posted on Apr, 30 2014 @ 02:31 AM
Ok, well I have figured some things out... when I was 3 years of age... the abuse started. I don't remember much until I am 7. When I was 7 years
old I remember being abused and another child, aged 9 was also there...what that did to my brain was condition it and here is how these fargon
bastages are getting away with a lot of bad things:
There are 'two of me'... because of the abuse, I developed an identity disorder (I thought I was the 9 year old) I am not her. I am the 'whore'...
whenever I see her face, my brain blacks out and I think it is a dream..."because I see who I think I am and then think I must be dreaming".. the
abuse or the event is blacked out and whatever happens, I will not know or remember.
My best advice to anyone is, practice looking at anyone who looks similar to you... keeping in mind, the person you see is not you. You are never
anything you can see. (unless looking in a mirror) When 'remembering'...you can view the event from all angles and that is also something to keep in
I have photos of myself at various ages and the other person I thought I was is also in other photos. It is so obvious now... I did not see the
differences at first.
When I was 7 I was very confused because of an event and my hair was very long and brown... well the person I thought I was, has thin blonde hair and
is 9... I remember my 'fake' mother curling my hair and sending me to school as 'her daughter' ... now I know why she did that because her hair was
not as long as mine. So that makes sense.
Quite simply, there are two People living one Person's life. Whenever she sees me or I see her, one of us will black out because we both were abused
and think we are each other. Whenever that happens, one of us comes out of a dark place and is 'waking up' or like me, standing confused without my
school bag on the foot path.
edit on CDT02000000Wed, 30 Apr 2014 02:33:34 -05003334am119 by Thurisaz because: typo