes at me to make certain that I had heard the lamentation.

At another time a whiner would mewl, "I hate plowing. That packed-down dirt ain't got no reasoning, and mules ain't got good sense.... Sure ain't. It's killing me. I can't ever seem to get done. My feet and my hands stay sore, and I get dirt in my eyes and up my nose. I just can't stand it."

And my grandmother, again stoically with her arms folded, would say, "Uh-huh, uh-huh" and then look at me and nod.

As soon as the complainer was out of the store, my grandmother would call me to stand in front of her. And then she would say the same thing she had said at least a thousand times, it seemed to me.

"Sister, did you hear what Brother So-and-So or Sister Much-to-Do complained about? You heard that?"

And I would nod. Mamma could continue,

"Sister, there are people who went to sleep all over the world last night, poor and rich and white and black, but they will never wake again. Sister, those who expected to rise did not, their beds became their cooling boards and their blankets became their winding sheets.

And those dead folks would give anything, anything at all for just five minutes of this weather or ten minutes of that plowing that person was grumbling about.

So you watch yourself about complaining, Sister. What you're supposed to do when you don't like a thing is change it.

If you can't change it, change the way you think about it.

Don't complain."

It is said that persons have a few teachable moments in their lives. Mamma seemed to have caught me at each one I had between the ages of three and thirteen.

Whining is not only graceless, but it can be dangerous.

It can alert a brute that a victim is in the neighborhood.

[extra paragraphing added]



www.amazon.com...=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1468974826&sr=1-1&keywords=wouldn%27t+take+nothin g+for+my+journey+now+by+maya+angelou

I think that's as good an example of a wise perspective from the impoverished ranks as I can think of.

a reply to: BO XIANah ha ha great story.... go wine into your Baba as wise as my calico grams says... so ear a berry bush and scram.

a reply to: BO XIAN

I think it's ironic you're proving yourself right with me.

a reply to: riley

Life has an abundance of ironies.

And, I do try and find honorable common ground, where workable etc.

Thx