The fetishisation of grief on Facebook

originally posted by: woodwardjnr
There was once a time when we could grieve personally in quiet contemplation, now it seems the era of social media has forced us to adopt a fetishisation of grief, where everyone must out do one another to show how much grief they are in and how much they support France. It was an awful tragedy, but let's put things in perspective. The 20th century was one of the most violent and deadly century ever, yet our grand parents got through it it all with dignity and humanity in tact so they could pass on their genes to us. They dealt with larger immigration issues and 2 horrendous world wars. Yet what I'm seeing on Facebook, is like a competition of grief, no longer a private issue, but one to be shared with everyone they have ever met. I just find it all a bit pathetic really. I just find it all a bit weird. My thoughts go out to the families, but I can't bring myself to mourn for a whole nation in such fashion. If we want to defeat Isis, having a tricolour parsed over your face isn't going to solve the issue. Not while your still voting in governments who cosy up to Saudi Arabia. The biggest exporters of terrorism and extremist Islam ideologies. We even have our royal family entertain these criminals for tea and continue to sign lucrative defence contracts with some of the most hardline countries in the region who crush dissent at a whim and we will continue to do so. They will continue to fund madrases schools in the uk and around Europe, but people will still vote for these spineless governments and hand over more powers to the surveillance state. In the name of fear of terrorism.

Social media isn't required you can leave it whenever you want to,I know I don't regret it and I don't miss the drama it creates,since I left Facebook my life has been 95% drama free.

a reply to: TruthxIsxInxThexMist

Then we shouldn't have involved ourselves in their problems & make those problems worse.
If I misunderstood what you said please explain.

a reply to: supamoto

In a way I agree totally that we shouldn't have got involved in their problems but on the other hand if we had just sat still and not done anything, we would have got pillored for not doing anything and as a result there probably would have been more massacres and genocides if we hadn't.

a reply to: TruthxIsxInxThexMist

I did read your post correctly, and re-read it after seeing your comment. Considering I am not the only one who interpreted your post with this context, perhaps it is you who have not expressed your meaning correctly.

To further explain my cynicism regarding government influence and terrorism, go and read the new thread just up, we are being played by our rulers and most are falling for it. new thread

a reply to: TruthxIsxInxThexMist

If you look at the link I posted above, you will see it was us that took the fight to them, using their infighting, distrust and extremism to manipulate them into doing our bidding and not even see the bigger and very real picture. Our leaders played them way back then as they are still doing, and they are also playing us so we go along with it. It's like a giant game of human chess, and until the masses wake up and see how they are being lead by the ring in their nose, we are all doomed and there will only be war.

a reply to: CthulhuMythos

I did take a look at it and i guess i have to agree with your post above.... if it's all true!

That's the problem we face today... True or False.

It's hard to know what is True & False with so many people bringing different stories to the table.

It's like when people on ATS dismiss reports from The Express, Daily Mail, The Sun et al because they have been told that those media outlets are tabloids who don't spin the whole truth and that the Leftie media is all correct and ALWAYS telling the truth.

a reply to: TruthxIsxInxThexMist

Thanks for that.
Fact is these people have been fighting each other for what seems like forever.
I use 'WE' because the Govs represent us the people.
We have only involved ourselves when it was of benefit to us.
I don't think we care about the peoples of the ME & others.
Social media & internet based reporting is being used to manipulate us into agreeing with hidden agendas.
Fortunately it also allows us to discuss leading to other conclusions that may be differ from the intended main line.

a reply to: TruthxIsxInxThexMist
This is why we all need to scrutinise every influential event, look at history and outcomes of previous events and not treat everything as separate instances, but look for the patterns and connect the dots to what else is going on that looks at first unrelated and see if there is a connection. We need to learn from the past in order to see through the smoke screens of the present and on to the end goal of the agenda. It's hard to do, especially with the sophisticated techniques the alphabet agencies have developed, as they have studied us, and learned from our past responses the best way to manipulate us so that we don't even see what they are up to. This is why I am cynical and say use your head not your heart when these events happen, because it will be 40+ years before elements of the real agenda on an event are found/released, but by then it is way passed and forgotten.

I agree with the Daily Mail thing, just because the messenger has a bad reputation, does not mean all messages are rubbish, it just means we need to do a bit more investigation to pull out the truth and discard the exaggeration and psy-popping, or else we end up like the villagers in the Boy Who Cried Wolf story, and miss the important stuff when it gets reported.

My best advice in this world of madness and manipulation is to stay alert and think what agenda and who really made a particular event happen. Look through the veil of deceit and stay safe.

originally posted by: VashTheStampede


Social media isn't required you can leave it whenever you want to,I know I don't regret it and I don't miss the drama it creates,since I left Facebook my life has been 95% drama free.

Yeah I took myself off FB about 4 or 5 years ago... couldn't stand it any more.
It's just a pathetic invention for the me me me generation.

But I also understand that for some it's a way to keep in touch and they don't all abuse it in the way that many do so I'm not attacking anyone who chooses to use it.

Public grieving is not new. It wasn't new with Princess Diana's death either. When Elvis died there was mobs of people everywhere and people stepping out of their homes into the street with tears streaming down their faces. When JFK was assassinated. After 9/11 here in the US, same thing with people just going outside and looking for other human faces that were feeling their same pain and shock. Those are just the ones that come to immediately to my mind... there's thousands.

Social media is just a new instant way to do it.

For me grieving is a non-event. I did not feel any sorrow for the lives lost when those planes crashed into the Twin Towers even as I watched videos of people jumping out of the windows to their deaths. I was not upset when Princess Diana died. And I feel nothing for the latest deaths of the terrorist attacks in Paris. I agree that such things are so very tragic but emotionally I do not even get angry or tearful.

Could this be an indication of something wrong with my thought process. Have I been desensitized to violence to such an extent.

originally posted by: CthulhuMythos
Did all these countries just happen to have the red white and blue gels for the floodlights to hand and ready to go within hours of the event? When did the semi transparent overly button become available on Facebook?

I'm glad you brought that up, I noticed it too! They were ready!
Have you seen the picture of the lady hanging from a window by her fingertips? I'll bet wages that we never get a hi res close up of that picture because if we did we'd see the harness! The average person these days does not have the strength in their hands to hold themselves for more than a few seconds by their fingertips.

a reply to: woodwardjnr

Yeah, it's all a bit much isn't it, fakebook is a sea of tricolours right now, #prayforparis everywhere, "My heart is broken for Paris" type posts and all the rest of it.
Maybe I'm desensitised to it all because I just wonder how many other folk were brutally murdered in the world on Friday that nobody gives a # about.

At least the victims in Paris have top medical treatment for the injured, welfare benefits for grieving families who may have lost the breadwinner, counseling, etc, that's a hell of a lot more than the 40 or so poor folk who were bombed in Lebanon last week.

...ah, but the folk who died in France were European so that's supposed to make a difference apparently.
Pathetic and makes me cringe how so many unaffected people have just been sucked into the event by the media.
Expect a week of televised funerals now and back stories of the individuals who were tragically killed...I guess it sells newspapers.

originally posted by: VoidHawk


I'm glad you brought that up, I noticed it too! They were ready!
Have you seen the picture of the lady hanging from a window by her fingertips? I'll bet wages that we never get a hi res close up of that picture because if we did we'd see the harness! The average person these days does not have the strength in their hands to hold themselves for more than a few seconds by their fingertips.

Wow.... really??
Sheesh.

So when adrenaline kicks in people can fight off bears, lift a car to save their child, fight off a gang of 4 men or countless other things but a woman cannot hold onto a ledge for dear life??!!??

Do you even hear yourself?

a reply to: CthulhuMythos

Am I synical? You bet I am

You are not synical but honestly cynical...great post

a reply to: woodwardjnr
Are you talking about the weird red, white, and blue avatars that are supposed to represent the French flag and "show support"? I noticed half my friends list jumping on the bandwagon and having them. Weird.

a reply to: grainofsand

I was talking about it with my brother earlier and he mentioned the attacks in Lebanon, which no one really gives a hoot about. Then he told me during the 2nd world war thousands of people were dying every day both combatants and innocents. It's ridiculous. I guess it's my own fault for going on Facebook, but it's still a good way of keeping in touch with friends I don't see who live a long way from me. I also like to use the messenger for keeping in touch, but the reaction has been way over the top. I doubt you've become desensitised, but are just capable of putting things in perspective

a reply to: woodwardjnr

I guess we should expect nothing less with fakebook these days though, it is after all the same place full of posts of say random disabled babies, with a line such as "Like if you care, scroll down if you're heartless" etc.
The question I wonder is how long will it before the next outpouring of 'grief' brings along its 'solidarity overlay' for profile pictures and those who do not partake will automatically be deemed heartless, or even enemies of the state?
Food for thought at least.

a reply to: VoidHawk

yup I did see that and thought she was doing awfully well holding on all that time until another girl came to the rescue, though the footage stopped before you could see how she managed to get lifted up. Adrenalin can indeed do wonderful things, and she did look like she might have been standing on something with her right foot, so that would have taken most of her weight. I did see her left foot dangle a little and also her left hand let go of the ledge a couple of times too, plus she was rather slender. Maybe there was a verticle bar that she was holding onto that is not easy to see with that resolution so she was fairly well supported but in a precarious place?

originally posted by: TheConstruKctionofLight
a reply to: CthulhuMythos

Am I synical? You bet I am

You are not synical but honestly cynical...great post

Thank you TheConstruKctionofLight.... I really do try to get my spelling correct, and often fail miserably! My ipad didn't give me a help with that one either (even though I tried lots of permutations too!) and so I had to google it, but by the time I got back to the page and typed it in, well either brain failure, finger trouble or just stubborn ipad changing it back, who knows lol. Of course now it is too late to edit it, sheeesh! I think I got it right in a later post though

Thank you for pointing out my dreadful spelling, will try harder in future

a reply to: woodwardjnr

Interesting post. I agree it is attention seeking behaviour. I have also noticed a trend with certain women on YouTube who feel compelled to do a 'cry with no make-up on' video every time they hit a bump in life. I just don't get it.