Do You Find Yourself Doing This TOO?

How many of you judge a book by it's cover?

A movie by it's title?

A person by their looks?

How about when reading an email, do you pretend to know what the tone of voice is?

If you get a letter in the mail from a family member do automatically hear their voice in your head while you are reading it?

How about on an ATS level, do you judge a member by their name?

Their avatar?

Do you find yourself imagining what they look like or what gender they may be based on specific phrases?

Do you pretend to know what they sound like?

Do you think you can figure out their age?

Their color or race of origins?

Sexual preferences?

Religious affiliations?


I am curious to know how many of you have made assumptions about me?

Tell me, what gender, race, color, voice or age?

Being that this is an anonymous platform, unless you decide to communicate in a different format with specific members, how could you actually know who you are dealing with?

I would be curious to know how many of you think you have me pegged, I can't promise I will say one way or the other about all comments or observations as to the validity, but I would be very interested to know just the same. In fact, if wanted I will offer up my own view of any member that would care to have them.

I usually judge a book by what the back of the cover says about it and I try reading the first few lines to see if I will like it.
People, I go by the vibes I get as to whether or not I want to get to know them socially.
Here on ATS, I haven't been here too long, but if they are nice that's all that matters. If there is a difference of opinion with myself, I try for seeing both sides with understanding.
What I have gotten from you is that you are intelligent, outspoken and push limits in a humorous way that doesn't harm anyone.... but then again I'd have to read everything you've written here to even try to describe you, you do stand out and that's not a bad or good thing... just interesting.

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

I find myself on these baords questioning peoples motives,from what i can see friendships are formed on this forum and that directly affects the content,some members can be quite clicky and hard headed based on their friendships,to the point that all rational is thrown out the window

You're male, Most likely in the EU, Or EU lineage. I can't be sure about age but im going to place you between the age of 20-30 (large margin). Impossible to know your religious or sexual orientation.

Your voice is subjective, It will sound different in everyone's head until they actually hear it.

Am i close?

Edit: Im basing all this information on this post only. I haven't gone threw your post history (too lazy). I could probably tell your religion from that.

a reply to: peppycat

Well vibes work well in a personal setting if you have that ability. Your opinion of me did not go far enough.

I do have a caustic sarcastic funny to myself type of humor that often gets misjudged.

I have been ridiculed for some of my OP's and the point was often missed.

I am to blame for that because I take for granted that everyone reading it will get it, but my brain functions in my own little world.

I get an idea in my head and I start writing and often I post it without really doing what I need to do to formulate what it is I was trying to say.

In other words, it sounds better in my head and I know what my point is, but I can not control who reads it and who responds at the time I write it.

I do know subject matter plays a role and there are the requisite trolls to every thread about certain topics, but I generally know before I write something what to expect and I find myself correct most of time.

Still, it is rather humorous to me how often I find myself imagining what a member sounds like when I read what they write. Or their age or gender.

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

I think that it is best to ignore what you think you know about a person. Even their appearance can be deceiving, their tone of voice unhelpful in discerning anything particularly important about their character, and their inner being.

My avatar is a drunken fellow with long hair doing his thing. That speaks to nothing, absolutely nothing of my internal workings, the way my mind operates. Indeed, one might think from looking at my avatar, that my mind does not operate at all, given the constant consumption of an alcoholic beverage which is detailed therein.

I have been told before, that even the most in depth of my writings can be seen as a misdirect. I come across as older than my years to some, and here is a kicker, many people in my flesh life, away from the site, people I have known for nearly ten years, believe I am older than I actually am.

Given these things, I find it unhelpful to try and make judgements about fellow members, or assume that I know them well enough to guess at their vocal patterns, their demeanour away from the board, their internal construction. Certainly, some of the members here have shared aspects of their inner workings with me, in more intimate settings than right out here on the boards. Some have shown me the depths of their compassion and love, and that forces me to imagine them complexly, to attempt to put skin around the wireframe of the data I have pertaining to their person. But generally speaking, it is the opinions and arguments which I pay the most attention to here.

Of late, I have seen the colour of more souls around here, for want of a better term, and found them to be delightful and fearsome in equal measure, to be stalwart and kind at the same moment. But I would never pretend, never do such a dishonour to anyone here by suggesting that I know them well enough to make judgements about who they really are inside. I respect them all too much to attempt it. I much prefer to be shown willingly, than to try to Sherlock someone's character out from under them. It is theirs to share, not mine to finesse from them.

originally posted by: Tjoran
You're male, Most likely in the EU, Or EU lineage. I can't be sure about age but im going to place you between the age of 20-30 (large margin). Impossible to know your religious or sexual orientation.

Your voice is subjective, It will sound different in everyone's head until they actually hear it.

Am i close?

Edit: Im basing all this information on this post only. I haven't gone threw your post history (too lazy). I could probably tell your religion from that.

Not even remotely close, but good effort! Obviously, unless you hear someones voice you can not be certain what they sound like, but that doesn't stop me!

How I was raised religiously is not what I am. I have no allegiance to religion at all. Spiritual Highly. I am OCD about many things. I am heterosexual, but I believe everyone has a right to be who they are.

a reply to: TrueBrit

I can do you more easily i think.

You're pretty empathetic and compassionate. Very laid back and prefer a laid back lifestyle. But you're also very proud.. You hold you're self in high regards, But you are satisfied with who you are.

You don't care about tradition, You prefer to do you're own thing. Your are the oposit of a sheepish person.

Over all, You're a good person.

age between 35-45, male obviously, None religious. Europe is in your dialect.

originally posted by: soulpowertothendegree

originally posted by: Tjoran
You're male, Most likely in the EU, Or EU lineage. I can't be sure about age but im going to place you between the age of 20-30 (large margin). Impossible to know your religious or sexual orientation.

Your voice is subjective, It will sound different in everyone's head until they actually hear it.

Am i close?

Edit: Im basing all this information on this post only. I haven't gone threw your post history (too lazy). I could probably tell your religion from that.

Not even remotely close, but good effort! Obviously, unless you hear someones voice you can not be certain what they sound like, but that doesn't stop me!

How I was raised religiously is not what I am. I have no allegiance to religion at all. Spiritual Highly. I am OCD about many things. I am heterosexual, but I believe everyone has a right to be who they are.

To be fair, I just finished my 5th beer I would like to do you again if you give me permission, I can go threw all you're post. I spend my entire life profiling people (targets), I have literally spend 19 hours a day for the past 16 years in front of a computer with almost no real social interaction except online communications. With that comes with the ability to figure people out (I take advantage of people, Im a bad person, Im a sociopath). It's in my nature.

a reply to: TrueBrit

So you do not make any judgments at all about who you are reading? I do it all the time. I am not saying what I think is not always true, but it is difficult for me to not make some judgments.

You do not have a single observation or idea about who or what I am?

a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

I will say that motives are obvious for some. I personally, tend to try and motivate, but sometimes my motives are misunderstood.

That is my fault, because I do not always make myself clear. I do have a very strange sense of humor that is difficult to discern sometimes. Things can be very funny to me and not so funny to others.

I don't judge a book by the cover or a person by the looks, even if most of the time they are quite telling. Is their first words that make me decide if I'm interested to find out more about them or not.
I judge people by their action, and even then I know I can never grasp the full reasoning behind their actions, so what is the point of judging?
Most of the time I'm in full "live and let live" mode. I try not to mind for that which I cannot change.

I am curious to know how many of you have made assumptions about me? Tell me, what gender, race, color, voice or age?

Is a futile exercise and irrelevant from my point of view. Is what you wrote that matters to me, how you wrote it and sometimes why you choose to express yourself in that specific way. It wouldn't matter if you're black or female or whatever.
Sometimes I found it difficult to see things from your angle, but is interesting to try.
In this forum I usually read without preconceptions and if something resonates with me I answer or I give a star, or even argue if I'm sure that the point of view presented is wrong. If not I move on. Even the ones who annoy me the most sometimes get a star from me, because when they are right.... they are right

People make friends here, or enemies, but for me is just a virtual platform for exchanging info, opinions and personal experiences. When I shut down the computer and go out living my life nothing about what I think about some users or what they think about me really matters. Only what I've learned here does.

So as long as I think that there is something to learn even from the most twisted and nonconformist opinion I keep reading without judging who is behind it. Otherwise I rather play some online game

a reply to: Tjoran

It was not my intention to profile people in this OP. If someone wants to try and profile me or if they want someone to profile them that is fine, but the general purpose of this OP was to get ideas about others views of me.

You can try again, but I will not give specifics about certain aspects of my personality. I am American and I am older than you surmised.

Yea, I have to agree with TrueBrit. I find it very difficult to make any judgements based on posts or threads. You can get some of it from threads where people give clues or outright let you know, but bottom line is people are very complex a lot of time. You can get very different ideas based on what they are debating or discussing.

One thing I have learned and continue to learn is you can't make judgements about people. Most of the time you are way off. And I think making any judgements will make you read their posts based on some presumed definition of who or what they are. I have met excellent people of all types and the same goes for the opposite. I am often reminded of the saying, 'Don't Judge, Lest you Be Judged!'

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

Though I am vaguely aware that certain assumptions fly by sometimes, I tend to ignore them.
I go by the idea that it doesn't matter. All that matters is the words I am reading that they wrote, and responding to that authentically.

This is easier done over a screen, in this mode of communication.

But I sort of already have the habit of disregarding details about other persons, which is born of my own dislike of attention, which I instinctively apply to others. I don't like that people observe and take note of my shoes, of my appearence, of what kind of car I drive, of my current class status, or even my current emotional state.
I do not identify with these. They don't speak for who I am. I let them flow and change, without feeling any attachment to them. To me, when people focus on those details, it is like they grabbed on to the wake of my boat.

I also largely grew up in the city, where respecting peoples privacy by not paying attention to them is appropriate.
It has become a habit. I don't want anyone thinking of me when I am not around. I don't want to make an impact upon their mind and memory. I don't want them forming a fixed idea of who and how I am, which will be the undercurrent in their interactions with me, and influence my freedom to be authentic.


But I find this "respect" of others' privacy is seen, where I live, at least, as being egotistical or arrogant. It seems there are people who WANT attention, they want you too notice what shoes they are wearing, if they had their hair style changed, what kind of car they drive... and they want you to remember it and talk about them when they aren't around.

I totally do not yet get that. So my blinders stay on. I don't know who you are in terms of superficial stuff. All I'd like to do is ask you Who Are U now???

a reply to: spirit_horse

I have to agree it's almost impossible to gauge someone by a single post. But at the same time I disagree with the idea that it's not possible. People aren't as complicated as they seem and fall into a (large) handful of categories. Long term communication is key to figuring out personality traits and the type of person you are dealing with. For example, I'm surprisingly accurate describing my guild mates personality to them in a game based on just talking to them in guild chat over a period of a month. Even when no personal information is reveled to me.

a reply to: WhiteHat

There is judging and there being judgmental. Even when I am on the phone talking to someone I do not know there is a natural process that takes place instantly, and while it may not be entirely fair there is a tendency on my part to try and put a face to the voice at least. Sometimes it can be rather easy, but there can be a misconception if not guarded.

I do think that happens more often here, that it becomes a normal way of associating, I think I personally have been judged by other members. It does not change who I am and like you, when I get off the computer, I leave this behind. Still, I would be lying if I said it doesn't have some effect on me.

After all, I do spend quite a bit of time on here, admittedly I am a insomniac that deals with a tremendous amount of pain daily and I abstain from forms of medication to deal with so I am often sleep deprived when I am on here.

Fortunately, I do still have a huge amount of energy to draw from.

I have to admit, that although I try, I am horribly guilty. A few weeks ago I called a business about a customer service issue. The way the woman answered the phone, this is the impression I got.


I figured that any complaint I made would be filed in the round bin. I couldn't have been more wrong, she was so nice and helpful. She seemed to be genuinely upset about my issue. I felt horrible I had misjudged her by her voice.

Op, I tend to picture you as someone with a bubbly personality, I used to think of you are more serious, but in a passionate way. My perception of you has changed over time. It is evolving, a work in progress. As you are. I am also guilty of confusing you with someone else, who clouded my opinion of you.

I don't know how many people are like this and if it's good or not, but i can't be bothered to care.
It takes too much effort to try and figure people out in advance and to sort them into categories.
All that guess work is tedious.
I guess it helps some people so they can feel like they have "figured you out" and feel safer.
But a request is a request, so here goes:
Gender: i'd say a girl just because i connect the sounds Lemuria and Atlantis with the feminine for reasons i don't even know
race/ colour: probably mixed, no real reason, i just like variety
voice: being i said you are a girl, i don't think you sound like larry king...
Age: well from what i can tell the average age here seems to be 25-35 so let's call it 29

I guess you can tell how i never do this type of stuff ever...

originally posted by: soulpowertothendegree
a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

I will say that motives are obvious for some. I personally, tend to try and motivate, but sometimes my motives are misunderstood.

That is my fault, because I do not always make myself clear. I do have a very strange sense of humor that is difficult to discern sometimes. Things can be very funny to me and not so funny to others.

You've defiantly made me smile before and chuckle a bit. There is an underlying silly outgoingness to some of your posts and I've wondered if you had a little drink to lift the spirits.