I Got the Funk (might be a tad gross)

I got the funk!

No, not that kind of funk; not even Grand Funk Railroad, although it feels like I've been hit by a freight train.
I just got back from vacation last week and what do you know, I get sick. My throat feels like somebody took an ice pick to it, my sinuses are even hurting, I'm coughing all day and night and have had little sleep, and I keep hacking up these green chunks of lung butter, too. It also feels like somebody is sitting on my chest. Cough drops don't work. I've been using them but hell my throat is so bad I might as well be sucking on a rock. The damn things are nasty, too. They're supposed to be honey lemon but the last time I checked honey lemon doesn't taste like somebody puked in my mouth. To make things ever so much more wonderful is since I'm so tired from lack of sleep and feeling like death warmed over I keep snapping at people-which I hate.

Man Flu?

Suck it up buttercup, 'tis the season for it.

You need plenty of brandy, it doesn't kill the germs, but it will help you sleep.

Apple cider vinegar NOW. Organic and raw baby.

Break your day into quarters and try to down a double shot at each interval.

a reply to: Cobaltic1978
I might ask my buddy if he has moonshine. After a few shots of that I won't care lol.

a reply to: eisegesis
That's good for sore throats? At this point I'll try anything. Thanks!

Orthomolecular medicine, baby... you won't never get sick with the info, but you can cut the instances, severity and duration of illnesses down with vitamin supplements...

to keep it simple, just take a few grams of vit c (around 10-20 grams should do it, but spread it out into 3 gram doses) and drink a lot of water... take a whole lot of vit c as L-ascorbic acid (some brands are cheap and won't have the effect so look for that "L" in front of the ascorbic acid). The worse that will happen with an "overdose" is diarrhea and that's a sign you finally have enough and your body is dumping it.

Eh, you could just read up at www.vitamincfoundation.org too, for a more expert opinion, but this stuff works ... people are all over it and seem like cultists because it works.

Lung butter is the term I use when trying to gross folks out, heh...

ETA: okay, I found the exact protocol that helped me ...and don't neglect the vit d, too, but here...

www.vitamincfoundation.org...

originally posted by: Skid Mark
a reply to: Cobaltic1978
I might ask my buddy if he has moonshine. After a few shots of that I won't care lol.

Supplement the shot of cider with some band-aid medicine like menthol or eucalyptus hard candies or even chemical numbing sprays. You want to get to the root of the problem, not mask it and hope for the best. With that said, I do recommend some gin and tonic with a side of "joint" pain relief.

Good luck.

a reply to: Skid Mark

Forget the cough drops. Just buy some decent hard candy or candy canes or something. The swallowing action is what soothes the throat. Lots and of fluids and ride it out old friend. Go moderate on the booze. Becoming dehydrated on top of your funk will make you feel worse.

It's been going around. I had it a couple weeks ago.
Big chug of 'Tussin chased down with a shot of whiskey helped me through it.

For sore throat? When I'm awake I chug lots and lots of hot tea. Take your pick of blend, but it's the hot liquid going down more than anything that soothes.

a reply to: Skid Mark

I find a nice sip of whiskey is good for the ol' respiratory system.

I was really badly congested last month with phlegm filling my lungs, took a shot of whiskey and it cleared me up enough that I made it to the hospital the next day with just barely a breath left (I went in on my own will power but I could barely walk).

I'm asthmatic so it's not something I'm not used to having happen.

a reply to: Baddogma
Thanks. I'll check that out.
By the way, don't you think it's a little funny telling a guy with the name "Skid Mark" about something that causes the runs?

a reply to: eisegesis
I'm going to town tomorrow. I'll pick some up. I hope I'm lucky enough to find the "joint" pain relief too. Wink Wink.

a reply to: the owlbear
I'll go easy on the shine. My room is upstairs. The last thing I want to do is play paratrooper stepping off a step wrong.

a reply to: threeeyesopen
I'm glad that you made it to the hospital. That's not something to mess with.

There is a formula out there for mixing apple cider vinegar and honey. You can take a shot of that to help soothe your throat too. The honey helps it coat more. It's a natural remedy and we used it on our son when he was too young for cough and throat meds.

a reply to: Skid Mark

Lol at the title of your thread, combined with your user name, oh and can't forget the lung butter! Just spit out my coffee, thanks for the laugh.

Tea with honey might help. I've been drinking emergen-c and airborne all day everyday for the last week, everyone is sick

Hope you feel better soon

a reply to: Skid Mark

Get the good sudafed stuff - the one where you have to show ID. Buy a bottle of nasal saline solution spray mist.

Seems your sinuses might be draining into your throat, causing a secondary foothold on the germs. Dry the sinuses and you'll calm the cause of the throat and lung butter.

Get the cheap bottles of red wine - go with a Merlot - get a couple. Guzzle them down - the nasty wine will kill whatever funk is in your throat.

In the am after the wine bing, take yer sudafed - take plenty of water too. To keep the throat funk down while the sudafed takes effect, suck on a garlic clove. Spray your nose holes to keep things moist.

Avoid Guaifenesin if you can - as this with alcohol will cause liver damage.

Booze it up and bundle up.

a reply to: ChuckNasty

Good lord... SkidMark's description was fun to read at least. Your remedy just made me vurp a little!

a reply to: Skid Mark
Actually old Gregg's got the funk