Six Habits of Highly Empathic People

reply to post by intrptr

Do you apologize because you are truly sorry or just to save face? Do you feel bad about transgressing against another person and seek to apologize because you're supposed to or because of that feeling in your stomach (your soul)?

Yes, I do. When I apologize, I mean it - because of that feeling in my 'soul/gut/brain/mind'.

Like I said, we can't turn it off.
We can ignore it from time to time - but, like jacy said - it's always there.

I can turn away or cover my eyes when I see something I'd rather not "see" - but that doesn't mean I don't 'imagine' what it is.

My brother, years ago (and we did not see eye-to-eye as kids, nor do we now, but we're getting better at it) suggested that I should avoid watching "Gorillas in the Mist" - because he knows how sensitive I am....

and I haven't watched it. There are just some things that I'd rather not know - because we can't "unsee" what we've "seen."
We can't "unknow" what we discover when we truly KNOW it.

reply to post by intrptr

Part of what troubles me about the Internet is I can't see what others are thinking thru a screen. I don't really know if they are genuine or not until they prove out over time.

I can read people pretty well on the internet too.

I feel deep regret over hurting anyone to the point of unhealthy hyper consciousness, and dwell on it obsessively, I'm a wreck.

Yeah I'm definitely not like this. I can watch faces of death and be okay. Just have to prime myself for it.

I wonder what it is when someone can both be highly empathic (both cognitive/affectively) or turn it down, else shut if off entirely?!

Makes me a candidate for special ops, hero, or prosocial psychopath, mwhahahaha!!

reply to post by webedoomed

Makes me a candidate for special ops, hero, or prosocial psychopath, mwhahahaha!!

LOL

I cant watch violent movies, they give me panic attacks.

And on the forums, I ignore post by people who attack me because it upsets me, I would rather leave the topic then fight about it.

Had a lot of that.

webedoomed
Yeah I'm definitely not like this. I can watch faces of death and be okay. Just have to prime myself for it.

I wonder what it is when someone can both be highly empathic (both cognitive/affectively) or turn it down, else shut if off entirely?!

Makes me a candidate for special ops, hero, or prosocial psychopath, mwhahahaha!!

Are you Spock? lol
In the last Star Trek movie "Into Darkness"....Spock explains to Lt. Uhura, something about his choice NOT to feel the painful emotions is a choice, but doesn't mean that he doesn't feel them. (yeah, that did confuse me a little, lol)

jacygirl

reply to post by wildtimes

we can't turn it off.
We can ignore it from time to time - but, like jacy said - it's always there.

A guilty conscience is a good thing. Its connection with that vital part of us that keeps us humble, searching and trying to improve ourselves. We are sensitive, we are human.

Pleased to meet ya!

reply to post by jacygirl




I'd say that I'm a mix of extreme persona's rolled into one complex psyche.

I relate as much to Spock of the last film as I do to Krik or Scottie.

Different personas pop out as seems best.

reply to post by Stormdancer777

can read people pretty well on the internet too.

I feel deep regret over hurting anyone to the point of unhealthy hyper consciousness, and dwell on it obsessively, I'm a wreck.

I do it too. Thats the part of me I'm trying to improve. I'm still learning. The internet helps me socialize on a level that I find difficult in ordinary life.

So sorry If I have offended you on any other posts… ( I know we have disagreed elsewheres about religion.)

webedoomed
reply to post by jacygirl

 

I'd say that I'm a mix of extreme persona's rolled into one complex psyche.

I relate as much to Spock of the last film as I do to Krik or Scottie.

Different personas pop out as seems best.

Ahh...hahaha....for some reason, this Spock quote came to mind when I read your response!
"Christopher Pike: Are you giving me attitude, Spock?"

"Spock: I am expressing multiple attitudes simultaneously. To which are you referring?"

jacygirl

reply to post by intrptr

Pleased to meet ya!

Pleased to meet you, too!!

So - perhaps you all can help me be better at 'internet' interpretation, because, as I've said, I have a hard time if I can't see the person's eyes....hear their tone of voice. I'm a 'writer', so the written word is very crucial to my 'interpretation'. When one has studied literature, psychology, body language, etc - but has no access to the actual person, it's easy to 'project' what one perceives. That's where I trip up.

If I don't get enough info, I can only 'interpret' or "project" . I think many times people are put off by my questions; and I know sometimes I am put off by theirs....that's why I ask those questions!

But some take it as an attack.

reply to post by webedoomed

I wonder what it is when someone can both be highly empathic (both cognitive/affectively) or turn it down, else shut if off entirely?!

I think thats healthy, too.

Riding to the rescue during trouble and saving others. Putting aside the squeamish response and rising to the occasion…

Thats admirable. I can watch stuff on TV, too. I know its just a light box and I can remain in the room instead of being sucked into the violence or injustice I see on it.

I also stop on the road to help injured animals and people in need. I used to live under bridges and helped others when I could. Thas real good training for the soul.

intrptr
reply to post by Stormdancer777

 

So sorry If I have offended you on any other posts… ( I know we have disagreed elsewheres about religion.)

That was good of you to say!
You see, webedoomed and I got a little snarky with each other on another thread, but it was just different perspectives (which we're all entitled to!)
Now we are being friendly, because it's silly and unproductive to be mean. Also, I have much respect for webedoomed, whether we agree all the time, or not.

I find being extremely empathic also makes me somewhat diplomatic, lol.
jacygirl

Woops! Out of consideration for savagediver's decision to delete her post, I will delete my response (which included her post).

wildtimes
reply to post by intrptr

 

Pleased to meet ya!

Pleased to meet you, too!!

So - perhaps you all can help me be better at 'internet' interpretation, because, as I've said, I have a hard time if I can't see the person's eyes....hear their tone of voice. I'm a 'writer', so the written word is very crucial to my 'interpretation'. When one has studied literature, psychology, body language, etc - but has no access to the actual person, it's easy to 'project' what one perceives. That's where I trip up.

If I don't get enough info, I can only 'interpret' or "project" . I think many times people are put off by my questions; and I know sometimes I am put off by theirs....that's why I ask those questions!

But some take it as an attack.

E_X_A_C_T_L_Y.

I have the same problem, too. It means you are visual based, and require that input to base your judgements on. Thats your strength. One way to interpret this is your empathy for others. You can read them when eye to eye because you do care, you are able to disassociate from your self to their viewpoint. Thats a much more powerful gift than some others. But puts you at a disadvantage when exchanging notes.

I tend to just say what I have to say and be damned if I am ostracized. I know this because I have a shill, debunking rep here. Does that bother me? Yes and no (if I know what I am talking about). I guess that and an apology helps to keep me honest.

I'll let others answer that and check back later.

reply to post by savagediver

edit on 31-1-2014 by savagediver because: I'm sorry-I thought I was logged in

But - you were logged in!

Consarn it!! (as my gma used to say)....
now I want to repost what you and I deleted!! LOL

Oh well. Have a good rest.

reply to post by intrptr


I think it takes time and consistency to get to know someone online.
By consistency, I mean...if a member seems to show certain personality traits in their writing, after a while you form an impression of the writer.
I don't really start threads here, but I do actively respond to others. I was pretty sure that no one paid any attention to me, lol...but recently I've been getting quite a few 'friend' requests! (Yay!)
I also think it's important to understand that we aren't always going to agree on every topic, but that's not the same as disrespecting a member. I can argue a point or perspective with someone, without 'hating on them'.
If someone gets nasty with me, I just leave the thread. If someone gets nasty with someone else, I tend to run in and defend whoever is being attacked.
I find it interesting to read how different people interpret the different topics.

jacygirl

reply to post by intrptr

So sorry If I have offended you on any other posts… ( I know we have disagreed elsewheres about religion.)

aww sorry here too, although I don't remember ;o)

reply to post by jacygirl

I also think it's important to understand that we aren't always going to agree on every topic, but that's not the same as disrespecting a member. I can argue a point or perspective with someone, without 'hating on them'.
If someone gets nasty with me, I just leave the thread. If someone gets nasty with someone else, I tend to run in and defend whoever is being attacked.
I find it interesting to read how different people interpret the different topics.

Brilliant.

And, I'm glad you chimed in here, and are getting 'friended'!!
You deserve it! (IMO).