Proving that it is better to be dumb...

And I stand by what I said about homosexual men on the basis of every homosexual I've ever observed couldn't hold a relationship together because they all want to screw eachother and use eachother for mind altering substances.

XsweetNspiceyX
And I stand by what I said about homosexual men on the basis of every homosexual I've ever observed couldn't hold a relationship together because they all want to screw eachother and use eachother for mind altering substances.

I know quite a few homosexual men, some of them being relatives. You're absolutely spot on with that statement.
Prepare to get flamed, however.

I loved your OP. S&F from me

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX


I was sort of seeing this lady at one point, who I met when she was working around the corner from my store, and came in to our shop for supplies. She came in wearing no make up, a simple vest, a plain knee length skirt...

I thought she was a knock out. Trouble was, every time we went out, she would put make up on. Now, thats her right of course, but to me, it was like graffiti on the Mona Lisa, or a dodgy spray job on a classic car. Why alter such a natural source of wonder?

Our association ended due to other factors, but I always preferred seeing her in the morning, natural, than painted up like a china doll. There were deeper problems with that whole mess of a situation, but that's how I felt about the facade of it all.

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX


If someone likes you, they like you. You don't need to run around testing the theory, because in practice you CAN and WILL drive someone away who really does enjoy being around you when you start being someone else.

Let me explain:

If someone likes a beard, and you wear a beard when they meet you they usually find that beard sexy and attractive. It's something about you that enhances in their opinion.

If someone meets you and they think you are a nice person and kind, and they like you for your kindnesses, then this also is something they find attractive and sexy about you. Its something about you that enhances.

Perhaps someone you meet has a phobia, and they are afraid you will look down on them for it so they haven't yet mentioned it as it is too early in the relationship.

Now, take this girl, who likes you, thinks you are everything she would want to be with... your kind, sexy and attractive etc.

Then you go on the third date, this date you have shaved your beard, you force her to watch a movie that will give her nightmares for months to come even after she asked you to pick another movie please, and in general you are rude.

Now she decides that you are an asshole, and her attraction to you was all based on a lie, because that kind and attractive person she met doesn't exist, so she walks. Was it because of the beard? No, it was because you turned into an asshole when you forced her to sit through a movie that gave her nightmares even after she protested. The beard was just icing on that particular cake....

Basically, you are advising people to be the biggest A-hole in history, and see if someone sticks around in order to prove they really like you for you... yet through all this A-hole stuff, are you really being yourself? Or are you changing who you are in order to "test" someone's feelings?

iF you are a real a-hole, this will work great because you are showing her early on that you have no regard for anyone but yourself, however, if this is not who you are, and you want to be liked for who you really are, then just be yourself. From the get go. No need to try and push people away, when you do that, you are likely to find yourself alone, while these women go on to have wonderful marriages/relationships with other men, ones who were themselves from the get go.

And you would probably be amazed to find out that the girl on the date with the beard, married someone who did not have one, simply because he was a kind and good man.

reply to post by TrueBrit


My husband is the same way, he cannot stand women to wear make-up. He told me this before we ever met, so I do avoid wearing it most the time since he thinks its more attractive without.

Maybe the next women you meet you might tell her that you enjoy the natural look.

Women want to be attractive to who they are with! Whether its with make-up or without it, we just want you to think we are beautiful!

reply to post by OpinionatedB


If she doesn't like that I listen to metal then at some point she is going to have to accept that I listen to metal or leave.

I'd rather it get done in a hurry then suck me into some drama trash reality show b/s.

Catch my drift?

Do I need to explain further?

Garlic keeps the vampires away!

Do women prey on the mentally weak or mentally retarded? heres what I mean:

Women do just about everything I said that needs to be done at the beginning of the relationship barring circumstance and situations.

It depends on the likes and dislikes your dealing with.

Now if they knew a group of men knew ho they worked. And in the next room was a same number of men who didn't understand women or try to they just went with the flow and let her run there life like a puppet master and potentially getting cheat on with a man in room #1 because the man in room #2 just isn't good enough except to buffalo control and run games on.

Yet the man in room #1 was good enough for the night.

Now Isn't it safe to say that a man with intel and knows your game and plays your game make you realize just where your at with yourself and since this makes for a BIG look in the mirror women become predators on those mentally on a smaller scale?

The whole control thing and what not stems from women are naturally born to mother. To emotionally nurture someone and they are geared to be in every aspect of there childs life.

As nature has made the males geared toward spreading his seed to ensure survival of his gene pool.

Women are taught that they excel at maturing faster then men. This causes women to want to mother there significant others. This is why alot of times she will worry herself to death over her loved one. A lot of time unknowingly this si what is causing problems int he relationship.

She is trying to mother you! You are playing the rebellious child!

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX


If you like metal music this is generally something she will know before the first date.

She doesn't have to like your music, and you don't have to like hers. What you have to do is respect the other person.

Case in point, my husband loves his rock music. I have always known he does, from day one. If I am not in the mood to listen to his music and he is, then he puts headphones on. It's great that way, he listens to what he wants as loud as he likes, and I am having my pleasant quiet night, yet we are curled up together enjoying one another.... Just being close.

Because I love and respect him, there are times I don't mind it for him to play his music on the computer loudly, and sometimes I will encourage him to this end because I know he enjoys it this way too. It's not all the time, but it is sometimes.

This is him respecting me, and me respecting him. Relationships are about 2 people, and learning to work together, and respecting each other, regardless of likes and dislikes, because no two people are the same.

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX

If she doesn't like that I listen to metal then at some point she is going to have to accept that I listen to metal or leave. I'd rather it get done in a hurry then suck me into some drama trash reality show b/s. Catch my drift? Do I need to explain further?

Like the song says, “You Can’t Hurry Love”.

You don’t need to explain any further. People are trying to tell you that your approach won’t work. Your theory for how to find love is nothing but manipulation and control. Your set-up is just games. I can always tell when a man is trying to manipulate and control me. That is the only red flag I need to call it off.

I have dated many men like you. They do not give a relationship time to develop. Everything is “right now”. It doesn’t work. Be realistic. If you don’t have the time to give to a relationship to let it grow and develop, then don’t bother. Have you ever planted a garden? Do you plant one day and harvest it the next?

reply to post by hellnotes


You just proved my point you took nothing from what I have said!

The whole point is not control the point is make sure she sees eye to eye on 2 way streets.

Here let me explain lets say I have to wear polo and I like band tees well eventually I'm going to throw the polos in the corner for awhile. So I better wear my band tees predominately at first cause if shes just dating the polos i'm out.

And if she's just making me into the man that failed or she couldn't get i'm out.

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX


Yet your not speaking about having any two way streets.

Your constantly saying, I. You come across as: If she doesn't like MY music, then I will show her, if she likes my beard, then I will show her. You sound more like a control freak than someone who wants to have a relationship with someone!

Relationships aren't about being the same person, its learning to be two people together, celebrating differences.

PS. No one dates you because of what you wear, they date you for who you are, inside. If you have a nothing on the inside, then they wont want a second date. People who lack anything inside of them, do what you do, drive everyone away... because they know they aren't worth having, and they don't try to be.

reply to post by OpinionatedB


You read it how you want to read it. Go back to the origin of the whole topic my op.

The point is to get inevitability out of the way.

She thinks he loves her. Cut your hair off!

That way on down the road you ain't fighting and fussing because someone didn't remember and anniversary.

Because that is what women do anyway in so many ways.

A man figures you out and does it back whats the first thing you turn to?

He's trying to control me and yet the whole GD time your doing the samething.

Your not going to lecture me and tell me anything. Because I compromise and put my women first but heres the thing. I'm not your puppet on a string.

This man will be the man he is. And that's why the women who was fair about the chances I got love me. Because they never had to change either.

We just meet in the middle.

If you can't take your own medicine please for the love of god don't dish it out because someone is gonna serve it to you.

And women of all people are the last people that can handle there own b/s.

Why? Because everyone else spoils them and makes sure they go to bed ignorant at night believing they were right when they were wrong just because no one wants to put up with abunch of dumb drama.

Now think about that one before you go to bed.

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX


My husband loves my long hair, I love my long hair (its why I have it) so why in the hell would I cut it off? That's insane!

I don't need to "test" my husband's love for me, I know for a fact that he does. When I am sick or in too much pain he will get my medicine for me, help me to the bathroom if I need help, and be by my side through all the bad. I know this, because I have seen it with my own eyes.

If I want to keep things interesting in the future, I am going to spend my time finding out all the things he likes, and do them sporadically just to make him happy. He thinks thigh highs and garters are sexy? I am going out to buy some and have them on hand so I can surprise him occasionally.

He likes coffee in bed every morning? I am going to wake up earlier than him just to have the coffee made and ready to hand him when its time for him to get up.

He thinks my long hair is beautiful? I am going to keep it, because this was the way I was when he met me, and something he likes about me.

Same goes for him, he does things to make me happy... buys me that chocolate bar on his way home because he knows I like them, he helps take out the trash when I ask because he knows I work too.

We do things for each other, to make each other happy, and respect each other. Respect is a two way street, not a one way street. Life isn't about driving people away, its about keeping the good and worthy ones close.

reply to post by OpinionatedB


Your right and I'm wrong!

Good night!

reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX

Here let me explain lets say I have to wear polo and I like band tees well eventually I'm going to throw the polos in the corner for awhile. So I better wear my band tees predominately at first cause if shes just dating the polos i'm out. And if she's just making me into the man that failed or she couldn't get i'm out.

You’ll figure it out. You can go through all your lists of band tees and polos and beards and shaved heads and everything else you think is important in a relationship and you still won’t be able to cover everything. Life is too complicated and humans are too complicated. There are too many variables. And people change over time. And relationships change over time. Relationships are a risk and that’s just the way it is. You’ll figure it out…

OpinionatedB
reply to post by XsweetNspiceyX

 

My husband loves my long hair, I love my long hair (its why I have it) so why in the hell would I cut it off? That's insane!

edit on 8-2-2014 by OpinionatedB because: (no reason given)

It's a test to see if he truly loves you for who you are, not what you are or how you look. The entire point of the OP was to get those sort things out of the way ASAP-a-roony.

reply to post by kimish


If someone stays with you when you cut off your hair in no way mean they have what it takes to stand by your side through cancer, which is one thing that makes your hair fall out. I promise you that!