Mad ramblings about time and the true self.

So I was thinking,

This is coming from a testament to failures, victories, limbos, and extremes.

I wont endorse ego destruction. I wont encourage finding peace with a workable ego. I will say that ego is a small component to who we are truly and almost infinitesimal compared to the whole being which includes potential, destiny and fate.

We can see ourselves as a species, selection of that species based on physical attributes like climatological adaptations or social groupings...we can see ourselves as individuals or groupings there of. We can see ourselves in something so trivial and temporal like political groupings based loosely on how we feel about certain issues.

There is infinite meaning to be found in how we see ourselves in response to an infinite measure of ways to ask ourselves the question of "who are we"...or rather every instance of existence where we seek to express ourselves. Expressing our lives is a reaffirmation of life itself. To express ones life entails its happiness, overcome losses and those impossible defeats that we never overcome, humbling moments that bring wisdom, shining moments of golden suns upon resplendent skies for many moons. In short times of great prosperity and times of great despair that shape who we choose to be unto the world /universe we live in. These are the things that we tally up to measure who we are "feeling" like expressing at any particular phase in our lives and considering our life spans finite cycle like that of a clock counting down..or up.

We also seem to make a mistake in our process. Maybe "mistake" is not the right word. We are missing something from our process I feel.

We quantify time as well. IF I were to ask someone to tell me if john doe lived a "good" or "bad" life what would be the answer if John Doe; lived for the first 20 years of his life in an abusive poverty stricken home. Then spent 10 years of his best youngest years fighting in a brutal war that left him fried and dead inside...then for 20 years he spent his days cold and starving, then 5 years as a despicable criminal, and for 20 years a helpful useful person to others....and in the final decade and a half of life, fell in love, found peace with his past and settled all scores left with life like a gentleman and a scholar....

Its not a straight forward question because the answer itself is so convoluted in our own perception of time that we lose ourselves in the mortality we cant help but notice.

Its like seeing an innocent man walk out of jail after 40 years. You would think he is a little less free than anyone who was not stripped of their freedom ever or to that measure ever...even though that man is now as free as anyone else. Our personal truth and our social truth would come to the front and seek justice and morality in our observations.

Time changes things. Especially when we are trying to quantify existence or life and its order....We can not help but set a mortal tone to our thoughts that seek a higher form of ourselves.

That you that you find burred deep inside you. The one you call to when you are really down and you see the last threads fraying and about to break...That you is not infinite but rather just a reflection of the you that shone in the mirror he is.

There is a pattern to the ways that "you" comes out as well as an intelligence to the connections in syncronicity that brings that "you" to forefront naturally.

Time is not a factor in those moments. Like they are out of phase with time on a quantum level, or exist in a layer of space in between the matter and energy threshold.

Those moments are all linked somehow as well. They eventually end up feeling like they are even connected beyond your own experience of them. That somehow there is a palpable difference in the passage of "un-time"....or rather in between time. It feels as though there is a nexus of universal gnosis that we all call out to when in search of a true us. This person we seek to become can change over time and as per our demands. We become infinite variations of this person through out our "time"....but it is all sourced from a point that WE departed from....and we all know on some level that we were somewhere else mentally /spiritually when we first started life.

That core is there somehow, in those moments, those incredible and fleeting moments...like when an athlete performs flawlessly with his body in perfect harmony...or when a musician plays the best song in the world....what ever...those moments are all linked and what that means is that there is even more after the universal center.

So to this universal center, there is infinite variations there of, and then also a finite point of convergence for all universal forms, truths, and existences of matter energy and everything in between.

After /before and beyond time and space is.....something we can only barely see in a distance at times so few and far between that we can not even be sure that they happened at all.

There is more but I will save it.

Thanks for your time.

a reply to: tadaman

Very nice piece! Maybe clean up the 11th paragraph a little?

originally posted by: Enderdog
a reply to: tadaman

Very nice piece! Maybe clean up the 11th paragraph a little?

LOL

Here is the 11th paragraph, followed by my clean up.

That you that you find burred deep inside you. The one you call to when you are really down and you see the last threads fraying and about to break...That you is not infinite but rather just a reflection of the you that shone in the mirror he is.

Okay, here goes my "clean up":

"burred deep inside you..." is mystical power call THE WILL
and it your POWER to change, to choose life. We feel this
Power of Will most when our life is danger or threatened.
When we are at the end of our rope, "when the threads
are fraying and about to break." This essence of your
life force is revealed in such moments, and you know
the Eternal is not you. Who you "..is not infinite (god)
but rather just a reflection the man in the mirror."
Just a product of your environment. Your choices
and experiences manifest in one slice of time
after another, each one different, dynamic.

Did I get that right?

a reply to: tadaman

You said "something" is missing.

Yes, something is missing in most of our lives.
We can fill that void with things. Things to do,
things to wear, things to debate, anything to
shore up our eroding sense of self.

When speak to people who have crossed over
(died and come back) they describe "the Other"
as a place of utter peace, and feeling of being
home, a place that feels safe and secure. It is
also described as beyond time, or beyond our
time-based illusion.

Some people call it Heaven.

What ever name you give it, this place beyond
the physical is "other" than what we experience
in this world of FEAR, doubt and uncertain.
In this "other" we know who we are, and
we retain our individuality, but we know
longer value the valueless. In the OTHER
we know GOD and we are full known by
GOD, and to our amazement there is no
fear or guilt or shame.

What is missing will always be missing in
this world. Understand we are just passing
through, we sojourn in a foreign land.
Our home awaits us on the other side.

We are not waiting to die, rather we
are waiting to be born. So soak up all
the experience you can, and unlearn
those beliefs you cling to which are
based on false-authority. Empty your
self as best you can, so that when
you do cross over, you will ready
to accept Heaven as your home.

Empty yourself of beliefs, burn
off your karma, and be ready to
experience ascendance to a higher
state of being and consciousness
in the next life.

When this time-based illusion is
over, we have nothing to fear.

a reply to: wasaka

Yeah pretty much. Yup.



Beautiful words in the other post. I wholeheartedly agree.

Have a good one.
Hold it down.

a reply to: tadaman

I know it's hard to let go of those who were with you, apart of you from the start of you.
you wish they had a deeper view you hope one day they see it as you!
but it was from the start you somehow felt apart accepting and knowing is how you grew
but dispatching is something new
knowing is how you cope accepting is just a joke
when will the rope be broke I guess when you see you want to be the person you know you see and if it helps I have been waiting for you, it was you and me in the stars that unite so we can shine together as one light.

I was raised at the end of the frayed rope pride carried me and fear was always by my side, not a product of my environment but an opportunity to produce my product as MY environment which I made. Fear isn't your enemy he makes you aware of danger because he knows a hell of a lot more about life than us. The fear of the Lord is the first sign of wisdom which means that the wise fear me. Life is hard, what makes anybody think that it is to prepare us to leave the lights on all night and politely disagree with each other's personal truths. I'm not a product of my environment, I'm not looking in a mirror. There is a creature alive that can mirror me my right arm alone is at least two gods I'm an element of the environment because wherever I am I made that place and I am God there. It's still all love though.