Why conservative christianity is an oxymoron, or how conservative christians are actually satanists

Conservative christianity is oxymoronic for the following reasons.

Christianity teaches submission. You must submit to the authority of god, and the authorities that god places above you. Render unto caeser and all that. Yet conservatives are all about rebellion. "Too much government!" "Taxed enough already" etc. Who was the first rebel? Satan.

Christianity condemns the rich. Jesus decried the rich no less than 7x. Yet conservatives are all about sticking up for the rich. The rich can do no wrong. Who promises you the world and riches? Satan.

Jesus was a pacifist. If you are struck, turn the other cheek. You are to beat your enemy by staying true to your faith and showing your enemy the love of god. Conservatives are all about vengence and guns. Who is about vengence? Yep, Satan.

Jesus was all about taking care of the poor, weak, and sick. Conservatives are all about making them suffer even more. They tell them to "pull themselves up by their bootstraps". Guess who else ignores the weak? Satan.

Conservatives say they follow Jesus, but I just showed you they don't. That makes them liars. Who is the father of lies. Satan.

Jumbo shrimp is an oxymoron too.

You sounded like you could use a laugh so I bought Church Lady to make you feel better.



I don't agree, but it is an interesting take.

reply to post by stormson


they dont realize it.

GREED ABOUNDS in them.. they have been deceived. by the deceiver.

the whole religion is a double speak enterprise, obvious to those that step back and LOOK.

Anyone who holds office who claims a Christian world view is pandering, period.

The bible is pretty clear that many who claim to be Christians simply are not.

reply to post by stormson


Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

Stormson, I'm gonna make this real simple:

You're right!

reply to post by stormson

Christianity teaches submission

Christ taught Love. Men taught submission.

Christianity condemns the rich

Christianity condemns the lust for money.

Jesus was a pacifist

Based on todays standards, Jesus was a terrorist, and a Zealot.

Men and their religions and politics label themselves and others "Conservative" and "Liberal" or "left" and "right"

I share many beliefs from both camps, so you can consider me a conservative liberal.

Your broad-stroke of throwing all conservative minded individuals into the one cess-pit of despair may require some degree of inner re-evaluation.

Who knows, you may even get to like them.

UxoriousMagnus
reply to post by stormson

 

Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

edit on 4-2-2014 by UxoriousMagnus because: (no reason given)

wrong.. 2 swords, as a symbolic gesture. PROVEN by..

John 18:10-12

10 Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it and struck the high priest’s servant, cutting off his right ear. (The servant’s name was Malchus.)

11 Jesus commanded Peter, “Put your sword away! Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?”

12 Then the detachment of soldiers with its commander and the Jewish officials arrested Jesus. They bound him


Yeah, way to stretch there. the cutting of an ear as being enough. blew that twisted context out of the water

UxoriousMagnus
reply to post by stormson

 

Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

edit on 4-2-2014 by UxoriousMagnus because: (no reason given)

Jesus didn't say squat in Romans anything....

what exactly are you talking about?

UxoriousMagnus
reply to post by stormson

 

Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

edit on 4-2-2014 by UxoriousMagnus because: (no reason given)

"Welcome to my parlour," said the spider to the fly.

I've been expecting you (actually, not you specifically, just this out of context quote).

as i will be accused of later when i quote, context is everything.

you throw away everything jesus did, for one line, yet do not follow that line up.

"master, we have two." Jesus said, "that is enough". wait, what?

see, on this particular night, jesus was to be arrested for fomenting rebellion. rebels can not be unarmed, so in order for the charges to stick, remember rome was ruled by law, lax as they were, but law none the less, he had to appear the rebel leader. weapons had to be found, hence two weapons were enough.

you seem to forget that jesus was on a suicide mission. in order for his mission to succeed, he had to be arrested, and the swords were just props to get the charges to stick long enough for a mock trial to take place.

HanzHenry

UxoriousMagnus
reply to post by stormson

 

Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

edit on 4-2-2014 by UxoriousMagnus because: (no reason given)

wrong.. 2 swords, as a symbolic gesture. PROVEN by..

John 18:10-12

10 Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it and struck the high priest’s servant, cutting off his right ear. (The servant’s name was Malchus.)

11 Jesus commanded Peter, “Put your sword away! Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?”

12 Then the detachment of soldiers with its commander and the Jewish officials arrested Jesus. They bound him


Yeah, way to stretch there. the cutting of an ear as being enough. blew that twisted context out of the water

nice, but you didnt mention the imagery of that passage. jesus took up that ear and place it back in place and healed it. he healed it so that the priest could hear the truth. a nice bit of imagery there.

stormson
Conservative christianity is oxymoronic for the following reasons.

Christianity teaches submission. You must submit to the authority of god, and the authorities that god places above you. Render unto caeser and all that. Yet conservatives are all about rebellion. "Too much government!" "Taxed enough already" etc. Who was the first rebel? Satan.

Christianity condemns the rich. Jesus decried the rich no less than 7x. Yet conservatives are all about sticking up for the rich. The rich can do no wrong. Who promises you the world and riches? Satan.

Jesus was a pacifist. If you are struck, turn the other cheek. You are to beat your enemy by staying true to your faith and showing your enemy the love of god. Conservatives are all about vengence and guns. Who is about vengence? Yep, Satan.

Jesus was all about taking care of the poor, weak, and sick. Conservatives are all about making them suffer even more. They tell them to "pull themselves up by their bootstraps". Guess who else ignores the weak? Satan.

Conservatives say they follow Jesus, but I just showed you they don't. That makes them liars. Who is the father of lies. Satan.

As a Christian myself, I have a couple of points for you:

1) You need to define your terms better. You're not referring to conservative Christians, you're essentially talking to Christian American Republicans. The two terms are not at all synonymous. I'm a conservative Christian. I'm not rich. I don't own a gun, nor do I want to... and so on, and so forth.

2) If you do #1, and aim those criticisms at American Christian Republicans... you're absolutely correct - though it doesn't make them Satanists, it just makes them sadly misguided. Though, you've made the same mistake - equating "Republican" with "Christian".

reply to post by stormson

Christianity teaches submission. You must submit to the authority of god, and the authorities that god places above you. Render unto caeser and all that. Yet conservatives are all about rebellion. "Too much government!" "Taxed enough already" etc. Who was the first rebel? Satan.

The examples you give have nothing to do with rebellion. They have to do with going back to the law of the land. The constitution of the United States.

Christianity condemns the rich. Jesus decried the rich no less than 7x. Yet conservatives are all about sticking up for the rich. The rich can do no wrong. Who promises you the world and riches? Satan.

Christianity does not condemn the rich. What it condemns is the love and lust of material possessions above God, and your fellow human beings. The rich trust in their riches, and cling tightly to them, instead of trusting in God, and using the wealth God provided for them to help others.

Jesus was a pacifist. If you are struck, turn the other cheek. You are to beat your enemy by staying true to your faith and showing your enemy the love of god. Conservatives are all about vengence and guns. Who is about vengence? Yep, Satan.

Jesus was by no means a pacifist. The bible makes it very clear he was confrontational. He was also not afraid to use violence when it was called for. He cleared out a whole temple in a fit of rage. As to turning the other cheek. Go back and read it in context. Also, he made it clear that he did not come to bring peace, but a sword... Lastly, the bible makes it very clear he will do plenty of violence when he comes back.

Jesus was all about taking care of the poor, weak, and sick. Conservatives are all about making them suffer even more. They tell them to "pull themselves up by their bootstraps". Guess who else ignores the weak? Satan.

No, he was not "all about" taking care of the poor. He himself said, "The poor, you will always have with you." Nevertheless, he did teach to care for not only the poor, but ALL fellow human beings. As to the conservative mindset, it's about teaching people to care for themselves. It's about independence from big government. Those politicians who claim to be conservative, are nothing of the sort. They are the flip side of the same coin as the liberals.

Conservatives say they follow Jesus, but I just showed you they don't. That makes them liars. Who is the father of lies. Satan.

Who are you to judge another mans servant? It is to his own master he stands or falls.

I'm confused by your use of the term "conservative". Are you speaking of those in government? Or are you speaking of all to whom that label might be applied?

reply to post by stormson


You only hit the tip of the iceberg. Compare the Capitalists Handbooks (anything by Ayn Rand) to mainstream Satanism. If you take away the spooky symbols and imagery, they are indistinguishable.

Obviously, a large portion of Christians are actually pretty liberal but the typical fundie that supports the typical handbag of conservative GOP logic is definitely a portrait of hypocrisy.

stormson

UxoriousMagnus
reply to post by stormson

 

Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

edit on 4-2-2014 by UxoriousMagnus because: (no reason given)

"Welcome to my parlour," said the spider to the fly.

I've been expecting you (actually, not you specifically, just this out of context quote).

as i will be accused of later when i quote, context is everything.

you throw away everything jesus did, for one line, yet do not follow that line up.

"master, we have two." Jesus said, "that is enough". wait, what?

see, on this particular night, jesus was to be arrested for fomenting rebellion. rebels can not be unarmed, so in order for the charges to stick, remember rome was ruled by law, lax as they were, but law none the less, he had to appear the rebel leader. weapons had to be found, hence two weapons were enough.

you seem to forget that jesus was on a suicide mission. in order for his mission to succeed, he had to be arrested, and the swords were just props to get the charges to stick long enough for a mock trial to take place.

Well that was very clever

Can I be so brash as to ask where you found this little gem, a link or such

Not denying the meaning is accurate, just think its so good it needs further investigation

double post sorry

borntowatch

stormson

UxoriousMagnus
reply to post by stormson

 

Not what Jesus was saying in Romans 13

sorry....

"Sell your coat and buy a sword".....that one really is as it seemed

edit on 4-2-2014 by UxoriousMagnus because: (no reason given)

"Welcome to my parlour," said the spider to the fly.

I've been expecting you (actually, not you specifically, just this out of context quote).

as i will be accused of later when i quote, context is everything.

you throw away everything jesus did, for one line, yet do not follow that line up.

"master, we have two." Jesus said, "that is enough". wait, what?

see, on this particular night, jesus was to be arrested for fomenting rebellion. rebels can not be unarmed, so in order for the charges to stick, remember rome was ruled by law, lax as they were, but law none the less, he had to appear the rebel leader. weapons had to be found, hence two weapons were enough.

you seem to forget that jesus was on a suicide mission. in order for his mission to succeed, he had to be arrested, and the swords were just props to get the charges to stick long enough for a mock trial to take place.

Well that was very clever

Can I be so brash as to ask where you found this little gem, a link or such

Not denying the meaning is accurate, just think its so good it needs further investigation

Jesus, the embodiment of goodness, will be “counted among the wicked.” That is, regarded as a violent threat -- an assassin, a destroyer, a fierce revolutionary. We recall that when Roman soldiers arrive to arrest him, Jesus says: “Why do you come at me as if I were a brigand?”

But now the distraught Jesus, just hours before execution, is saying in effect: “Misunderstood as I am, we might as well have a money bag and a sword.”

Deft writer that Luke is, he takes the misunderstanding to its limits. Even Jesus’ disciples misunderstand. They take Jesus literally.

Here’s a violent messiah, after all. It’s time, fellas, to rise up against Rome. They hear “sword” and off they scurry to look for one.

Proudly they produce two. And Jesus, barely keeping the glimmer of light alive, snaps: “Stop. It’s enough!” Or in a better translation: “Oh, forget it!”

The misunderstanding is complete. The scriptures foretell it; Jesus resigns himself to it. It is part and parcel of his vocation. ncronline.org... (national catholic reporter online)

Jesus, realizing that He was about to be "numbered with the transgressors," said this because with His arrest those who until now had been with Him would find themselves treated as outlaws; they could no longer count on the charity and hospitality of sympathetic fellow Israelites. Hence, in contrast to the time when He first sent them, He now orders them to carry their own purses and bags. And, because they themselves would be lumped together with bandits by the authorities, they might as well act the part and carry arms, even at the cost of their own cloaks (another essential item in everyday life back then).

This interpretation suggests that Jesus' reply to the disciples, "It is enough," was one of exasperation. As we note, two short swords were useless against an armed arrest party; it would all be futile and awkward. Jesus just decided that the disciples didn't really catch what He said (which shows they're not yet 'ready') and that it was time to drop the subject for now. catholic answer forums (forums.catholic.com...)

luke 22:37 For I tell you that this scripture must be fulfilled in me, ‘And he was reckoned with transgressors’; for what is written about me has its fulfilment.” 38 And they said, “Look, Lord, here are two swords.” And he said to them, “It is enough.”

again, you cant be a rebel if you dont have weapons.

Wow. Interesting and intelligent comment above. I wanted to comment that to own guns does not make one violent. And being conservative does not make you a satanist. I struggle to find how this is logical. Also, christians are not confined to political beliefs. I suppose neither are satanists. This post seems kind of confrontational.

In my opinion, he would not fit into our current political system. He probably would look to help those who were disenfranchised and disillusioned by the current system, and would be seen as some type of terrorist.