Keeping Track

This is another about a relationship in college. Again, copywrited. (this is the niot happy one, the earlier is the happy one lol)

Keeping Track

His eyes are on me
-so warm.
And his touch,
see how nice.
And I laugh and laugh
and woke up screaming.
He was in my sleep
and I couldn't breathe.
So, giggle to pretend
and like to kiss.
Like so much to kiss.

No matter what, I said.
I wouldn't leave.
Anything...nothing.
I don't want to be this strong.
The strength of his arms,
the touch of his eyes-
they like to touch.
Want so much to touch.

Lost track of what
playing was
and what was real-
and what- at any moment-
I am supposed to feel.
Everything he says is a lie,
the words that built my world.
Want you to lie-
love the lies so much.

Reality fades in and out
of focus,
at the very borders
of fictions I have built.
A new twist on fantasy.
I need.
Give it to me .

I'm so numb
and robotically responsive-
to any stimuli you happen
to throw at me.
You've trained me this way-
to love nothing so much
and to so much love nothing.

a reply to: reldra

I really like this one Reldra.

They are both good! This, is just my favorite.

Well done!

originally posted by: TNMockingbird
a reply to: reldra

I really like this one Reldra.

They are both good! This, is just my favorite.

Well done!

Thank you TN I don't usually write dark ones, but the few I have seem to resonate with others.

originally posted by: reldra
Thank you TN

I don't usually write dark ones, but the few I have seem to resonate with others.

As if you are reaching down into one's soul and pulling out the words that they may be unable to speak.

That's quite a talent!

originally posted by: TNMockingbird

originally posted by: reldra
Thank you TN

I don't usually write dark ones, but the few I have seem to resonate with others.

As if you are reaching down into one's soul and pulling out the words that they may be unable to speak.

That's quite a talent!

TY When I write poetry, it is not just for me. It would be 1 dimensional if I did. I want to connect with people who read it. I keep that in mind as I write and the poen often becomes something somewhat different than what I planned. In some cases I think 'autommatic writing' .

A lot of women can remember relationships like this. They can be emotionally abusive, like mine or physically abusive. I only hope that I described either one well. I worked off of mine and expanded a little.