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originally posted by: nerbot
a reply to: starwae
The first and foremost rule I employ when considering forgiveness is:
DOES THE PERSON I SHOULD FORGIVE DESERVE IT AND BE A BETTER PERSON AFTERWARDS.
Forgiving everyone and always is a weak option for those who cannot see further than the here and now imo. Sometimes it must surely be better to let someone live with the memory of their mistake without forgiveness. Perhaps it would help them percieve their own actions and more importantly, the consequences of those actions. Otherwise, where's the guilt to feed the sense of right and wrong.
Sometimes, forgiving can condone wrong doings and let people off the hook without a need to apologise or employ a sense of responsibility.
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave itto the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
originally posted by: Bluesma
I forgive, for myself. So I can be happy and not dragged down with bitterness.
It doesn't do anything at all for the other in some cases, and it doesn't matter to me whether they "deserve" it.