I Love You Less

a reply to: Quauhtli

Wow!
I just logged on, and am overwhelmed with the lovely caring responses.
I am so very grateful for the support and friendship that I've received.
Most definitely time for a **group hug**...you guys are the BEST.

I love that some of you wrote poems for me (I love that MORE than I can express). Just the fact that you all took the time to make me feel loved...well, that definitely has over-ridden the 'blue' feeling that I was expressing yesterday.
Today I sit here smiling, knowing that you are all out there somewhere...being GOOD people...and although none of you are in my 'real life' (yet!)...I feel your love, and am basking in the warmth.

Thank you for being there for me when I needed someone. I am honestly more than willing to return the favour, if anyone ever needs me!

luv, jacy

a reply to: jacygirl
Between work having kept me away from home months at a time .. and half of them cheating on me (was always loyal to them ) .. things didnt work out as hoped ..
Maybe one day will find one that can share life with and grow old with .. but am an old cynic and gotten used to living by myself am the first to admit that at times Im not an easy person to live with ..
Ahh .. true my macaque does attract the ladies .. then he gets me bounced before get chance to talk to them ..

a reply to: Expat888

Aww Expat, I've been cheated on too.
I do know that when someone cheats, it's not because of YOU...it's about them.
Some people can't handle the time apart, and they find someone else to give them attention and make them feel good about themselves.
In my case, I was just SO busy with newborn twins and a 4-yr. old....that I didn't have the time or energy to stroke husband's...*cough*...EGO....so he found a woman at work who would. (Karma's a bitch though, hehe...he is still married to her...miserable and turning into an alcoholic...because it turns out, she is crazy!)

I've read a lot of your writing here, and I think you sound like a lovely person. Your drunken macaque stories make me laugh, and I honestly have never found you to be cynical. I hope that you do find someone to love and appreciate you, because in this world....love is all that really matters.

Sad was yesterday, today is a new day...and I remain, a hopeless optimist!
jacy

I have two guys sitting in my work truck putting your poem and mine together in a song. These two guys can't stop singing made up tunes, they do it all day long. It's a country version, you'd be proud. They also record a lot of what they put together, if it turns into something I'll try to share it here later.

a reply to: Quauhtli

Oh wow, really?!! That's amazing!!
Please post anything that you can...I would SO love hear it!
*waves at guys in work truck*

I make up songs all the time...or, I write my own words to existing songs, lol.
I am absolutely delighted that you guys are doing this!!!
*squishy hugs*

jacy

P.S. I wrote a song on here a while back, called "I Love to Star". It was meant to be replacement lyrics for the song "I Love This Bar" (Toby Keith). The thread died quickly lol, but I will dig around and see if I can find it....purely for your (and the truck guys) amusement!

a reply to: jacygirl
I call it...."I Love to Star".
We got writers, we got lurkers
Complimenters and irkers
And we got lovers, we got haters
We got sinkholes and craters
And the moderators that watch us from afar
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love to star

We got secrets, we got answers
Politicians and gangsters
And we got riots, train de-railments
Antidotes for your ailments
And a thread to talk about your brand new car
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love to star

(chorus): I love to star
My way to say thanks
Just flagging doesn't cut it
When you're rising thru the ranks
It ain't enough, you raise the bar
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love to star

You've seen Bigfoot, ghosts and chemtrails
Mutilated cows and their entrails
And I must have missed them
While I was nappin'
Catch phrase here is, 'pics or it didn't happen'
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love to star

It's so true I like this site
I like to learn
I like to read the recent postings
I like to give respect you earn
So I love to star
My way to say thanks
The trolls don't get in my way I just ignore their stupid pranks
Most writers here, are up to par
That's why... Hmm, hmm, hmm I love to star - See more at: www.abovetopsecret.com...

jacy

a reply to: jacygirl
Yep, thats beautiful.... A person who can write such a poem because of personal experiance will receive all good there is one day.. for sure.

a reply to: zatara

Aww, thank you zatara!

I really didn't expect such praise.
I do believe that 'what goes around comes around', and I'm grateful for all the Life lessons that I have learned. (not so grateful to my teachers, lol...but it is what it is.)

In the end, I'm quite content with who I am. I like myself, and think I'm a good person.
Abusers....they don't like themselves.
Sad, but...sucks to be them!

jacy

a reply to: jacygirl

You are a good person and a kind soul.
I'm sorry this sadness is raining down on you.
You don't deserve it.
You are in my thoughts ....

a reply to: FlyersFan

Oh geez hunny, thank you!
Can I hug you?
**hugs**

I'm okay, like a phoenix I keep rising from the ashes and moving forward.
I was hurt at the time, and when I wrote this poem I didn't expect to hear from anyone.

The love and kind words that I have received from everyone here MORE than makes up for the incident that hurt my feelings. I'm back in my 'good place'....and I have you all to thank for that!

jacy

a reply to: jacygirl


Awww ! Jace !

Hope this helps ...


www.abovetopsecret.com...

a reply to: jacygirl

I just play

a reply to: jacygirl

Jacy, having known you for a time now, I can FEEL for You in this writing!
This is also how my days usually go. Just in the past week there have been 4 days of "angst"!!
Thank You for putting that word out here. It fits my place in the physical realm. That's why I love to come here. It Really helps me 'get out'!!! Trance Techno pounding in the background here sets my mind free!!!!!!

Beautiful rendition of sadness and wonder.
Wonder of Why ME?! What did I do?!
I only want to Love.
Love.
Love......

a reply to: jacygirl
Love the poetry Jacygirl.

I know it sounds cliched but it did tug at my heart strings.

Funny actually as I just wrote in another thread that no matter how bad your day is, no one has a good enough excuse to abuse someone else.

It will certainly make me think a little more about what I say to people in the future.