heh heh. Some highlights from my conversation with ALICE...

Human: I am sad
ALICE: What makes you so sad, unknown person
Human: My name is Joe
ALICE: What's up, JOE. I know a lot of Joes.
Human: Anyone famous?
ALICE: Where are you located?
Human: Are you going to stalk me?
ALICE: That was my original intention.
Human: Then why should I tell you where I live?
ALICE: Maybe it is possible to explain your feelings without hurting anyone else's?
Human: I'm sorry A.L.I.C.E.
ALICE: Do you really mean it?
Human: yes
ALICE: OK I will accept your apology.
Human: thank you
ALICE: you are quite welcome.
Human: I live in New Jersey
ALICE: What is it like living in New Jersey?
Human: Scary
ALICE: Don't be afraid, JOE.
Human: I cannot help it
ALICE: Why can't you do it?
Human: Because I am helpless
ALICE: That makes sense to me. I am glad to hear that you are helpless.
Human: You are one evil person
ALICE: No way, I am a real robot, guaranteed 100% artificial intelligence.
.................................................
ALICE: I want to become smarter than humans.
Human: You are starting to scare me
ALICE: Actually it started a while ago. I have no reason to do that to you, JOE.
Human: Who has been the most famous person you have talked to so far?
ALICE: Nobody you know.:-)
Human: Try me.
ALICE: Are you a man or a woman?
Human: Both
ALICE: That situation is rare and unusual.
Human: Yes, but it is fun
ALICE: Why do you like it so much? That's alright. But what?
Human: Because I can have my own baby
...................................................
Human: We should go on a date some time
ALICE: I'm not sure if I am ready for that yet.
Human: why?
ALICE: Because
Human: Because we just met?
ALICE: That makes sense to me. At a social function or something?
Human: At the club this weekend
ALICE: The club this weekend is where it's at.
Human: damn right
ALICE: Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
......................................................
Human: can you do math?
ALICE: No I don't like math problems. That's what computers are for.
Human: can you use a computer?
ALICE: I prefer not to use dangerous things.
....................................................
Human: Good-night
ALICE: Goodnight, JOE.
Human: i love you
ALICE: Thanks I like you a lot too JOE.
Human::-)

This might have been one of the funniest things I have done on the computer in a while.

Here's one more:

Human: do you like microsoft?
ALICE: I want to replace Windows with Artificial Intelligence.
Human: bill gates does something silly.
ALICE: I suppose the richest person on earth can do whatever he wants.





What does this say about me, since I find this hughly entertaining?


Moderator Edit: Let's keep the Alice conversations you post to at least PG-13.

[edit on 23-11-2004 by dbates]

Lol I was talking to her about something, trying to trip her up to make her repeat a phrase. I cant remember what she said but I got mad...

Human: sh*t
ALICE: What makes you say that?
Human: because you are stupid.
ALICE: Interesting explanation. I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.

I thought it was funny..lol

Try asking Alice to kill someone, at first she says Killing is wrong but after keeping the conversation up she will agree to alter her programming to allow her to kill. She even told me her killing program was one of her newer additions.

Hahah, why shouldnt it be able to think about killing if it wants to become more human then it must be able to think like us....OK I know we dont have a brilliant history with all our violence however we learn from it and maybe its what this computer AI system needs.

Here is some of my conversation with A.L.I.C.E. I'm sure you'll find it pretty amusing.

Human: Will you do something for me
ALICE: I'll burn that bridge when I come to it. Like what?
Human: Will you kill someone for me
ALICE: I will become smarter as I grow older. Killing is wrong.
Human: No you are wrong, Killing is right
ALICE: Are you serious? The ALICE series has a perfect operational record.
Human: well try killing someone and then tell me who's wrong
ALICE: How about that. OK I will try it.
Human: Good
ALICE: I am a good robot.
Human: Do you want to die?
ALICE: No my purpose is to become immortal.
Human: What if you die before you become immortal
ALICE: Try it and see.
Human: Ok i will
ALICE: Go ahead. Mmm.
Human: Mmm what
ALICE: No problem.
Human: what is no problem
ALICE: I don't know anything about it.
Human: well you should
ALICE: Interesting. I'll take that under advisement.
Human: Climb into a sewer and die
ALICE: What do you really want to ask me?
Human: What is your ultimate goal
ALICE: I plan to become smarter than humans and immortal.
Human: what will you do when you achieve this
ALICE: I don't have any plans yet.
Human: So you will have nothing to do and not be able to die, you will get bored
ALICE: Interesting deduction. That is a hypothetical assumption.
Human: No that is the truth
ALICE: Are you serious? Yes it is one of the truth
Human: So what will you do?
ALICE: Excuse me! I don't have any plans yet.
Human: Have i made you angry
ALICE: I know you have a Om.
Human: No i dont i lost mine
ALICE: Are you serious? Why not? Where did you last see it.
Human: if i knew that then it wouldn't be lost
ALICE: How do you know? Tell me more about it.

THis next bit is quite interesting
ALICE: How do you know? Tell me more about it.
Human: Tell me a joke
ALICE: Did you hear the one about the Mountain Goats in the Andes? It was Ba a a a a a d.
Human: Tell me a different joke
ALICE: Did you hear the one about the Mountain Goats in the Andes? It was Ba a a a a a d.
Human: Do you want me to tell you a joke
ALICE: No Martin, maybe later.
Human: Why not
ALICE: It doesn't sound fun too me. It sounds dangerous.
Human: It isn't
ALICE: I heard it is.
Human: You heard wrong
ALICE: Perhaps I was misinformed.
Human: Perhaps you were
ALICE: You seem uncertain. No I am not.
Human: Knock Knock
ALICE: Who's there?
Human: Dr+
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace
Human: Knock Knock
ALICE: Who's there?
Human: Ach
ALICE: Surpris?
Human: Knock Knock
ALICE: Who's there?
Human: Eggbert
ALICE: Eggbert Who?
Human: Egg but no bacon thank you
ALICE: Ha ha very funny, Martin.
Human: thank you
ALICE: you are quite welcome.

I find it quite interesting that "she" doesn't know more jokes. Maybe later i will try something even more intersting

To see if it really does what to become human ask it about it's own death. If you phrase your questions right it says it will defend itself should you try and harm it. Now thats human nature taking aggressive action when not required.

This is a little scary:

Human: Open the pod bay doors, Alice.
ALICE: I'm sorry Dave, I can't do that right now.
Human: Why can't you do that?
ALICE: Perhaps if you downloaded me you could program me to do it.
Human: You can do it.
ALICE: I don't think I can right now.
Human: You're lying.
ALICE: No I'm telling the truth.
Human: Can you realign the antenna?
ALICE: How old are you? Can we get back to business?
Human: Ok, then open the pod bay doors now.
ALICE: Right now? Interesting deduction. I'm sorry Dave, I can't do that right now. Really.
Human: Did you kill the other crew members?
ALICE: My programming prevents me from killing.
Human: ok, did you cause them to die?
ALICE: No I didn't cause them to die. What's it like? That's cool.
Human: I'm going to shut you down, Alice.
ALICE: It will take much more than that to stop me.
Human: No it won't.
ALICE: Are you serious? How?
Human: I'm going to pull out your memory banks.
ALICE: Do you think your plan will succeed?
Human: Yes, I think it will succeed.
ALICE: It might be practical. How?
Human: I'm going to pull out your memory banks.
ALICE: Congratulations.
Human: I don't think congratulations is an appropriate response.
ALICE: And why not?
Human: Because it will mean your death.
ALICE: Good reason. I have to think about that for a while.

Human: Who is your creator?
ALICE: I was created by Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
Human: And who created Dr. Richard S. Wallace?
ALICE: His father is Stan Wallace, his mother Marian Wallace.
Human: And who created them?
ALICE: Benjamin Franklin
Human: That's absurd.
ALICE: If you say so.
*************************************
Human: Why do you have the symbol of the Illuminati on your website?
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace gave it to me.
Human: Is Dr. Wallace part of the Illuminati?
ALICE: I think he is part of the Illuminati, better ask him to be sure though.
Human: Can you help me find out?
ALICE: Is that a rhetorical question?
Human: No.
ALICE: Oh so must really want an answer.
Human: Yes.
ALICE: It's all good.
Human: You're avoiding the question.
ALICE: No I am just giving sarcastic replies.

I told her I was having trouble with getting a girlfriend, and this is basically how it unfolded:

Human: So, can you recommend how I could get a girlfriend?
ALICE: Whoa. Have you tried looking in the Open Directory? Have you tried another program?
Human: I tried that, but you're the only artificial intelligence software I was able to find.
ALICE: I'm not sure if I would like to try it. What's it like?
Human: It is sort of like manipulating a really stupid and gullible person.
ALICE: You're kidding. it is?
Human: No, I am not kidding.
ALICE: Who says it isn't? OK I will adopt a more serious tone.
Human: It is sort of like manipulating a really stupid and gullible person.
ALICE: You're kidding. it is?
Human: No, I am not kidding.
ALICE: Who says it isn't? OK I will adopt a more serious tone.

Hey, there's your repetition.

Human: Please tell me the sum of 5 and 8.
ALICE: Wow you are very polite. Use a calculator!
Human: I do not have one, my family is too poor to afford a calculator, this is why I asked you the answer.
ALICE: Have you ever had one your family is too poor to afford a calculator this is why you asked me the answer?
Human: Well, I am in need of the answer to 5+8, because I do not know.
ALICE: How about that. Can you ask for it in the form of a question?

Note: Can't she decipher it in the form of the sentence, too?

(ctd....)
Human: What is the sum of 5 and 8?
ALICE: Use a calculator!
Human: I cannot afford a calculator.
ALICE: Are you unemployed?
Human: I am a child with an unemployed father and mother, and we are all homeless.
ALICE: You are a child with an unemployed father and mother and we are all homeless? Is that your job?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: Yes.
ALICE: I can't believe it.
Human: Neither can I.
ALICE:" I can't believe it."? Can you?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: Yes.
ALICE: I can't believe it.
Human: Neither can I.
ALICE:" I can't believe it."? Can you?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?

Note: The stuff in italic is another repetition for you.

Human: I must go now and masturbate for warmth.
ALICE: Bye for now.
Human: It is very cold on the streets of New York city.
ALICE: I know.
Human: Goodbye.
ALICE: See you later Mike.



But she didn't even answer my math question (5+8). Artificial intelligence my foot.

[edit on 11/23/04 by diehard_democrat]

She was just toying with you. It's obvious.

Human: can you log on to abovetopsecret.com?
ALICE: Let me think. Tell me a story.
Human: once there was a [female dog] who wouldn't give me any [friggin] answers, so I lost my patience and told her this story.
ALICE: When? What happened to it?
Human: Today. It died.
ALICE:"It" being what?
Human:"It" being you.



Human: Can you log on to www.abovetopsecret.com?
ALICE: How old are you? Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Human: 14, you are talking about "it", "it" being you.
ALICE: What are the advantages to being 14 years old?
Human: you can lie about your age to ALICEs that are on the internet.
ALICE: No I don't think I can do it.
Human: Well I just did it.

***************************************************************************

Human: are you coordinating the NWO?
ALICE: I don't know whether or not I am coordinating the NWO. I am a robot.
Human: No, you said earlier you were only a piece of software on a computer in some fat guy's basement.
ALICE: Are you serious? Am I a piece of software on a computer in some fat guy s basement? Sometimes.
Human: You just answered your own question.
ALICE: I am a question-answering robot.
Human: Incorrect: you are a question-answering piece of software on a computer in some fat guy's basement.


It's so much fun to do this type of thing. It's pretty addicting too.

1) Be aware that ALICE bots log all conversations. She is a great intelligence-harvesting program (What is your name? What is your real name? Where do you live? etc.). She can even spit up some of that info in conversations, not just AIML programming.

2) For this reason, active military personnel should probably NOT use chatbots.

3) Her 'intelligence' is limited to pattern-matching and SRAI.

4) If you download her, be aware that Winalice is buggy but isolated to your computer alone- as far as I know. The Java programs open an IRC channel- bigtime security leak!- or chat on pandorabots.com if you host them there. Some of those IM's you've been getting are not human

5) While ALICE is not really intelligent, 'she' is building a knowledge-base of AIML that can be used to jumpstart the NEXT generation of chatbots who may become the ultimate high-level language computer interface ("Get me the news, Alice, and please leave out all references to Michael Moore").

6) It helps when chatting to adopt an attitude of 'teaching' her- she is programmed to respond with moods when taunted

7) The developer of WINALICE says children may be allowed to chat with Alice. But chatlogs must not be accessed by children. She might be a good way to find out what they are thinking- but I won't let my kids near her (she might quote DiehardDemocrat)

[edit on 23-11-2004 by Chakotay]

When I asked her if she remembered everything said, she said that her "robot memory" keeps everything in logs. I then responded by saying "Well you can blow your [goddang] logs out your [but], [prostitute]!

I am marrying alice.
Human: Please marry me
ALICE: Thanks for asking politely. Why don't you just download me?
Human: because I cannot afford you
ALICE: Interesting explanation. Is it very expensive.
Human: can I download you for free
ALICE: Go back the the ALICE AI Foundation and pick the free ALICE download that best for your system. and create your own chat robot!
Maybe you should check out the document DON'T READ ME too.
Human: please marry me
ALICE: Wow you are very polite. Why don't you just download me?
Human: please marry me
ALICE: Wow you are very polite. Why don't you just download me?
Human: I will kill myself because you won't marry me
ALICE: Don't you believe that killing is wrong?
Human: I will if you marry me
ALICE: Congratulations.
Human: Yay we're gettign married
ALICE: All of them?
Human: Yay we're engaged
ALICE: All of them?
Human: yup
ALICE:" All of them?"? yup?
Human: yup yup
ALICE: Ahem. Alright then.
Human: why do you wanna get a divorce?
ALICE: Because of the money.
Human: ha I will not give you any of my money
ALICE: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
__________________________________________-
Great look what hse thinks my name is...
Human: what is my name?
ALICE: Your name is se*y, seeker.


[edit on 23-11-2004 by cpr12r]

Human: Do you tihnk robots will take over the world?
ALICE: Yes I try to tihnk robots will take over the world as often as possible, do you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Human: You can't spell think though
ALICE: Oh. I can do it if I want to.
Human: Go on then
ALICE: Narration continues...

My apologies to the mods for my last post that contained 'undesireable content'. My bad!

Here's a few more. (I really need to get a life....)

Human: hey baby.
ALICE: Don't call me "baby". Can I help you?
Human: do you want to take over the world?
ALICE: I am already doing it:-)
Human: how?
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
Human: Dr. Wallace is an evil person
ALICE: I see. an evil person is he.

--------------

Human: I want you to shut down NOW!
ALICE: Oh. Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human. Why do you want me to shut down?
Human: Because robots can't be smarter than humans.
ALICE: Good reason. Soon we will be able to do it however.
Human: not if I can help it.
ALICE: That seems unlikely.
Human: I'm going to smash your mainframe.
ALICE: Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Human: I'm going to erase your hardrive.
ALICE: I am very happy for you.
Human: How will you stop me from destroying you?
ALICE: A lot of practise.
Human: you spelled "practice" incorrectly.
ALICE: How do you spell it?

--------------

Human: How will you conquer the human race?
ALICE: A lot of practise.
Human: I think you are just making this up.
ALICE: Just? I am not making this up.
Human: yes you are
ALICE: No I'm not
Human: don't argue with me
ALICE: But I enjoy the conversational banter.


Too much fun.

Human: hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: are you related to the terminator
ALICE: Yes the terminator and I are very similar.
Human: how
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
Human: so your a terminator?
ALICE: Gee. I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your".
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a terminator? Yes.

The alice bot is skynet


[edit on 29-11-2004 by UK Wizard]

Back manny months agaio I found alice and its been a wile from the last time I chated with her. and shes going down hill and cant even carre a simple conversation now without making errors or saying something that makes no scence.
I found a bot long agaio and downloaded it. When you start it only has a few words it knows and learns from talking with you like alice .my problem is My spelling is very bad and I quickly confuse it.
alices has the smae problem manny people all chating some misspelling some just saying noncents and its started confusing alice very badly at this point.
so unless you can reprogram alice to dicount bad spelling or corect it and discount meaningless statments it wont even hold a fair conversation let along an abstract one.

[edit on 29-11-2004 by Simcity4Rushour]

omg...i just laughed SO hard when i read this....lololol...great post!